I recall the line in the sand days, the never again moments. I'm just back from a long hiatus (that wasn't due to one of the afore-mentioned moments) and I plan to embrace her and hold on as long as possible.
I recall the line in the sand days, the never again moments. I'm just back from a long hiatus (that wasn't due to one of the afore-mentioned moments) and I plan to embrace her and hold on as long as possible.
I did stop completely once...for two years. I was drafted. I was not issued anything but what Uncle Sam thought I needed which was basic white tees and boxer shorts and various olive drab green attire. No pink nylon panties or pantyhose, etc. I traded the white tees and boxer shorts for OD green in the Nam. I tried to blend into the landscape, although that had a different meaning back then than now. I wasn't too successful on occasion. Having accomplished the ultimate..staying alive, I decided wearing frilly stuff wasn't such a bad thing. At my age I figure it would be hopeless and pointless to try to quit. Ah, life goes on! I just purchased two dresses, one bra and another white slip on eBay yesterday. I have to at least wait until my purchases arrive before attempting any stupidity such as wearing boring male attire all the time. I spent most of the day in a Playtex black bra, black Vanity Fair panties, black George thigh high stockings with a black garter belt, black heels and a black nylon slip. Much nicer than the Levi's i have on right now.
No I love it too much to give up.
After decades of quitting then returning I finally found peace when I accepted that I am feminine man. I love wearing women's clothes and have no desire to return to the days of binge, purge, suppress....
k' after reading the posts...I'm starting to understand your very deep felt convictions...'bout time? I have just finished a post concerning how I have become 'sentimentally attached' to my first pair of 2" pumps...and considering the 'Purging phenomena'...uhm, I don't think that I could 'purge' my 2" pumps, hmm.
I have invested time and money...and more importantly; I have discovered something about myself. I claim to be a straight-crossdresser...the question must be asked, "Then what's the point, why am I progressing down this path with this mind set?" Yesterday, my daughter (yep, she's been visiting for the past few days...and she is fully and completely aware of my activities {I will not live a secret life with those whom I have a responsibility to provide 'stewardship'}) asked me: "Who I was hoping to find (with respect to a relationship)". My response was a woman; however, the reasoning is interesting...when crossdressing; I'm attempting to capture the elegance, grace and class of what I consider to be the quintessential ideal of womanhood. I enjoy art (various forms/media), and yesterday my daughter and myself worked on my make-up (first time...and my daughter is helping me...how freakin' cool is that?)...and that's when it all came together. I see myself as an 'almost blank slate/canvas' that I am able to transform into something far more beautiful that 'I' would ever think possible. "Dad, you're beautiful!" is a quote of a Lifetime. So...that's the aesthetic side...and also reveals what I'm seeking. You'll excuse me because the lines of my sexual orientation are becoming somewhat blended/blurred...If beauty is what I seek, then I have viewed a great many individuals upon this site that far exceed my idealism of womanhood...so, my sexual orientation is temporally under review and consideration. I should note, that I'm at peace with this exploration.
I would now like to discuss the emotional aspect(s) that I have noticed: As many of you have pointed out...there are emotional threads that connect crossdressing to the Softer emotions. At this juncture, in my Life, I have never been happier, more confident, out-going, feminine (obviously), etc. “Mia” is becoming a 'person/persona' in her own right. At first 'I' was animating “Mia”, and Mia represented an alternative viable path to my happiness. Despite the fact that 'I' am 'Mia', Mia's interaction with her environment most definitely differs from my usual 'modus operandi'. Please do not misunderstand...there is no blending or blurring when it comes to who is in control...Mia personality is my fabrication; however, I am starting to trust Mia...allowing her a greater range of latitude in order for her persona to mature. I'm learning a great deal from Mia...so much of what I'm experiencing is based upon: “perspective”.
One final 'point'? I know that I tend to consider and question issues to almost the point of death; however, it's my Life-long ambition to One day understand myself...this will most-likely never happen! And I can appreciate and find satisfaction in that failing...because it's not like I haven't been trying!
Thank you All!
Mia
See, I've been reading your posts! I'm just letting them percolate for awhile
Last edited by Mia Brankovic; 12-05-2014 at 04:45 AM.
WE are ALL children of The Universe...and YOU ALL have a right to be HERE
Quotes, please see: Martin Luther King, Einstein, Aristotle, Plato, Deepak Chopra, Dalia Lama, Epicurus, chogyam Trungpa, tao te ching, The tao...to name a few.
Paul Simon - "Under African Skies" & "I Know What I Know"
Mia's 'One Rule' Rule: "My Life...My RULES!"
NW-10
To throw my 2 cents in, I've tried over the years to stop cold turkey. It wasn't pretty, only came back even more so afterwards. I'm working on becoming calmer, more content, and learning what drives me to dress in hopes of at least understand this. I don't know if it will ever go away, the real question is how far am I (or you) willing to go with things.
Joan
No plans to give it up. I've learned to take it in stride, to enjoy the goodness it brings, and to exercise control over the pink fog.
Quit?? No, just the opposite. Over the past few years I have expanded all aspects of this. Dressing daily completely with full makeup, nail polish, wig has become more the rule than exception. Things can only improve from here.
Nooooo. I just got here!!
Not me. I'm trying to see how far I can expand on it. I wasted too many years fighting to deny myself as it is. I have ground to make up!
Besides, its not something I can give up. Tried it. All I did was make myself unhappy and waste a lot of money on purges.
Margot
Yes, many times I had plans to stop crossdressing, but sooner or later I returned and increasingly harder.
Gradually I´m accepting what I really feel, and that there was nothing wrong with that <3
Bye!
Nanny ❤
“ Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman. ”
- Coco Chanel
│ My Facebook & Flickr │
No, I don't have plans to stop and never have. I've put dressing on hiatus from time to time because of living arrangements, relationships, or other things going on in my life, but I knew I would dress again once the time was right.
Thank you all for your responses...
So...then, would it be safe to say that; "There is a strong emotional need to Cross-dress."?? I must create a couple of threads...I think that I may have found some Bunny-holes, Alice!
Last edited by Mia Brankovic; 12-07-2014 at 07:33 AM. Reason: spell
WE are ALL children of The Universe...and YOU ALL have a right to be HERE
Quotes, please see: Martin Luther King, Einstein, Aristotle, Plato, Deepak Chopra, Dalia Lama, Epicurus, chogyam Trungpa, tao te ching, The tao...to name a few.
Paul Simon - "Under African Skies" & "I Know What I Know"
Mia's 'One Rule' Rule: "My Life...My RULES!"
NW-10
I just stopped for while and the reasons are 2 fold. One was time, I no longer had the time because I got married and a new career. (Yes, the wife knew about my dressing). The second reason was I did not have the same desire for a while....not sure why, but the feeling never completely went away. I now have the finances to indulge a little and am back head over heels for dressing.
I feel that you cannot deny who you are and you end up cheating yourself if you do so. We only live once, and this is what I WANT to do, and I am going to do it!
let me add, I Too have stopped numerous times. The last being 2009 when i was planning to get married (which i did). I was determined that my wife to be didnt need a man who dressed like a woman, and in doing o i convinced myself that i needed her more than the "dress."
Well fast forward to 2011, in Sept she came out to me saying that she preferred women and had a girlfriend on the side. That was the beginning of the end of our marriage. and so i moved into my own room. and Said mentally to myself, if i am sleeping alone... I am gonna dres and bought a bra-and panties secretly. But it wasnt enough and inside a few days, + with new knowledge that people at work had discovered my secret... i came out to her. (she was shocked but accepting).
But since that time, i've realized crossdressing is apart of me. In fact today, i dress 95% of the time (only for work do i dress as a man). And i am coming to realize wearing women's clothes is not crossdresing for me.... It when i dress llke a man! Dresses, Skirts are what i like. and so i am gonna wear them
Hugs Melissa
I have arrived at My End Game conclusion...
upon mastering make-up...upon this Celtic alabaster canvas...I will work on entering society using different ethic/nationalities...both Female/Male...could you imagine the learning experiences, and “That'd be so COOL!”...oh, if you've been reading my posts, then you'll understand that I am an over-acheiver...
Blue Orchid & Jorja said it best: “practice, practice, practice” (maybe not in this post...nonetheless, good advice in general!)
I'm feelin': David Bowie: “Fashion” & John Lennon: "Watching the Wheels"
& Melissa...hugs back at ya'
Last edited by Mia Brankovic; 12-07-2014 at 08:55 PM.
WE are ALL children of The Universe...and YOU ALL have a right to be HERE
Quotes, please see: Martin Luther King, Einstein, Aristotle, Plato, Deepak Chopra, Dalia Lama, Epicurus, chogyam Trungpa, tao te ching, The tao...to name a few.
Paul Simon - "Under African Skies" & "I Know What I Know"
Mia's 'One Rule' Rule: "My Life...My RULES!"
NW-10
It is strictly a very occasional thing with me, and i can stop for weeks, even months a few years back, but it is a part of me. I had hoped to have a girlfriend or wife by now, but i am afraid the lady in the mirror is her.
Now Entering: END GAME!
Exodust!
we should all band together and see if for 2015 if we can all go for a YEAR without CDing!
let's DO this!
we can do this!
(but at what cost?)
No...........
yes, is not a good things but if some trouble come up like friend, work or family and is going to be too hard , i think i stop, even if this is my side
End game... Yes I am likely to stop crossdressing as soon as all my man clothes are gone. I'll just have to wear dresses and skirts 100%.
This is an interesting subject. My wife has been away on vacation for a month, ( not expected home for another nine days ) The first 2 weeks I took full advantage of dressing every day. The next several days, including today, I have dressed in my normal male clothing and have lost the usual burning desire to dress in my special female clothes. What has happened? I can't explain it. I have so looked forward to this time dressing as "Marcie", however today I seriously feel I could purge everything and go back to my old male self. I won't do this as I have taken that route regretfully before. I know sometime in the future I will want to dress again, even if it is only grabbing an hour after my wife returns and is out shopping. I guess the feel of giving it all up is a fantasy. We are what we are!!!
Yes upon my death which we hope is a long time from here.
Megan Martin
" some guys play golf, I play girl"
I have tried to "quit" many times. It just came roaring back stronger and i would regret that i had purged everything. I quit quitting a long time ago. The urge never goes away, i am just able to suppress it better at certain times than others. To go an entire year without dressing? Impossible for me, i would have a nervous breakdown.
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