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Thread: A question to those who have had your name officially changed

  1. #1
    I've made it and love it Jennifer-GWN's Avatar
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    A question to those who have had your name officially changed

    I'm thinking ahead and trying to determine at what point in your transition did you have your name changed? Was there a particular criteria (official or personal) that you needed to reach before beginning the paperwork. Did you take a staged approach getting certain simpler thing covered first like having a credit card in your femme name?

    I realize there may be differences on the official side so my question is more targeted to your personal milestones or criteria.

    I'd really appreciate your insight. I've spent the weekend thinking about this and something my Dr asked me on Friday which really caught me off guard related to my transition timeline.

    Cheers... Jennifer
    Last edited by Nigella; 12-15-2014 at 01:34 PM. Reason: The TS forum is gender neutral
    I am who I am... I'm happy...I mean truly to the bone happy...and at peace with myself for the first time ever. I'm confident and content as the woman I am.

  2. #2
    Just Saying Hi Traci Elizabeth's Avatar
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    I filed for my name change exactly one year from the date I started my RLE and have never looked back.

    If you are going to change your name, think long and hard what name you want because it will stick with you the rest of your life.


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  3. #3
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    I did everything rather recently. I was full time outside of work for some time. I ended up changing my name about 1 1/2 months before changing at work as I wanted to have time to change my name, get a passport in hand, and then start changing all of my identification. It all went fast enough that I was done a few weeks before my work date. It wasn't a biggie to me as my check was direct deposit, so they were sending it to an account and not a name. It didn't really affect anything else. I would advise to assess your situation before doing this early, but for me it worked.

  4. #4
    I've made it and love it Jennifer-GWN's Avatar
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    Thanks Sue... I'm certainly not ready to pull the trigger yet. lots to think about and probably in line with your comment Traci Elizabeth. The work piece is probably the piece that I really need to consider.

    Thanks...
    Cheers... Jennifer
    I am who I am... I'm happy...I mean truly to the bone happy...and at peace with myself for the first time ever. I'm confident and content as the woman I am.

  5. #5
    I <3 kittys Jenessa's Avatar
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    Decided I had to start. Saw my Dr. and started HRT that day, 2 months later I went before the judge and petitioned for change of name (1st, middle and last) and it was granted. I'm still not full time (work is not accommodating, but I understand and am ok with it) doing electrolysis and saving for surgeries, never been happier in my life and I have no regrets of the path I'm taking.

  6. #6
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    After I started living full-time, people seemed to inadvertently forget to address me with the female verison of my male name, sometimes, (and some deliberately refused to address me by other than my male name), and so, when I was confident I would not likely turn back, (detransiton, in other words), I went ahead,. It was about a year or so after I went full-time. By then I was already asking everyone to use my new name, even before it was official.

    One problem I ran into, was when I wanted to join a new church and be made an official member, (I had been run out of my old church), I needed the name change to be official and legal,. Fortunately it came in, a week or so, before the ceremony to have the next group of people inducted, was to take place. Of course I could have simply continued to attend the new church without formally joining.
    Last edited by Beth-Lock; 12-17-2014 at 12:42 PM.
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  7. #7
    What is normal anyway? Rianna Humble's Avatar
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    I did my name change on the first day of my RLE. I was about to transition on the job and did not want the embarrassment of having a male name.
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  8. #8
    Silver Member Angela Campbell's Avatar
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    that's what I did too. My appearance had changed enough that my ID was not being accepted so well, I knew it was time. I had ffs, changed name, came out at work all in a few weeks time. I was full time outside of work for quite a while before that.

    There has never been any question about if it was the right thing to do, or whether I might need to go back.....there was nothing to go back to. If you have doubts, hold off and try to make sure.
    Last edited by Angela Campbell; 12-15-2014 at 05:36 AM.
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    For me it was when I dressed 24/7, but before realising I was TS
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  10. #10
    Just A Simple Girl Michelle.M's Avatar
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    Name change is one of the most individualized things one can do in a transition, and your hows and whys are going to be unlike anyone else’s.

    In my case, my transition began about 15 months before I left the Army, and I changed my name about 3 months before I left active duty. I began RLE the day after I got back to Texas and have been Michelle both legally and experientially from that day hence.

    You know what happens when you change your name? Nothing, until you pull the trigger on all of those various things you need to change. So, I signed the lease and got my utilities (and everything else that required a credit check) under my old name, and once I was all set I changed my various accounts to my new name.

    This is not that hard to figure out. Just do what works for you and it’ll all shake out just right.
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  11. #11
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    I am trying to get it now. Here you have to have your fingerprints by the FBI and the Colorado bureau before you can petition. I have the CBI, it took two weeks...going on 7 weeks for the FBI. I have to have it all done within 90 days of the background so I am beginning to worry. I started about a year after started hormones. In Colorado anyone can change their name at any time for almost any reason. Gender markers? That's a whole nuther story
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  12. #12
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    I changed my name 6 months after SRS. My credit cards only had a first initial before that.

  13. #13
    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
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    I changed my name about eight months into being full time. I just got sick of the bank saying I had the wrong card, and the dentists office calling my male name in a busy waiting room. It was just time.
    The day after my name was legal I changed all my ID to female.

    Jennifer- different offices need differently worded Drs. letters, and personal letters. I sent a couple of wrong ones that were returned. If you want copies of all the right ones to show your Dr. Let me know, and I'll send along.
    Last edited by I Am Paula; 12-15-2014 at 04:18 PM.

  14. #14
    Aspiring Member PaulaAnn's Avatar
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    Afternoon; I'm in the last few steps of my name change;received word today that my gender marker has been changed on my Drivers Licence and Health care plan I.D. I have my official name change certificate,credit card changed ,banking, pensions,and revenue agency all informed.The last thing I have left to do is drive into the city and upgrade my social insurance data. It's been 22 months since I started my RLE.It was time to be me ,totally. It is such a rush to legally sign my name as Paula. I didn't do the name change in steps ,but just set the process in motion one day....I like to start a project,BAM! and won't rest easy until it is completed ;and usually want everything done yesterday with no screwups.Paula and patience ,'tis like oil and water.I do believe the whole process has taken some two months since Oct.'14,but one item remains.
    PaulaAnn
    " I'm learning to fly"..............(Tom Petty).

  15. #15
    I've made it and love it Jennifer-GWN's Avatar
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    Thanks all. .. What seems to be resonating that it's ok to exist as your female self for a good amount while maintaining your male identification (vs identity/persona) without too much greef. I did stop by the bank today to get a companion Visa card. No problem that will be 50$ and both you and Jennifer will have to come in and sign some papers. Dough��. I think I'll ask my dr for a letter then go have a word with the branch manger. I'd just be happy at this point with a cc with Jennifer's name on it given I rarly have to use any other form of card aside form my passport and Jennifer's too expensive right now God forbid I let her travel.

    Cheers... Jennifer
    Last edited by Jennifer-GWN; 12-15-2014 at 08:18 PM. Reason: Bad auto correct
    I am who I am... I'm happy...I mean truly to the bone happy...and at peace with myself for the first time ever. I'm confident and content as the woman I am.

  16. #16
    Member Kimberly Kael's Avatar
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    As you've observed, there's a lot of variability in the legal question of what is required for a name change. Leaving that aside, my personal line in the sand was having everything lined up elsewhere in my life. I was out to family and friends, and had a transition timetable agreed on with HR at work. I was comfortable with committing to a permanent change in my identity after talking it over extensively with my wife and therapist. I had chosen my name with care with feedback from those closest to me. I had signed my new name a zillion times for practice and liked the signature I would now be applying to legal documents. I knew what additional steps I'd need to take to update legal documents and had paperwork prepared by my doctor and therapist to submit where required.

    I finally put in my legal petition to change my name about 2-1/2 months before it would become official at work. That gave me time to apply for all my new ID and make a healthy start on financial records and so forth. I would have everything I needed to change everything at work all at once to reflect my new identity.

    It almost worked smoothly, but as it happened there was one last-minute trip for work that got complicated. All work related travel had to be booked by the company using the name I was employed under, which didn't match the ID I still had to present at the airport during those few weeks. Ultimately HR had to intervene to apply for an exception to the normal travel rules and allow me to book my own flight. So it wasn't s big deal, but it was more complicated than usual.
    ~ Kimberly

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  17. #17
    Aspiring Member Veronica_Jean's Avatar
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    Jennifer,

    I tried to time my name change with when I started RLE. I had informed everyone on the job and like a few others didn't want to be a female at work, with a male name.

    Even more unexpected was my gender marker approval for my driver's license arrived on the day of my name change hearing. So all in a matter of a few hours I had a new female legal name, and an 'F' on my drivers license. The Social Security board even took the paperwork I used for my driver's license and changed my gender marker with them as well.

    I did have an issue getting my military contractor ID changed, That took at least 8 months and the only thing that got it done was one day they almost refused to let me in the gate.

    Veronica

  18. #18
    Swans have more fun! sandra-leigh's Avatar
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    I have never had anyone indicate that my male ID was improper. A very small number of times (twice?) someone was visibly surprised by my male ID, gave me a look over, and handed it back without comment. Basically "I don't pass" (but people leave me alone.)

    My biggest single impulse towards a legal name change at the moment is perhaps not "mature", but it would be so that my ex (it would be difficult for outsiders to tell we've broken up) would use my real name instead of my male name -- then only time she uses Sandra is as a kind of sneer.

    As I was getting to the point of seriously considering a legal name change, my province proposed changes to gender recognition law. I held off doing anything then so that I wouldn't have to get my birth certificate amended twice (in both cases sending my ID to the province I was born in.) That law was passed and given Royal Assent in the late spring of 2014, but as yet no date has been set for it to come into effect. I have not been able to determine when it will even be known as to when it will come into effect, and frankly I am worried that if a date has not been set by the time of the next provincial election, then the new government (likely to be a conservative party) will deal with the issue by simply not setting a date, escaping from the Human Rights lawsuits by saying "We're working on it".

  19. #19
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    Official -
    Spent about $300 total. about 3 months between initial filing and final date.
    Had to run an ad in a regular-circulating paper one day a week for three weeks announcing the name change. I picked some paper that not may people even read. This had to happen before my court date.

    Had to have some paperwork but it wasn't that bad.

    I think the only legal criteria had something to do with not having felonies or something. I don't remember the specifics on that cause I have none anyways.

    The biggest thing to think about here is exactly what you want your name to be. This requires a lot of soul searching. Everything else is pretty easy.

    AFTER that name change is when the real work begins. Changing SS card, DL, names on accounts, etc. And guess who gets to do all that?
    It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.

  20. #20
    . Aprilrain's Avatar
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    I started hormones in February of 11, I changed my name and documentation including gender in July of 11. I was on a mission, nothing was going to stop me or slow me down.

  21. #21
    Member Cheyenne Skye's Avatar
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    My experience: I had been on HRT for about a year and a half and felt that the changes were getting to hard too hide at work. (Turns out I was mistaken.) I figured if I was going to come out at work, I might as well make it all legal. I found a local law clinic that works with the LGBT community. They filed all the paperwork for me pro bono and even got my filing fees waived. After they got the ball rolling with the court, I had the talk with my boss. As it turned out, work took longer to make the documented change than the court. In the interim, I made a list of everyone else I needed to notify. I started on them after I had the court decree in hand.
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