For a little while now, I've had the wonderful change of actually being able to experience emotions; this has been fantastic but with one caveat. When I'm in a stressful situation or upset in any way I can't help but feel tears welling up. To combat this I end up turning upset/hurt/stressed in to angry/bitchy.
So, how have the rest of you learned to deal/cope with this? Or is this pretty much the norm and I just need to learn to filter better?
Great question Hun, at my job I have a boss whom is parental to the point people who dont for work him say " wow how do handle it, when he talks to you like that"? I, by going to my GID specialist i.e. release /re-setting my internal stress gauge (whom has just approved my start of HRT). Which why I felt this question most relevant. Second ill take a break from intense moment by asking to be excused from the start of passive aggressive situation ramps up, i.e. (Excuse me, but may be excused real quick for a bathroom, I was just going to go prior to you calling me in here"?). No matter what, they cant stop you from being excused....I walk down the hall way go through the motions and say mentally x,y,z to my self as to the situation. Working out, running early also helps win win because the body gets /keeps our sexy figure to stress management. but with that my GID specialist warns of more T being produced too.....
xo Kara
Escapism isn't necessarily bad, but is definitely unhealthy in the long term. While helpful in the short term, things will degrade over time. At some point, the escapee will have to face the issue. Things simply blowing over isn't really going to happen in many situations.
After a lifetime of bottling up emotions, it felt good to be able to let go, but, at 3-5 months HRT, I cried at everything. Hallmark cards, babies, chick flicks, and puppies got the waterworks going. Now that the HRT induced emotions have settled, I have regular women's emotions, and kind of enjoy them.
Just go with the flow, no point fighting your emotions, or getting upset by them, they are a sign of womanhood.
I've been meditating for several years now. It really helps me remove myself from a stressful situation.
Early in my transition I found the smallest things were making me cry. Like songs and other stupid things. And at work, don't even get me started. I felt like the bathroom stalls were more for crying than their intended purpose.
Emotions are such a wonderful thing, aren't they? For those of us that were taught to just ignore or to suppress emotions, we might not know how to control our emotions now that we are free to express them. Here are a few tips to get you started:
When you see your mood changing, leave from whatever is causing it and take several deep breaths, think about what was done or said to upset and figure out another way of dealing with it instead of getting upset.
Don't assume everything is about you if something goes wrong with someone else unexpectedly. Some people may just be having a bad day. Or you may have caught them at the wrong time.
Some experiences like watching a film, hearing a sound or tasting a food (sensory input) can trigger or bring about good emotions. The more good ones you can recognize, pay attention to and be aware of, the easier it is to put yourself in that kind of a recognizable mood. It's far easier to get out of an angry or sad state of mind when you can know what happy or joyful state of mind is like.
Sometimes it's helpful to keep a binder with lined paper. Then at the end of the day when you're in bed you can write down all your thoughts and emotions.
Don't let the fear from the past keep you distracted from your future.
Learn to recognize and anticipate "triggers" that set you off. Make your first goal to keep a cool head - in public. Be secure in the fact that you can always safely address and calm your emotions however you want to in private.
Try making a list of a bunch of feelings you want to be aware of either feeling or avoiding. Each day leave a check or mark by them as you accomplish or fail to accomplish your goal.
I hope this helps.
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