Most all of us here, save perhaps some of the real girls, stand somewhere in the sliding scale of the transgender spectrum. As such all of us must sooner or later come to a crossroads of sorts and answer to the question of just how much we are going to allow our transgendered feelings to infiltrate and rule our lives. To the most extreme examples within our community, this will include transexualism and gender reassignment. On the least extreme side of the bell curve we have those of us who only occasionally dabble in experimentation with a few articles of clothing now and then. Yet we all share a common bond. We have an affinity for feminine clothing and that which is feminine within us.
I see many examples of "girls" here who seem to go out of their way to try and prove to others just how really feminine they are, though. It's almost as if they are forcing themselves into an alternate reality where they really are the almost cliche "woman trapped in a man's body". Hey, if that's true, it's also probable that your only road to true happiness will be through transition and gender reassignment. But more often, these individuals are only trying to fool themselves, and aren't really fooling anyone around them. Ask yourself, is transition really what you want? Do you not have the opportunity to masquerade as a woman now? Do you really want to go through all the hardship of transition just so you can do that permanently and for the rest of your life? Some really do, but the statistical prevalence of true transexualism is rather low.
Furthermore, many crossdressers allow their little habit to take over their lives, consume their every waking thought, slide them down into depression and despair, and ruin them as normal, well adjusted members of society. All this just because the world feels a little better to you in pantyhose and high heels? Why? All people need to strike a balance of some kind in their lives, crossdressers and other transgendered people all the more so. We cannot allow obsession to rule the way we live. But so many of us lack that balance, and are looking for answers that may never come until we find that balance. This balance has nothing at all to do with accepting spouses, passing in public, or whether we sit down to pee or not. It starts in your head, where you and only you can answer the most important question that nags at you: How do I come to grips with the fact that I am transgendered?
Self acceptance is the first step. There is no way anyone else can accept you until you first accept yourself. It's not a difficult thing to do. You must simply accept within yourself that crossdressing is something you enjoy. Then and only then can you pull in the reigns and strike the balance you need in your lives. Crossdressing need not be an obsession. With the right balance, whether you are in the closet or out in public or out to your friends and loved ones, you can live with your crossdressing as a pleasant and wonderful diversion rather than a huge moral, spiritual, and obsessive weight that you carry with you each day.
I am a crossdresser. I accept it. I love it, too. I may even get a chance to dress up for a while today. But if I don't, I am not about to let the disappointment run me down and preoccupy me. I like where I'm at with it in my head. It may not be the perfect balance, but I work on it, and it's not bad. I hope that the rest of you find the balance you need, too. It makes life as a transgendered individual a whole lot better.
Originally Posted by oohTammi
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