Your Feminine Side.....are you in touch......

[mykell]

do you feel you have one....do you think others do....
how you relate to the situation at the time.....
a comment in a conversation....
how someone is treating someone else in front of you....
how you treat someone depending on the folks you are with at the time....

soooo just recently i came to a realization with an incident that i acted more as a man than what i believe i normally do when here,
my perceived balance was askew....
like others here for me i relate to myself as myself, no difference between the fabric or shoe i may be wearing....

so what say you ? do you feel you have a feminine side.....male side....balance....or a sliding scale....

dont believe that one even exists....

[Kate Simmons]

All of my feelings are under one aegis, so I talk the same way all the time regardless of what I look like.

[AllieSF]

No, I do not think nor feel that I have two sides in the sense of different personalities and being. I am me. I am a little different when dressed en femme, but all the basic me stuff is still there and normally shining out in both modes. I understand that others might feel very differently about this, but in my case I am me always regardless of how presenting.

[Jodi]

I do not have a femme side. I just dress in the clothes and try to act the part.

Jodi

[scarletcd]

I have a feminine side but really it's no diff than my normal side

[Closeted Kat]

I also don't feel like i have sides. I'm the same all the time, perhaps my "male" side and "female" side just fused into one great whole!
-kat

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Mikell, I'm the same inside just the outside trimmings change.

[MsVal]

In my case, I started a bit on the 'M' side of the scale, and as time passed, slid considerably past center, well into the 'F' side. It is not clothing dependent.

Best wishes
MsVal

[Jamie Christopher]

I really feel feminine at times when I'm dressed and feeling pretty, a bit of perfume, what's not to love? Not when I'm behind the wheel motoring though....watch out.

Jamie

[Lauri K]

For me I live on the feminine side of the scale which is OK with me, it's where I feel my best.

[DorothyElizabeth]

I have been told many times, by many different people, that I seem to be more caring and empathetic than most men. So I guess I am the same, no matter what wrapper I am in. What's the nursery rhyme line? "Friday's child is loving and giving." Well - I was born on a Friday, so I guess I fall right into the mold.

[Ineke Vashon]

About 3 ½ years ago, in casual conversation with a then girlfriend, I mentioned that I seemed to have a stronger feminine side than an average male (she did not react negatively to that by the way). Although the relationship did not last for other reasons, shortly thereafter I joined this forum and, very late in life, acknowledged I was a crossdresser. Or, more accurate to me, I like to wear women's clothing. Wearing women's clothes is to me both an enjoyment, a sensual feeling and an outward expression of my inner feelings.

Ineke

[MeredithG]

I definitely relate better to women and enjoy being in group settings like Pilates. And in general I think my nature and feminine side are often perceived by others - especially women. I enjoy being seen as 'softer' !

[bridget thronton]

I liketo think I have a feminine side - but I just miss too many things they GG's do not when they talk to other people.

[Tina_gm]

I definitely have a feminine side. I relate very well to women. I have the ability to understand them better than most men. Although not as good as other women. Some things I just don't get and likely never will. I do get a lot though. I have many natural feminine mannerisms. I say natural because I do not have to think about doing them, they occur on their own without me thinking about it. I have to work to cover them up at work or social functions, when my kids are around etc etc. I am not always successful at that either.

My brain seems to be wired like a woman's in some ways. I tend to "think" like a woman in some ways and have certain emotional responses that are more like a woman's then a man's. It is not complete though, I have other traits about me that are masculine. I also "think" like a man in some ways and have certain emotional responses that are more like a man's than a woman's. I have interests and general likes that are on both ends of the gender spectrum. And I get and don't get both women and men about certain habits, likes and overall behavior. A why do they do this or like this kind of thing.

[ClosetED]

Masculine and feminine are constructs that change over time. Pink used to be a boy color. I have thoughts that most would associate with feminine side. How the social environment is set up, I may choose not to reveal it. For example, I would see a female colleague with a nice pair of shoes and would want to compliment her - but as a male at work, I can't do that. A female could. But I can do that to wife or sister or possibly daughter. So there are 2 sides, but what they are can vary by situation. a male hairstylist can do things most would say are feminine, but it is his job. Labels are tricky things …

Hugs, Ellen
(come vote on your favorite wig for me in Picture Gallery - 'which color suits me')

[Alice Torn]

I am utterly misunderstood, an enigma, trapped in a mystery, dumbfounding myself and others. Part of me is a sensitive , but a bit John Wayne like, loner guy, a stranger , fixing my old beater car, and part of me is womanish 12 step meeting person, sensitive, sharing everything. When fully dressed, (about twice a month), i feel, and look, like the lady i would like to have, or be, but i am the same person, with sensitive masculine, and feminine traits. Having lifetime depression and bipolar , which many people i know say does not exist, makes it more crazy. It really hurts when my family of origin, and others say depression, and bipolar, are make believe. I think my bipolar contributes to my masculine/females sides, too.

[Mary Poppins]

I can definitely relate more to my feminine side. I have more women friends than men. I do something that most people don't do, I listen and more feeling oriented. Embrace and be true to yourself. You have only one life to live, enjoy each day. Crossdressing makes me feel happy and that is my therapy. I have gotten more bold that I go out in public. I have grown a thicker skin.

[desertrider]

So much to think about...hence the novella...

This is actually a big part of dressing for me right now, but I'm kinda new at it. It's been my standard halloween routine for years, but this year it kinda stuck (much to my gg's chagrin - she likes hair, I hate it, we're being very open, I get positive support, but negative enthusiasm, if you know what I mean).

I'm really loving questioning all the male b/s I was born into. It's a great time to toss out any unpleasant social baggage, and I'm trying my best. I still love, i.e., having a wrench in my hand, but I'm also feeling really good on the other hand about toning down the crude jokes, macho behavior, feelings of insecurty and insufficient masculinity, etc, etc, unto the ends of the earth. I never thought about it before, but I felt kind of chained as a guy all the time. Somehow being a girl releases me from the social feeling that I'm not 'good enough' at my gender (which is funny, cause I'm definately not great at looking, feeling, and acting like a girl either). I guess now I feel like I don't *have to be* either, so there's not this iron need to be perfect at either one anymore. There are downsides of course. I'm sort of fluid around 2/3 guy maybe (now I'm bloody 'labelling' myself with a number, oh my gosh, unreal)---> so I have no problem at all going full girl dress at home, shaving everything I can cover for work, but then skipping the makeup and leaving my beard on. Now that's goofy. Even people on this forum are now going, "what's up with that?!?" (read the bearded lady post on here if you doubt my assertion). I guess I'm mostly dressing for me. I like my beard, I like wearing women's clothes and feeling and thinking more girly. Not easy square that, but it's sure easier for me than being a repressed "100%" male. (Plus I look like a freak 12yo version of one of my uncles in guy mode when I shave the beard lol. What am I to do with myself?

I do recognize a lot of my feminine thoughts are just cultural b/s too, which makes it a struggle to have confidence in them sometimes (I sometimes think girls are 'nicer', to each other, etc, then I'm like: "oh, wait, now we're in cultural fantasy land, enjoy your stay"). You can't go total reductionist on everything though - you'll wind up deciding *everything* is b/s, right? Bottom line, letting the feminine side out, instead of repressing it, is freedom. It's being alive all the way. I'm using those moments when I think, "you're being [masculine/feminine]" to be more who I want, period.

I'd always had a feminine side in my mind, but I have to say, I never knew how fun it was to let it out into my body! I *never* danced before (still haven't done it out, but I'm pretty sure I have the confidence to do it was a woman, no way as a man). I love moving my body as a woman, walking, sitting, feeling like I can put my hands on my hips, cross my legs anyway I feel like (the guy cross kills my hip joints - girls don't have exclusive license on torturing their bodies to follow social norms either obviously), etc. My inner girl is way more happy and carefree. I'm smitten with her, but is it true love? Will I just wind up alone & androgynous? It's an adventure I'm willing to find out. I'm done being afraid at this point in my life. The whole world is so dark right now, I feel like I have a pink sun beam coming out of my chest when I let go. I plan to nurture it while trying not to alienate all the amazing people in my life who are comfortable walking a more travelled path.

D

[Jackie Meyer]

I have been told by my close friends that my female persona comes out when dressed. This is strange because I am not aware of this change. I don't force it on. It comes natural I guess. Clothes are a byproduct of how we act I think. Heels and a skirt will most certainly make you move differently. Long nails makes you touch things differently. This is in my case and my opinion of course. How I would act is a situation presents itself...only time will tell.

[Teresa]

Mikell,
How much of a feminine side I have is hard to say, I posted a thread a while ago about not having the same the same interest and enthusiasm for the male jobs around the house ! I asked whether I was becoming lazy or was the feminine part taking over ? All I know is I enjoy so many aspects of it and would love to be more open with that part of me because it genuinely makes me happy ! I guess I haven't managed to find a balance yet !

[Kristyn Hill]

I really feel both sides make me who I am. As stated by most everybody already, clothing does make me move and feel a little different as each situation is manipulated by my outward appearance.

[CD_Princess1234]

Then could I ask .... What makes you cry or don't you have thoughs moments

[heatherM]

My answer to this is horribly complicated and has been from the time I realized I was differnt, 5 or 6 I guess and its been a battle of wills ever sense, wish we would have had the internet when I was young.I was born this way, have done extensive research on the issue and its not an isolated incident.
So I guess after all the BS, trouble, soul searching, genetic research, therapy, failed relationships and hardship Heather is just part of me I can't drink or drug away, I will never children, or be able please a women in the conventional sense nor am I gay.
She said one day many years ago why do act so fem sometimes, my reply was, that's not the act, all that macho stuff is the act to give the world what they need so I can survive.

[kimgirl]

For me, I have my side. I guess it's an amalgam of male and female. How much is each, I have no idea, I'm just going with the flow. My wife said she always liked the way I have my feminine side as well as my male side. Does it change when I dress, I don't think so, I'm just being me.

The mix of both sides works for me. For example, this afternoon I was out the back chopping logs and trying to get the chainsaw working (as usual - I just don't have the "wrist action" to start it first time), then I came in had a bath, lots of bubbles. After dinner we sat down to watch a film with Josh Brolin and Kate Winslett (can't remember the name of the film) but it's when he's an escaped convict. At the end of the film I just cried. I wasn't dressed this evening, so just a pair of jeans and tee shirt.