The face in the mirror

[donnalee]

Tonight I had what might be called a sort of epiphany. I was looking in the mirror and realized that a girl (well actually, an old lady) was looking back at me. No makeup, about a day's worth of stubble, yet it was a woman. I looked at my face for several minutes and all I saw was girl, mostly my eyes and mouth (no shaped brows, although I do trim them for length).and I've grown my hair out past my shoulder blades.
I had seen her in a glance at a mirror as I passed by, but she had never stayed there, just a passing glimmer and she was gone; this time she stayed. I wore my hair a bit differently, down with no part, instead of the part I had used for years, both short and long; maybe that's what caused this; I just don't know, but she's definitely here to stay.
What I don't know yet is where do I go from here?

[Beverley Sims]

I have visions of this nature sometimes.
I do not let my imagination get the better of me though.
The mask always needs careful preparation.

[TanyaWonder]

Haha, very interesting post, thank you
Got that feelin once or twice in the past. We were kind of staring at each other. For me, its just a sign one can become the true himself (integrating the by society considered "feminine" traits) without needing to wear anything special. I realized its just me, boy or girl -who cares. Felt very good about it.

Also, today a thought popped up my head, that I can look handsome and care for myself even as a guy..which is pretty awesome realization

[Persephone]

Congratulations! It is so amazing and empowering when that happens, suddely you realize that you ("she") are real!

What I don't know yet is where do I go from here?

None of us really know where to go from here, we just know that the journey continues. Enjoy the journey!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Kate Simmons]

My face in the mirror usually gets the "raspberries" if it doesn't co-operate.

[donnalee]

I have visions of this nature sometimes.
I do not let my imagination get the better of me though.
The mask always needs careful preparation.

Well, I don't think preparation had much to do with it; perhaps deteriorating eyesight?

Haha, very interesting post, thank you
Got that feelin once or twice in the past. We were kind of staring at each other.

Exactly; it seemed we both had that "deer in the headlights" look (yeah, I know this makes no logistical sense).

Congratulations! It is so amazing and empowering when that happens, suddely you realize that you ("she") are real!
None of us really know where to go from here, we just know that the journey continues. Enjoy the journey!

Hugs,
Persephone.

Thanks!

[NicoleScott]

I wonder if it's more about how you "see" yourself even without a mirror than the image you see in the mirror.
For me, it takes a lot of makeup, a wig, and some mind-bending before I begin to see anything feminine-looking in the mirror.

Two comments about the word "epiphany".
I love Big Bang Theory. One of my favorite quotes is Penny, to Leonard "I had an epiphany, not a stroke".
I knew a guy who insisted that the correct pronunciation of Epiphone guitars was the same as epiphany. I don't know.

[Barbara Maria]

Like anything else,just take a day at a time.That's not always easy but it does work.I've had that happen quite a few times,but not without wig,eyebrow pencil,lipstick and a close shave.Then I truly see myself as a woman,and immediately feel better about myself.

[donnalee]

I wonder if it's more about how you "see" yourself even without a mirror than the image you see in the mirror.
For me, it takes a lot of makeup, a wig, and some mind-bending before I begin to see anything feminine-looking in the mirror.

I'm sure that's true.

Two comments about the word "epiphany".
I love Big Bang Theory. One of my favorite quotes is Penny, to Leonard "I had an epiphany, not a stroke".
I knew a guy who insisted that the correct pronunciation of Epiphone guitars was the same as epiphany. I don't know.

Well, at least the first two syllables are.

Like anything else,just take a day at a time.That's not always easy but it does work.I've had that happen quite a few times,but not without wig,eyebrow pencil,lipstick and a close shave.Then I truly see myself as a woman,and immediately feel better about myself.

Poor eyesight helps enormously, too! Part of it is that I don't really find heavily made-up women very attractive; natural is a lot more so.

[Sarah Doepner]

In order to answer your question of "Where do I go from here?" is to ask another. Where do you want to go?

You can go where the tides and currents take you or you can chart your own course. I'm not one to set the example, I've drifted for many years and still need to find my path. But in the meantime take joy and pleasure in coming to terms with that woman in the mirror. It's a very special moment when you see through the various layers and find something closer to your core.

[ashleymcculloch90]

For me it's never been about the reflection looking back, but the woman looking out. Because I always feel the same inside. I'll take care of the look when I have time. But to be honest most times I wish I could do away with the man looking back

[Marcelle]

Hi Donnalee,

I agree with Sarah . . . where you go from here depends solely on where you want to go. Once you have decided that then the journey begins.

Hugs

Isha

[donnalee]

Where? I'll have to figure that out as I go, but I doubt there'll be many physical mods made, due to age and health issues. My body seems to be working on it's own changes and I'm dressed 24/7 except for some unavoidable business with others that requires drab.