Nuture/Nature and the Girl Lizard Brain (GLB)

[Marcelle]

Hi all,

Okay I will apologize in advance to the mods/admins and whoever for posting yet another topic along this lines. However it seems to be a big point of interest and since I did not want to hijack Katey's thread . . . not to mention she accused me of being quiet so the gauntlet has been retrieved Lady Katherine . . . so I thought I would start a new thread along these lines to state my belief on this and encourage dialogue on the subject. I am going to discuss the two sides "Nurture" and "Nature" with competing views. I will apologize to our FtM brothers who may read this post. I am keeping the example MtF for ease of explanation but it would be the same for you, only in the opposite gender direction

Again this is my own take on things and to honest even the scientific literature is all over the place. However, after reading quite extensively on this subject, this is the stance I tend to believe in as it explains so much about me. I invite all to provide their input/experience . . . but's let be civil and not transcend into name calling please.

Nurture

It has been posited in various journals within the behavioral realm that rearing (how one is socialized) will determine for the most part how a person interacts with the world around them. So if we look at gender identity, we all tend to be socialized along our birth sex (boys as boys / girls as girls). We interact with others of our gender and engage in gender typical play/past-times/relationships and so on. However, for some reason some of us tend to move toward the other gender. Early behavioral understanding tried to demonstrate that TG folks must have been raised/reared in a gender atypical way . . . think boys raised in an all female home with no men to role model becoming more effeminate or a girl raised with brothers being a tomboy. However this belief was put to rest some time ago and its disfavor can be evidenced here in that many who are raised/socialized along their birth gender still grow up to have gender identity issues.

Now this is not to say that behavior cannot account for some aspects of dressing. Some work has been done on fetish dressing in that young men who experience early sexual arousal either through gender role play or use of female items of clothing can in essence spend an inordinate amount of time "chasing the dragon" sort to speak in order to recapture that first orgasm. This may lead to more dressing behavior (upping the dressing ante sort to speak) leading to full on dressing in order to be sexually aroused. I am not saying this is the sole reason but some behavioral studies do point to that link . . . though I believe there is still more there . . . explained below.

Nature

What we are talking about here is "biology" plain and simple. A lot of time is spent espousing the "genetic" theory . . . we are who we are because of our genes. I for one cannot commit to the "gene theory" anymore than I can commit to the "behavior theory". Here is my reasoning. If this could simply be explained by genetics (passed along the family line in whatever genetic delivery system) there would be a prevalence of cross dressing men/women in your family line. Genetics by nature lead to manifestations of certain traits (hair colour, eye colour, phenotypes) and certain conditions (hemophilia, cystic fibrosis, and various other diseases/disorders) which tend to run in families. If this were so for being TG, then there would be a history of it in the family line. It might skip a generation but it would be close at hand (i.e., not a distant relation). Now many here might say "Well perhaps they hid it well?" Seriously? . . . As we all know, this thing does not stay secret for long and I am sure you would have heard the hushed stories about "Uncle Dave" or "Grandpa" who had a proclivity for ladies things.

Now not to deny the "nature" aspect it's day in court I do hold to some of the studies currently looking at the effect of prenatal hormones on the development of the human brain. Studies have shown that the human brain differentiates early in development both structurally and functionally in a sexually dimorphic way. Researchers have demonstrate that there are clear structural sex differences in the central nucleus of the bed nucleus of the stria terminalis (BSTc) - a part of the hypothalamus. This difference between men and women is related to size and the number of somatostatin immunoreactive neurons. Studies have shown that those suffering from gender identity issues tend to have BSTc which are more typical of the opposite gender. Okay someone is going to jump and say "Yes but Isha, I am a cross dresser plain and simple. I know I am a man so I don't have gender identity issues" . . . Well, I suppose that could be true but let me ask you to suspend disbelief for a second and follow me down this garden path . . .

. . . We can all agree we are an eclectic bunch. There are fetish dressers, some who just like to dress up (makes you feel good) then put it away, others like to dress up and go out, others prefer to live life presenting female for some proportion of time while others will live life as a woman 24/7 and never transition (no SRS) and others will go the whole distance (SRS). To be honest, IMHO no matter which way you skin this cat we all have an innate need to present on some level as a woman. Be it just wearing some aspect of women's clothing (for what ever reason / sexual/ feeling good) or presenting to the Vanilla world as female. You may be able to say "I am truly male" (or not) but IMHO you are splitting hairs . . . you like to dress/present as the opposite gender in some form or another for whatever reason so your gender identity is not as black and white as you think. Soooo (and stay with me ) . . .

. . . If we hold to the hormone wash theory above it is plausible that some of us may have BSTc more typical of women (MtF) and as such the gender identity issues may be more prevalent. This may cause some to have an overwhelming urge to present female in public (express the inner girl to the world), partake in body modification to be seen as more female (e.g., laser hair removal, BAS, HRT) and use clothing and make-up to approximate the target gender. In this circumstance the person may identify female only (TG/TS) or still have a strong pull to his/her male identity (TG/CD) with no desire to transition but the urge to be seen as female is still very strong because the Girl Lizard Brain (GLB ) is very vocal and wants coexistence with the male identity. For those who dress on occasion (could be in the privacy of your home or in public) to relieve stress, just feel good or for sexual satisfaction but you can then pack it away for longer periods of time until the urge hits again, it is probable that your BSTc may be more typically male but with a slight pull to the female hence you gender identity is more male than female. This would afford you the opportunity to explore the "inner girl" when needed but then go back to being "Joe Dude" for most of your life. So it is probable that those who progress up to and including transition, their BSTc may be more female and hence the male identity slips away over time or the male identity remains but has to time share with the female identity which would explain the urge to dress and present female from time to time (vocal Girl Lizard Brain). Those who dress on occasion for whatever reason may still be time sharing with the "inner girl" but she has limited windows of occupancy whereas the "outer boy" holds the lion share (Not so vocal Girl Lizard Brain). This might explain why some can just dress and go back to being guy without ever giving the inner girl a second though and some may go back to being "guy" but the inner girl is still there, jumping up and down while waiting for her time share and her shouts for recognition become pervasive in your thoughts.

Now this is not biology telling to wear women's clothing, use make-up, take on female gestures or engage in what you believe to be stereotypical female pastimes (housecleaning, cooking, shopping) it is biology telling you . . . "Umm, you do realize that you have some girl in you up in the lizard part of your brain". Once you realize that (at whatever point in your life) you take the necessary steps to present as female or your version of what female means to you and in whatever manner you wish it to be (fetish, feeling good, normal gal about town).

So that is my take on things as it explains so much about me. I was raised in an all female home but I had very strong "uber-masculine" role models who initiated me in the way of guy past times. However, I can recall still liking my sister's and cousin's dresses when young but never acted on it (girl part of my lizard brain . . . saying hello). I went on to socialize male (guy friends, guy past times) joined the military and engage in Alpha Male employment, go married (twice), pro-created and with the exception of one time at the age of 17 never dressed en femme until last year (32 years later). Behaviorally I may have been supressing my "girl lizard brain" but she was still there and when she did arrive it was a force of nature to the point where I present female about 40% of my time) . . . I have a vocal Girl Lizard Brain. Now behaviorally I was raised male and socialized male. I do not have any male relatives of whom I have heard whispered stories about so the hormone wash and development of the girl lizard brain makes intuitive sense to me . . . but this my belief.

Hugs

[Eringirl]

Hey Isha: alrighty then!! It is a bit early on a Saturday morning for me to respond in a coherent fashion, so let me have a coffee (or 2) and give a chance for my furry little brain to digest this.

Will say though that there is a lot of material out there (e.g. MacLean's model) on the four quadrants of the brain and the lower lambic "reptilian" brain and how they are influenced in development and how they then influence who we are.

Let me get back to ya!

Erin

[Tina_gm]

I'm risking a brain ache with these threads.... lol. I guess based on my own experiences and observations I am on the nature side. My own kids are much different. One far more macho then the other. And THAT was never pushed on either of them.

I have a friend who is gay and was raised in a very traditional catholic Italian family. All 4 siblings are boys. 3 of them standard masculine men as was their father who was a firefighter. I have seen others too who won't mold with their environment.

If a person is geared towards the environment they are raised they will embrace it. If not, they will likely struggle with it. They may adapt to it. They may fake it or even be brainwashed into believing certain things. But something will be amiss if in nature it doesn't line up with the environment.

[GeauxStacy]

Isha,

Love the post. I have had my 3 cups of coffee and can see where you are coming from. I myself have thought about this and would have to say I have followed the same path. My girl brain first said hello when I was 13 and did not realize it. Guy brain was in charge for the next 15 years with no issues. Then Stacy said "Hello, Remember me?. For a time I let her speak but then guy brain kicked in again and said whoa partner, you need to make a choice, me or her. I chose guy brain at the time, purged and thought it was just a phase.

The only problem was Stacy never shut up completely. For the next 15 years she would say do not forget about me, but I was fighting with her. When I got on my own this year I finally said "Okay Stacy lets do it". At first it was overwhelming and there were a lot of days of confusion, anxiety, feelings of happiness and comfort, and a whirlwind of other emotions. About two months ago, guy brain did kick in and say okay that is enough. And I almost purged again but something - Stacy maybe - said no, just step back, think about you and how you feel and just let both guy brain and Stacy co-exist.

So while guy brain is still dominate in my case, Stacy still has a voice and is there. I do believe you are correct in your explanation about the lizard brain part of why we are how we are. It is not right or wrong, good or bad and just how it is.

Again, I love this post.

Big Tiger Hugs

Stacy

[samantha rogers]

Wow...I read the whole thing. My brain hurts and my eyes are bleeding. I need coffee badly.
Isha...my God, I just woke up...why do you do this to me? lol
Im opening my eyes, spotting a new entry by gf Isha, and thinking..."oh good! A new anecdote or humorous adventure to enjoy"
But instead....no...its that dreaded 7AM philosophy class that you would have slept through in bed at home, were it not for the fact the professor was sooooo hot.
Sigh...
So, yes...read the whole thing. Do I get a gold star, hot professor?
Lol
But...in a nut shell...yes.
I agree completely.
Oh, btw, I love "girl lizard brain"...tee hee Can we now refer to our GLB?
Ever read The Dragons of Eden, by the late, great Carl Sagan?
Yes. I agree. I totally accept the appraisal, Dr. Isha. :-)
Thank you for the superb analysis and well presented explanation. Your findings neatly match my own not so neat, chaotic, artistic, mental meanderings, ramblings and ruminations on the topic.
Nurture? Dont buy it.
Nature? Go heavy. Buy, buy, buy.
And yes, the personality of each of our "girl lizard brains" would account so clearly for the differences amongst us.
Sigh...
I seem to have been blessed with a very vocal GLB ...(see? We have a newly coined acronym on which to hang our problems! My GID is pronounced, Dr, because my GLB won't shut up!)....
My GLB seems to be equal parts Patti Smith, Ellen Degeneris and Marilyn Chambers each with a drink in their hand. Lol It gets pretty noisy in here sometimes.
Thanks for waking me up, doll.
Now...about that coffee...

[marshalynn]

Isha, I also believe that when our brain was being developed, the hormone mixture slid a little one way or the other a bit to make us like we are. I was raised as a normal male, but I can remember wearing my mother high heels at the age of 5 years old and liking it and it went on from there and never stopped. This was not something I was talked into doing, it was just the wright and normal thing for me to do, my brain and my internal being told me. Marshalynn

[Alicia S]

n1 Isha, full of content and makes good sense to my way of thinking and scientific background. There's soooo much muddled garbage out there!

but wow you have way too much time on your hands or are a very quick concise typist. You should get out more (lol)

Lizard brain - would that be gecko (for hanging on) or chameleon (to blend in)??

[Alice-V]

That's a rather well round up of information there, Isha. I haven't explored these issues well, so thanks for all the points provided.

The little I can contribute on the scientific side is that genetics does not necessarily mean heredity. That is traits and features may not really run in family. Mutations and gene reassignment occur everytime sex cells are made and new traits may just pop up out of nowhere. So, a minor shift here and there in the genes may be at least in part responsible for a more or less voiceful girl coexisting in a male body (or vice versa for FTM).

And as for my own story... My mother was the dominant figure in our family, dad was, well, more into the spiritual matters, and my older brother sort of took the male role, but it was mother who did it all (being the woman and man of the family). My inner girl probably said her first hello when I was a preschooler digging for skirts in my cousin's drawer when no one was around. Then there would be times I'd rather identify more with female role models than male. During my teenage years I thought I would do anything to be a girl. The urge came and went. Until recently, well... So, I would not give nurture much credit myself. I'm more for genetics/fetal development.

[Claire Cook]

Hi Isha,

We've been waiting for your take on this! Now I know it's my Girl Lizard Brain and I for one am glad it is there for whatever reason . So as to the nature - nurture: I think they feed back on each other. Maybe this was your big point, but my GLB just kept picking up on all of those things girls did and wore and tucked them away in her little GLB attic, waiting for the time when I could do them too! (Even if I was unaware of it.) I just sent off a post in Katie's thread about twin studies that might be relevant here.

BTW ... where did you get the idea for the GLB? I love it!

[Teresa]

Isha ,
For me you've got it totally right ! You have left enough flexibility to accommodate most of us ! People who start saying, " Ah But!! " have mostly been covered !
Basically we are stuck with something that exists everyday or comes and goes but it's there for life ! The days of cursing it to go away are wasted breath and soul destroying ! The feeling of shame and guilt is only induced by others so we have to try and convince them that Cding does no harm and possibly makes of us better, happier people !

[Claire Cook]

Teresa,

Your last is such a great point. Let's all heed this!

[NicoleScott]

We all know by now that crossdressing is caused by guitar playing. Case closed.
Wait a sec...... is guitar playing caused by nature or nurture? Back to square one.

Isha, we know that you composed this when you were drunk last night, and programmed your computer to post it early his morning while you slept it off.

[Marcelle]

Hi Nicole,

Darn and thought nobody would catch on to the pre-programed computer trick as a way to sleep off that bender . . . guitar playing now there is an interesting theory .

BTW ... where did you get the idea for the GLB? I love it!

I always hear about guys thinking with their Lizard Brain so it got me thinking this should not be gender exclusive so why not a "Girl Lizard Brain".

Hugs

Isha

[GretchenJ]

Good morning professor.

i had to get a cup of French roast to get through this one.

After reading this completely three times, I am in agreement with your GLB assessment. Frankly, I really don't understand for me if it was a nature or nurture for me. I did not partake in girl games or activities while a was young, did not really hang out with girls or boys while I was very young, I was a loner as a child, very shy, picked on by my peers. Maybe, it was me reaching out to try anew. I really believe that that there is some sort of chemical imbalance that contributes somewhat to my condition.

so. In essence I am totally onboard with your hybrid approach as to the reasons for what I am.

thanks for writing this post that forced me to take a well needed pause for introspection

[Marcelle]

So I did a Google search . . . you can find anything on Google and found the ever illusive Girl Lizard Brain (for all you naysayers). See photo below

Hugs

Isha

[Ceera]

It would be fascinating to see a medical study of BSTc differences among a range of CD/TG individuals, from the occasional panty wearer to someone with all out gender dysphoria and an overwhelming need to go through SRS and change their gender. It would be a great comfort for many of us in understanding our own desires, and make it so much easier to explain to family and friends why we do what we do, if we could state definitively, "Well, my doctor tested me and he says I have a M/F BSTc ratio of 60%, favoring the feminine, and that's why I like going out dressed like a girl and being accepted as one, even though I don't feel compelled to have sex change surgery." Most likely it's more complicated than that, but wow... that would make explaining ourselves so much easier.

I know in my case, I couldn't blame genetics. There are no individuals in my family history who were ever into cross-dressing or who sought to change their birth gender. I do have one female cousin (daughter of my father's brother) who came out as a lesbian when in her 30's or so, but she is quite happy with dressing and presenting as female - she simply decided to Partner with a mate of the same gender. To the best of my knowledge, all my other relatives were or are quite straight and comfortable in their gender roles.

My parents had a very normal and loving relationship, were openly affectionate with each other, and I was raised in a two-parent home along with my sister. Dad was a perfectly 'normal' male role model who taught me to fish and to go bowling and to do my own car repairs and other 'guy stuff'. The only 'abnormal' things in how I was nurtured was that my mother firmly believed both of her kids should be able to run all aspects of their own households, and shouldn't need to be dependent on someone else to cook and sew and clean their home for them. So my mom made sure that both my sister and I could cook and sew and do our own laundry and do all the other 'girl work' needed for running a home, and my sister also learned along with me all the usual 'guy stuff', like how to fix her car and do woodworking and do home repairs. Gender wasn't an issue when it came to learning skills that could help us to live our lives. Also, my father was somewhat homophobic. Not the sort who would rant against gays as being evil, but he could barely say the word homosexual. He was very uncomfortable talking to anyone about any aspects of sex. So it was my mom who gave me the talk about 'the Birds and the Bees', and who did her best to answer the questions that arose with puberty, and who made written material available to me to explain what she couldn't.

My 'inner girl' first 'said hello' when I was ten or so. As far as I can recall, at that point, aside from being taught there was nothing wrong with a boy learning to sew and cook and do laundry, I wasn't even aware of gender role choices or gay or lesbian stuff, other than the usual expectations based on birth sex. I was doing my laundry in the basement, and everyone else was upstairs and busy doing other things. I had to take a load of my mom's clothes out of the dryer to make room for mine, and I found her slips, bras and girdles 'interesting', to the point where I got undressed and tried them on. Then I quickly took them off again, finished getting my laundry going, and took mom's clothes upstairs so she could fold them and put them away. After that, occasionally I would repeat the experience of trying on mom's girl stuff from the laundry. But neither my mom nor my little sister were all that close to my clothing sizes, so I never considered actually wearing any of it for longer than just trying it on. I also didn't feel at all compelled to try to obtain any of my own girl stuff in my sizes. I do vaguely recall playing with mom's lipstick a few times back then, but no other makeup.

I didn't personally meet or know of anyone who admitted he was gay until I was 14 or 15, so no one else had influenced me to think that it was okay to think about gay sex or cross dressing. That one gay friend of the family was completely in the closet himself, and didn't cross-dress. I'm pretty sure none of his family knew his inclinations, and I would never have guessed if he hadn't admitted it to me. After one brief encounter with him though, I had to admit to myself that there were some males that I found attractive. But I flatly refused to act on any of those impulses after that, because my father would never have accepted the idea of his only son doing anything remotely gay, nor would anyone else in my family, as far as I could tell. You could definitely say that nurturing prevented me from exploring my inner girl back then.

For the same reason, I certainly wasn't going to explore wearing women's clothes, even after I moved out and was on my own. In my early 20's I had one other gay encounter, and had one bisexual male friend that I almost confessed my feelings of affection to, but other than that I remained functionally straight. I tried very hard to live by the gender roles that my birth sex indicated were appropriate and acceptable. I married, fathered a child, and had a fine monogamous relationship with a woman, that lasted over 30 years, until her untimely death this year. We raised our daughter to accept that what mattered about others was their behavior and character, and not their gender roles or sexuality. She was raised to be tolerant of the differences of others.

In my very late teens and early 20's, a few years before I married, my 'inner girl' surfaced again, in the form of my choosing to play several female characters in role playing games like Dungeons and Dragons. I'd create characters of both genders, and found I had a lot of fun playing a girl and making her talk and act as much as I could like a real girl would. That became my one outlet for my feminine aspect, and that has remained with me for the rest of my life, in various forms of roleplay in games and in on-line venues. Until 5 or 6 years ago all of that play was g-rated and non-sexual. Then some of the roleplay did start assuming a sexual nature, but I made it very clear to those that I did adult play with that the activities were only fictional play between the characters, and that in real life I was married and monogamous. My wife and daughter knew about my playing girls in those roleplaying experiences, and accepted it as an outlet for my feminine aspect.

A few years ago, after both of my parents had died, I started to explore wearing panties and other mild cross-dressing. My inner girl had been lusting after ladies boots and pretty skirts and other things for years, and I had been denying her those real-life pleasures. But with my parents gone, I decided to risk it. I admitted after a while to my wife that I was wearing panties under my male clothes, but I didn't try to take it further. She was mildly disapproving of that, but let me do it. Her lack of complete acceptance of that mild under-dressing kept me from taking it further while she was still alive.

When my wife died, I started to indulge my inner girl fully, and to open myself to the possibility of seeking a bisexual path in the remainder of my life. I was in my 50's, and it was pretty late in life to make such a change, yet I had no reasons left not to indulge myself. My 18 year old daughter by that time had admitted to me that while she wasn't yet sexually active with others, her interests weren't defined by strict gender roles. She found some girls as attractive as she found some guys, and she had several friends who were openly gay, bi or lesbian. So I felt safe coming out to her about my being bi-curious and about my interest in cross dressing, and began to do it fully, with her acceptance and support, just as she has my support to follow her heart with whatever relationships she might seek in the future, regardless of her partner's gender. She dresses as a boy sometimes while doing cosplay, so she fully understands me.

Hummm. Maybe for my daughter, it is genetic... Certainly she's been nurtured to follow her heart and make her own choices in life, with my support.

[Claire Cook]

So I did a Google search . . . you can find anything on Google and found the ever illusive Girl Lizard Brain (for all you naysayers). See photo below
Hugs
Isha

Maybe she should be our mascot! How about a name -- Liz-ette? Zarda?

[Mia Brankovic]

Isha...I only have a rudimentary knowledge concerning this issue...WOW...I bow to your intellectual superiority on this One.

I do know that it's usually not one or the other (nature/nurture) but varying degrees of both.

On a personal level (Paragraph 2, Nurture): Sexually, I'm much more relaxed/calm. Also, could you direct me to, or write a thread on BSTc (If I may request that)?

Thank you for a wonderful read, I learned much!
Mia

[Alice Torn]

As Gomer Pyle would say, "Gawwwlly!", and Jed Clampett would say, "I need to do some cipherin." Makes some sense to me. I heard many moons ago, the women have a larger hypothalamas , and can use both sides of their brains, at the same time easier than most men, multi task easier. I would like a brain x-ray and see if mine is similar size, as a bachelor, with no mate, have multitasked often.

[Ressie]

I wish I had the time and patience to read long posts like this. I don't read very fast so I always skip reading more than a couple of short paragraphs.

[Tracii G]

I have to ask why torture yourself with all this analyzing ?

[mariehart]

Very interesting and coherent comments. I always feel the nurture argument falls apart very easily. When you consider that many of us who are TS had conventional male upbringings. Yet we reject our maleness and wish to live or dress/act as females even in overtly patriarchal cultures. Now nurture may have part to play in encouraging fetishes and other sexual behaviour. That's easy to see. But I believe many of those who cling to the nurture explanation are more interested in the social or political implications. Gender neutral toys for children as an example. A pointless effort IMHO.

So for me it's largely nature with I think hormones having a large part to play, particularly when it comes to being TS. The issue of pre natal hormones I read about previously. One explanation suggested that stress in the Mother during the foetus early development can interrupt the flow of hormones that dictate a male or female brain development. I doubt if the science is fully settled on the point but in my own case my Mother became pregnant before she married my Father. Bearing in mind this happened in Ireland during the 1950s at a time when unmarried pregnant women where put in Mother and baby homes and often had their child taken away from them for adoption. She must have been under considerable stress at the time not that she ever spoke about it. Could that have an impact on my development? Possibly.

There may be a genetic aspect but I think hormones are the most likely culprit.

On the other hand I do think the differences between male and female are not as great as many of us believe. The balance of ying and yang as it were. My own belief is that all of us have both male and female characteristics. But because culturally we have tended to separate the male and female roles there's a tendency to assign certain behaviours or interests as male or female. Now with gender equality being high on the agenda. Women are often encouraged to take on formerly male roles. But the opposite is not true. Often professions that were male dominated are now dominated by women. For example Secretaries or Personal Assistants used to be a predominantly male job. Now it's largely female and as such is avoided by men. I came across this myself I started off in a job as an office clerk in an Engineering department. But as time went on they only hired people who could type which meant girls. So the role became largely female. I was the one and only male in that role and as befits the cliché an effeminate one at that. I had to learn how to type and effectively became a PA to an Engineer. No men would take on the job anymore. The medical profession is another example. It's not just nurses, many of the background jobs have become female dominated. It may be only a matter of time before most Doctors are women. Once a job is seen to dominated by women most men avoid it because of course most men don't want to be seen as effeminate or gay even if they might be so inclined. Culturally any perception of being anything less than masculine is still not very acceptable. So it's ok to have a girl who might be considered a tomboy but a boy doing 'girl' things is not.

You can even see it with the reaction of wives to finding out their husband is a crossdresser. They're shocked as they stand there in their trousers and business suit having just come home from their job in a male dominated profession. 'I married a man' they cry 'not a woman. Are you gay?' they ask, without a hint of irony. In our culture women are encouraged to take on formerly male roles, professions and behaviour. They can wear men's clothes without any comment from anyone. But again the reverse is not true. We must keep the masculine mask at all times. Not for us are the 'pretty things'. Many men are comfortable with that but a significant proportion are not. But they cannot express anything feminine in their day to day life. So they secretly wear women's clothes which gives permission to express their true selves. That in my opinion is why many CDs have a clear and discrete separation of male and female personas. It's a way of coping with restrictions placed on men by both women and our society.

That's the way I see it.

[Isabella Ross]

Isha...interesting. I'll have to do some more reading about your theory. However, I think Alice-V made a great point: to the best of my limited knowledge, genetics and hereditary traits are not necessarily the same. We're all quick to agree that all of our physical traits result from genetic expression. Why is it such a stretch to extrapolate this to our mental and personality traits? One other thing: you and several others have made the argument that, "There's no history in my family of crossdressing or transgenderism, so therefore the answer can't be hereditary." Really? I successfully concealed this from every person on the planet for three decades or more. Many of you have done the same. You're telling me that you don't think that your ancestors might have been able to achieve the same thing, and taken their secret to the grave? Particularly in a much more conservative era? Come on.

[bridget thronton]

A very elegant post Isha. Another dimension of this discussion that has fascinated me is reincarnation (while I am not a general believer in reincarnation - it does hold some interesting concepts for me - perhaps not letting go of having been a woman in a former life or prepping for that role in the next). So watch things to read but have not found a lot.

[Allisa]

WOW!, Okay while waiting for my wash to get done and my nail polish to totally dry, I believe in some way (my experience) that nurture is a part of how I developed my GLB, while living in an all female(strong mother, provider) household I was exposed to the teachings of how to be a proper woman(60's) and as my mother taught my sisters the ways of womanhood and this constant exposure was stored away, for now I feel as comfortable and natural to express my GLB. Although I acted and did the natural male things as a boy and a man( the nature part) I was still inherently both genders it just took a long time for my MLB to catch up(mature) to my GLB, which I can now live as a one person being. As far as dressing that is nurture by way of advertising in the media, to which we are exposed every waking moment of our lives, as to how to dress and act in our physical gender thus the confusion and all the other negative feelings one encounters on there journey thru life. My only regret is that I could not totally accept my GLB sooner. Well got to go finish my household chores the day is never long enough.