Is your "femininity" actually all about how good u look? C'mon, fess up!

[docrobbysherry]

I started down this road out of the blue in my 50's. At first, I thot I wanted to have real breasts and fantasized about becoming a complete female. However, after dressing in secret for nearly a year, I became very disenchanted with my looks. Out of desperation, I tried on a mask and Sherry was born. Altho I was pleased with my looks for the next 10 + years, it took me that long to work out the truth about myself.

That I'm not TS. I don't even have a fem side. My dressing is almost all about how I look!

U can call me vain, a fetish dresser, or whatever derogatory thing u like. But, the fact is, there r MANY MORE LIKE ME OUT THERE!

Aren't there?

[Katey888]

Sherry - you're vain and you're a fetish dresser... You're also fantastic, honest as the day is long and I love the way you do things...

You do what you do for you (don't we all?)

We all do what we do in individual and subtly unique ways...

We mostly exude a healthy aura of vanity and narcissism...

So what?

The success you have in interacting with folk, the way they interact so positively with you is a great thing for you and I think, a great benefit for all of us.

I don't believe - however - that for many of us our femininity is just about looks... and for many of us it goes much more deeply than that. But then perhaps Sherry is really the very best example of a persona that is truly a facade...

Katey x

[Alberta_Pat]

For me, dressing is a form of relaxation. I enjoy getting out with others of like mind.

While I am not vain, I do try to present as well as possible.

[Alice Torn]

DRS, I always like your posts and threads, just telling us like it is. I kind of relate. I am a sensitive, yet dirty, greasy, sweaty blue collar man, but have a need to get cleaned up, and dressed completely , wig to heels a few or several times a month. Being artistic, also, despite blue collar, I love the creativity and art form in my dressing. I am pretty vain, pardon the pretty pun, and way too self centered and judgmental, to be very honest. It is mainly about the clothes, but i feel like a woman when dressed. You are very open and honest about where you have been, and where you are. Thanks.

[JessicaJHall]

Very well said Katey! After all, how we look often effects how we feel, and how we feel definitely effects how we act, and that goes for all kinds of people, not just CDs.

[JayeLefaye]

U can call me vain, a fetish dresser, or whatever derogatory thing u like. But, the fact is, there r MANY MORE LIKE ME OUT THERE!

Aren't there?

I am sure, Sherry, that there are a bunch out there, and God bless ya for being one of them!!!! Ya's make this ol' world a much more colorful place. And I hope some chime in to 'fess up:-)

But as for me, it IS about exploring the feminine within.

Carry on, and wear it like ya mean it!!!

Jaye

[Requal Jo]

I think you have all said it very well. Dressing for me is about relaxation. De-stressing from a heavy day, getting rid of a bad mood, making me feel happy and comfortable.

While it may all be about ME, it is a wonderful and fantastic feeling of release that I will always cherish and enjoy.

[Stephanie47]

"..the quality or nature of the female sex.."

"...the quality of being feminine; womanliness.."

"..A characteristic or trait traditionally held to be female.."

I have to desire to become a female or live as a female. If I were not a male, I would definitely would want to be a female. So, what does that mean to me? I had to go to the Internet dictionaries and look it up. It does not tell me much, since, all of those definitions are in the eye of the beholder. I will never "Pass" as a woman in the eye of the beholder because my manly frame and face preclude it. So, what do I think of myself? Am I womanly? My physique is womanly to me! Of course, I do not get close to the mirror. I stand back. Today I made a pot of meatballs. As I labored over the stove I can see myself in a full length mirror twenty feet away. I look like a woman. I have on a pretty dress, heels and hosiery (and all the proper undergarments) and a grey wig. I think I look attractive. Do I feel womanly? Yes, my movements when en femme come naturally. I push away the stray hair from my face. I smooth the skirt of my dress. My actions are that of a woman. That makes me feel womanly. Feminine? My gestures are feminine. Obviously, I do not have to make any of those movements in jeans and a tee shirt, and, almost bald head.

I dress tastefully. I dress as my vision of a woman should. And, that is the key. I know many of you youngsters dress appropriately for your image- very short dress, very high heels, and such. yes, you look feminine too. In the eye of the beholder.

Above all, I feel comfortable in my skin. I really have never had a masculine side or a feminine side. My inner self has always been the same, whether I'm wearing the clothes of a woman or the clothes of a man.

[Rachael Leigh]

When I dress without makeup at home it doesn't matter but yes I have to say I want to look as feminine as possible when I go all out. I mean I'm going to all that work makeup and all I should try even though I'm well aware of my limitations since I am a guy

[Ressie]

My brain reacts to other senses besides sight, although sight is #1. Tactile senses and even hearing are also part of the CD experience. The smell of makeup, lipstick etc. enters into the picture a bit too.

I'd say I've had TS moments in my life, but I too am basically a fetish CD. I don't know what biological women actually feel like inside, so speaking of feeling feminine doesn't make sense. It's all imagination and hormones for this gurl.

[Barbara Dugan]

Yes it is , I am a Gay Transvestite and I don't have the same feelings while I am on drab

[NicoleScott]

Yes, there are a lot of us that dress for the mirror, though some don't like to admit it.
When I was child going on driving trips with my family, the rest of us would stay in the car while my dad would inspect the motel room for cleanliness, etc. When I travel alone with the opportunity to dress, I like to inspect rooms for mirrors and lighting. On my list of "crossdressing essentials", mirrors are high.

[Talisker]

Since I'm not female I have no idea what it feels like. For me it's fun and fantasy, break from reality and many of the clothes have a special feel. Mirrors help the fantasy and men are much more stimulated by looks compared to GG s. Explains why rich men get the bimbos!

[jeank]

I don't think it's about how "good" I look - But it's certainly how good I feel. Often I won't bother with a wig, so I'll be a guy with lipstick, boobs and a dress (or top and skirt, or.....) and it feels right.

[UNDERDRESSER]

Well Duh!


I like legs. I think skirts are flattering to legs, and if you have good ones, a skirt enhances that. They look sexy, even basic ones that come down to the knee, hell, even long skirts! I think I have good legs, (GF tells me so anyway) I like to make the best of them. And to sweeten the pot, skirts are WAY more comfortable than pants or shorts! And yes, it's quite exciting to put yourself on display like that.

[Allisa]

True I do try to look my best when dressing to express my "femininity" but that is not what dictates it, for my femme side is something deeper than my looks and is incorporated into my being. Of course I am always trying to improve my appearance in some way and keep it as soft as I can.


Bye-Bye Lisa.

[Kris Avery]

Hey, talisker, my SO calls Me HER bimbo.....what does that make her?

On topic,
I love to dress as it connects what is inside me with what is outside...without plumbing changes.
He best of both worlds....at least for me.

[Jessicaa]

It definitely plays a big part for me because as all of us know, there is no better feeling than looking at yourself in the mirror after spending an hour plus getting pretty! But for me I don't think that its all of it. For me it is a way to relax and connect with a side of myself that I couldn't do in any other way,the majority of the time I spent dressed is without doing my makeup or wearing a wig, Most of the time i just like dressing femme and relaxing with my softer side, it is very therapeutic.

[Kate Simmons]

Hi RS, I will only say this my friend. Nothing at all wrong about looking good en femme. Call it a fetish if that makes you feel better because I personally answer to no one but myself.

[kimdl93]

Not for me...I don't want to frighten children or small animals, but I don't dress to be sexy or gorgeous. Why set myself up for such disappointment?

[Sarah Doepner]

Sherry, I sure hope it's not only about how I look. It better have something to do with how I feel because regardless of what I see in the mirror, I usually feel much better than I look. I could end up being very disenchanted with the whole effort if I'm going to base it on only on what I end up looking like. I do the best I can, but will never make the cut into the world of passing. That's my story and I'm sticking with it.

[MsVal]

U can call me vain, a fetish dresser, or whatever derogatory thing u like.

I think that all of us have at least something that is not "normal" (whatever "normal" means), and none of us are in a position to denigrate any of the others. As far as what to call you, I'd sooner use "friend" than any other term.

[LilSissyStevie]

My "femininity" is all about being not-masculine and has little to do with representing an actual female. It's extreme "femininity" or why bother. The look is important but it's only a part. To the extent that it's sexual, it's fetishistic.

[charlenesomeone]

My dressing is about the feeling and look. The feel of a bra, earrings touching my face, a necklace, skirt or dress swish.
A wig, lipstick , makeup or not. Touching smooth legs.
If you look good, you feel good! If you feel good, what else matters.