Normally I don,t wear shape wear. OK I used to years ago (30+) for all the wrong reasons and maybe I'll just leave it at that.
In case anyone doesn't know, I'm what you would call a big girl. Size 26-28 or 30-32 depending on the maker so I have no delusion that a girdle of any kind is going to hold any of this in. Most it will do is maybe smooth out the bumps and bulges. I have a hand full of tops that due to gall bladder surgery 25+ years ago (the old way with a massive scar) happen to show that particular bulge and of course there's the "rolls" as well. So I have a couple of light to medium, high waist long leg girdles that take care of the problem. One that I have had a while that takes care of the problem but tends to roll down and requires a lot of tugging and readjusting. The other one I just bought because it was advertised and because it was not supposed to roll down. Last Saturday night we decided to do dinner at Champp's and take in a movie. I was getting dressed and I put on a new pair of jeans with black sequined embroidery down the legs. In my mind this called for a black top. You can see where this is going. The only black top that seemed to look right was one of the aforementioned bulge activators. Realizing that I thought "I'll wear my new girdle"
Note: Don't ever do this with out a test drive. Any way throwing caution to the wing I wiggled in to the damn thing and bulges contained off we went. We arrived at the restaurant and all seemed normal. Feeling bulge free and confident in my new wonder garment I sat down to enjoy a club sandwich and Ice tea. We finished dinner and as I stood up to leave something didn't feel right. I quickly felt around my waist and the girdle was gone. Well not gone exactly just slipped down about 5 inches. Not rolled but slipped. By the time I walked to the car the waistband was down to the center of my more than ample tush. We drove across the parking lot to the theater and when I got out of the car it had slipped even further. Figuring the best solution was to get to the ladies room in the theater as soon as possible and make necessary adjustments we headed in that direction all the while my SO asking "what's wrong". Walking across the lobby it slipped to my knees with the crotch area lined up with the crotch of my jeans causing me to walk in some combination of a geisha and a Sumo wrestler. At this point my SO must have figured it out because it was all she could do to keep from laughing hysterically. I made it to the ladies room after a long walk across the lobby that at the time felt like a couple of miles. I made it into a stall took that cursed garment off stuck it in my purse and walked out of the ladies room commando style not really caring what may bulge.
I threw the offending item away as soon as we got home. As for my SO she laughed all the way home and still chuckles every time she thinks about me shuffling to the ladies room.
Anyone else have a similar story to tell???
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Originally Posted by Michelle James
