going back to the initial post, it does not sound as if any of the people there were being mature or particularly friend-like in their actions. Perhaps they were drunk?
going back to the initial post, it does not sound as if any of the people there were being mature or particularly friend-like in their actions. Perhaps they were drunk?
A Goth chick for a flatmate- I'd be so screamingly jealous of her that that definitely wouldn't work for me. Plus she'd get sick of me wearing her clothes.
I am pleased that you've turned the feelings into anger- you have every right to be angry at these miserable people.
Sydney?? Surely you can find someone who lets it all hang out, but still pays the rent on time? Better chance there than anywhere else in Oz I'd think.
Good on ya- join a rifle range, take up parachuting- anything loud and dangerous.
I used to have a short attention spa
If I were in your situation as far as her telling others I would handle like this:
If a guy says something like my wife told me (insert comment here) say " huh what? Thats crazy why would I do that?
If a girl friend of your ex's mentions something say "first I have heard about it" and pass it off as if it was nothing.
This way she looks like she is lying trying to get back at you and sounds like bitch for saying such things.
By acting likes its nothing or just plain silly most friends will think she is just trying to start trouble.
Last edited by Tracii G; 01-27-2015 at 09:04 PM.
AD,Originally Posted by AccidentalDresser
Don't get me wrong, if you don't care what others think then you are ahead of the curve. I recommended damage control because your OP read like you were going to loose friends and this seemed to bother you. However when I say damage control, I mean educate your friends that you are the same person . . . just the presentation changes.
Hugs
Isha
Ok so from what I have gathered from your last posts it should go a little like this.
Friend: "My wife and I heard blah blah blah"
Me: "Is that so? Well did you also know I do a cracking version of Dueling Banjos on the Ukulele while piloting my Alien Space Craft over Parliament House on Wednesdays"
Friend: "Well um......I mean"
Me: "Here get comfy in these tights and wear this blouse with it, the blue should really bring out the color of your eyes"
Friend: (long awkward silence)
Me: "Well thanks for stopping in, sorry you can't stay but I really have to get back to painting the roses red before the queen gets here. Oh and here take some Frozen Lemons home with you"
Sorry I am just in a weird and happy funny mood today and some of your comments just make me smile.
Thanks girls, you are all awesome.
Xxxx
God I hate people. This happened to me too, 30 years ago. Told all my friends, I only had one left after that. And he was "iffy" on it. You CAN and WILL find new friends. You cannot become bitter. And if asked about it, feel free to mention she was the one who got you into it.
One of the things I like about these posts is that after comments were made you have replied again, and filled in more details. Here is what I think:
If a discussion comes up you can point out "You know, at some point nearly everyone has tried on something from the opposite sex. Some liked it - some didn't. Some admit to it - many don't. When your SO encourages you to try something and says they like it, says it is sexy, shares their clothes with you, and has you pose for photos that excite them - they are demonstrating they like it and enjoy it, too. But when they tell others, and tell it like it is shameful - they forget the part that they liked it, and encouraged it, and were a participant in it, so if it is so shameful - they are shameful, too. So the real question is 'were they lying when they said they liked it and participated in it together? Or are they lying now when they say they don't?' Either way they are liars, and you can take that any way you want." (Don't memorize my words, just use the gist of it, if you want. Or not.)
Or you can say something like "Well, Elton John has done okay with his crossdressing - maybe I will hit it big, too."
Or you can say something like "Well, so-and-so has really helped me be ready for Halloween early this year", and then laugh.
Or you can say something like "Lots of people cross dress, and I am not the only crossdresser you know - though I may be the only one you "know" you know?"
Or you can say "What kind of woman has a relationship with someone, becomes intimate with them, and then uses it against them? If she wanted out she could have just said so, and left. I am so glad I found out about her before we got married. Can you imagine what it would be like to live a lifetime with someone who back-stabs you? And the divorce - OMG! She has saved me a lifetime of pain and trouble by showing what a b_ _ _h she is before we married. I just wished she had shown her true self sooner, so I would not have wasted so much of my time with her."
Regardless of how much you want to share with your friends (if you even want to keep them) about your current status on dressing, I think this piece would be something to lead with. If you're close to the woman who felt you up, I would start with her and see just how far it's spread. Of course, since her confidence could also just be nosiness, you may not get the best response.
If your ex fiancé was excited about your dressing and is then misrepresenting the situation, I would hope that your mutual friends would understand.
Sorry!
You have some great friends there.
Just stick it up them for mine.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Hell-o AD,
Don't jump to any conclusions, without knowing the truth. If you think word has gotten out, ask your fiancé, it is the only way to really know.
I have a female neighbor who is somewhat touchy also, she will almost always feel my abs, or waist.
She knows nothing about my CDing. (As far as I know anyway)
I hope your female friend was just trying to be touchy, feely in a friendly manner.
Much Love,
Kristyn
I smile because you are my friend, and
I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it!!!
Going to try and talk to the X tomorrow night or over the weekend to find out if she really wants to call it quits and who she has told what.
She needs to man up and face me though instead of avoiding the situation.
A work colleague brought up an interesting side point today. She said her avoidance may be a sign of her own guilt and it's possible she could have something to hide.
My work friends don't know about my CD so they think the X's actions are a result of her cheating on me. I suppose it's a possibility. I really hope not though.
Posting Permissions
