Consequences of coming out to my mother

[SusanaO]

Jorja,

You bring up an interesting point. After reading every response, it seems ReineD's is the average of all the responses.

I will give you ladies an update later

[Genifer Teal]

I don't think the photo is a good idea. See how she reacts first. No need to put a vision in her head. You can't unsee what has already been seen. My mom found out and we had a very brief conversation. She basically said I never want to talk about it unless you are never doing it again. She lived in a very different time. She will never understand. She still loves me and treats me the same. :-)

[Dianne S]

No need to put a vision in her head.

While I agree starting with a photo is not such a good idea, I'm not sure about not showing yourself ever. After I told my mother, I think she had all kinds of ridiculous visualizations of me as a woman. When I finally showed up as Dianne for the first time, she stared at me for a few seconds and then said: "My God, you look like a girl!"

Sometimes reality can be less disturbing than imagination.

[daviolin]

I always wished I would of come out to my mother. I think she would of embraced it. To bad for me. I never did. Daviolin

[binair10]

Susana, Your mother already has a good idea that you are a dresser...believe me.
Ask her round for coffee, and leave the photo lying around. When she makes a comment on how Girly you look, you can always say it was taken when you were going to a Halloween party. But if she wants to see you dressed..do dress sensibly.
Then you can take it from there.
Mothers are not stupid. Mothers love their children.
Julie.

[DonnaT]

I imagine your mother isn't so conservative that she'd have a negative response to learning you are a CDer.

When I showed my mom a picture, it was an avatar photo I had accidentally left on the camera. She was quite accepting, however, and has gifted me with several of her things.

So, you might start with a head shot photo, and discuss makeup.

[SusanaO]

That reminds me: she actually has seen in as a girl in pictures from two different halloween parties (she found it amusing). But, that was before I was wearing nail polish etc., and the makeup was more of a drag style. She hasn't seen me how I like to see myself as a woman.

[CONSUELO]

I agree with the advice from ReineD. Tell her rather than surprise her with a picture. That can follow later.