To purg or not to purge

[CherylFlint]

I think I’ve purged about 5 times. Funny thing is, I’ve had “purge remorse” each time. You’d think I would’ve learned after the first few, but after the 5th time I decided to call it quits: no more purging, because, you all understand, it’s a COMPLETE waste of time, effort, money, and saying goodbye to many things that are simply irreplaceable.
I had a short plaid pleated skirt that I gave to Goodwill 20 years ago that, to this day, I miss dearly.
So, the point of this thread is to warn my sisters out there to NEVER-EVER PURGE!
You’ll regret it!
So here’s my question: am I normal in my “purge remorse” or not?
And after reading my piece, here, would you consider purging in the future?
I previously purged to “cure” myself.
Obviously, it didn’t work. I tried to fight something that is impossible to fight.
I’d like a bumper sticker that read:
SAY NO TO PURGING

[ArleneRaquel]

Darlin,
Purging will not cure "it". Please don't purge ever again. It is a a terrible thing to do. I have purged many times in the past and have always returned to the life I live as a woman now, and I have done so since 2004, and I love it. Thats my opinion.

[Kris Avery]

Why not just put it up out of reach for a few months.
Revisit it after say 60 days... if you hate it then, save it another 60 days.
If it fails twice... you can let it go and probably won't miss it.

It's like a double trial run on purging.

[ShelbyDawn]

This has come up on our forum quite a bit and almost without exception, remorse follows the purge.
I have purged three times over the past five years and I still miss some of my favorite outfits and shoes - yes shoes - oh the agony!!!.

My advice; get a secure location out of sight and out of mind and stash your pretties.
Then, when the urge returns, as it always seems to, you don't have to start over...

Best of luck.

You most certainly are not alone...

[AllieSF]

I don't know if you are normal with your "purge remorse". However, I do believe that you are a very slow learner. You buy stuff, maybe wear it once in a while and then throw it all away, which you obviously did not want to do deep down inside, and then go out and spend more money to replace it? Maybe one or two times, then I would have learned very well not to do that again. Store it out of sight and mind and then decide what to do in the future. You maybe need to take a class on how to learn quicker from life's experiences. Do those classes exist??

[charlenesomeone]

I agree completely. Did the purge several times and miss something's
terribly. Get a large plastic tub, seal it and put it out of sight. Or just keep
on dressing.

[Heather Anne]

I purged twice between 2000 and 2004. Really regret that. In fact I had 2 very special outfits I wish I still had. They were a one piece coulotte outfit that I bought at K-Mart.

[Kate Simmons]

I doubt I will ever "purge" again but maybe in the not too distant future I may hang up my wigs and bras if necessity is laid upon me.

[Raychel]

Way better off to accept yourself and just enjoy life.
Purging never ends well.

I have done it in the past, and yes the remorse was there.
it cost me a lot of money to restock. and some things could never be replaced.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Cheryl, For what it cost to replace everything you could rent a small storage cell.

[CherylFlint]

The point is that purging doesn't cut it, so don't do it.

[Tiffany Jane]

Out of sight, out of mind is better than realizing you have thrown out a part of yourself. Purging is hard when it is something you emotionally, physically, or spiritually are attached to. Each of us have our own reason for doing what we do and therefore have different reactions to purging. I agree, the restocking fee of the process and finding the right clothes/shoes in my size is the worse. Bag it or box it up. Leave it out of sight for awhile and when the need to look at it comes up, go through it and see how you feel about the things in there. Maybe you're battling a sense of wardrobe identity and just need a style change.

[Rachael Leigh]

Oh yes purge regret is very real for me. The most recent one was for me my most regrettable one. I gave away some really cute clothes and the best wig Ive ever owned. I still have yet to replace that wig but hope to very soon.
It's much better to just store than toss that's for sure

[AngieStone]

I have purged a few time just like everyone else, but every time I do there is something that I wish I had back. Onetime I purged a cute skirt that I just loved and it fit me well and I have never been able to replace it, along with a pair of wedge sandals that I just loved. I sure do wish I had both of them back. So every time I have felt like I needed to purge I just remember the skirt and heels and I am then cured.

[mechamoose]

My belief is that 'purging' happens when your GI imbalance tips too far to one side and you switch from 'denial' and into 'revulsion'.

It is (not the same) but like trying to kick a habit. You can get rid of the trappings and gear, but you have not addressed the 'core' issue... so it will return.

I think you should look inside yourself, see what is there, and try and figure out how to incorporate that into your life instead of trying to deny its existence. If you *don't* do that, it will keep coming back. Over and over and over.... no matter how many times your purge.

Don't torture yourself, and DON'T waste those pretty things you acquired! Where are you gonna find shoes like that again????

- MM

[Ashley Lyn]

I had a short plaid pleated skirt that I gave to Goodwill 20 years ago that, to this day, I miss dearly.
So, the point of this thread is to warn my sisters out there to NEVER-EVER PURGE!
You’ll regret it!

I always wondered who might have given that skirt up!
I absolutely love it too.. Many thanks..

[cdterri]

I don't really purge, but I do regularly either outgrow or decide I no longer like some things and donate them.However many times I have wished I had some of those things back.

[JamieTG]

Purging is usually an impulsive act based on guilt. I purged many times when I was a young adult. I haven't purged in about 15 years because I decided to stop fighting it and just accept myself. Once the guilt is gone, you won't want to purge.

[marsha leanne]

like wendy o said. put it out of reach for a time. then check back in. I purged once way back when. never again! I mourned the loss for weeks. I need to 'thin out' at the moment, but that is due to changing size and fashion.

[PattiL]

It's been said several times however I would agree - every time that I've purged in the past I regret it. I have always come back and each time want something I've gotten rid of. Now I'm keeping everything!

[vallerie lacy]

No doubt that purging is a waste of money. It's also a waste of part of ones life. If only I had never purged, I'd need a second bedroom, but I'd still have so many more articles of happiness.

[Annaliese]

Yes, it a hard lesson we learn, but it like everything else, they have to learn the hard way, I see it over and over again with my student, and my children, they have to learn on there own, I never listened, and had to learn the hard way, it a right of passage to make your own mistakes. I wish it works this way and that other can learn from our mistakes, and a few will, but most won't.

[Erica2Sweet]

Addressing the conflict that is causing the guilt and/or desire to effect change in life will alleviate the desire to purge. If someone is trapped in a cycle of buy and purge, they are not addressing the root of the problem which is internal conflict. It's a choice we make and I really do feel its the responsibility of each of us as adults to work it out, in order to be happier and healthier for ourselves and those around us.

If one cannot participate in something without doing damage to the rest of his or her life, that individual should likely stop the activity until they can get a handle on it. That doesn't mean they have to toss their possessions though...

[kimdl93]

It's true...i would venture to guess that every purge is followed by regret. Unfortunately, purges are impulsive acts in most cases. Probably little reflection about the consequences precedes.

[Alice Torn]

When it is time to be put into a nursing home, or some dire circumstances like having to go to prison, or suddenly homeless, it is a possibility.