Best if both worlds

[Claire Cook]

We have so many posts about problems with wives / GF’s /SO’s and our dressing that I wanted to share a positive note with you all. First, at the outset I am blessed – married 45+ years to a wonderful woman who accepts me as I am. So yesterday was Sue’s birthday. Started with bringing her morning coffee in bed, then her card and presents (I was wearing my nightie…). Then she said “You know, I’d love to spend part of the day being domestic. Why don’t we go to the Palm Beach Gardens Mall, and then to Trader Joe’s? They just opened a store on PGA Boulevard.” Me: “The girls?” “Of course, the girls!”

So off we go. First stop, Williams and Sonoma for the veggie slicer we’ve always wanted. And of course she found a cookbook she had to have. Then to Oil & Vinegar to refill our lavender vinegar bottle (“But ladies, I can’t refill a dirty bottle. Let me get you a clean one.”) Oh. Then lunch at Nordstrom’s Café, and of course wandering through Nordy’s … she was not in the mood to try anything on, so I repressed the urge to try everything on. Then to T. Joe’s, which we just LOVE, to stock up. Everywhere we went we were greeted as “Ladies”, and of course Claire is so much more chatty (and fun) than her male self.

Back home. Time for husband time. First some fixup stuff in the yard, then time to use some of the pressies – new cheese board and cheese knives and some Humboldt Fog goat cheese (if any of you know this, it is WONDERFUL). Then dinner. I took her to the Melody Inn, a Swiss restaurant in Vero Beach that we have always wanted to try. Great veal dishes and, yes, a bottle of French Burgundy for a truly romantic and enjoyable dinner.

So yes, this was the best of both worlds. But every time I think about (or enjoy) something like this, my heart goes out to those of you who can’t have the best of both worlds with your wives/SO’s/GF’s. I only wish it could be so.

[Amanda1128]

You have been blessed with a true partner. Good for you. I hope you have many more years together.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Claire, It's the little things that make it all worthwhile. Happy Birthday Sue

[Melissa in SE Tn]

What a nice adventure you both shared. Yes, it would be heavenly if we all were blessed with your relationship with Sue. What joy you must feel... Peace, mel

[kimdl93]

It takes two special people to make our kind of lifestyle work in a relationship. That's what you both are!

[SamanthaSometimes]

I get the impression that you guys would enjoy each other's company this much regardless of the CDing. The fact that your wife can accept you for the full person you are and still have this type of relationship is remarkable. You both are truly blessed and I'm so glad you are enjoying life this much together.

[charlenesomeone]

What a wonderful day that you both enjoyed. Sounds like you both are blessed with each other.
Hugs

[Amanda M]

Claire - bless you both. I'm lucky like you. I just hope that we don't ever undervalue what we have, and keep a space in our hearts for those who don't have our good fortune.

[justmetoo]

That's lovely, Claire! Happy birthday to Sue! You sound like a wonderful couple.

[Beverley Sims]

Claire,
Doesn't it give you a warm fuzzy feeling to have a relationship like you have.

[Claire Cook]

Thank you all for your wonderfully warm responses. Yes, we are both very lucky.

A few thoughts. This hasn't happened overnight. Our relationship has grown and deepened over the years, and like any good marriage is the result of lots of give and take. It's taken years to ripen and mature. Whatever Sue's original thoughts were about my TG, she realized that that's only a small part of the package -- there's so much more that we share (even though we don't have kids). I'd told her during the first year of our marriage that I liked to wear women's clothes, but as I've mentioned in other recent posts, there was a long period when I did not dress. The fact that we can now share both girl things and typical married couple things is really special. (Being semi-retired helps.)

Perhaps the take-home is that it is the whole package of everything that we share that makes this work. That, plus the fact that she couldn't live with a macho, alpha-male type. She told me early on that it was my sensitivity and gentility that attracted her to me -- and likewise for me. As I said in my original post, I just wish that other wives / SO's could be as understanding as Sue is. In our case, it's taken time -- just like a really good wine.

[Kris Avery]

Claire, your story sounds similar to mine....I also have a one in a billion wife...