From a GG's perspective

[~Joanne~]

All too often the responses are so quick to diagnose the CDer as on a one way train to transitioning, that it is an ever growing monster from which no one can escape. This would scare the hell out of me if I had come here with no knowledge trying to decide if I can handle it.

I agree with 100% on this statement and it does happen an awful lot here. When I first told my SO how far down the rabbit hole this goes (because she sorta knew but didn't which is a long story), I asked her that she came to me if she had questions and I would do my best to answer them as honestly as possible.

I did not tell her she couldn't come here and do some reading but I explained that if she did, she would find a whole bunch of different scenarios, with each sister being different and her needs also being just as different. I didn't want her to think because of all the transitioning talk that I was eventually going to go that route myself but for an SO to just come here on her own to research this CDing? she surely will walk away with the wrong ideas.

Just today I read posts complaining about limits, begging for acceptance, talking about how you cannot ever escape dressing and it will always spiral and the world doesn't understand and wives are unfair and and and

I also agree with the some of this. If your SO isn't accepting of this, sadly, she probably never will be. Sure you can be in a DADT relationship but I always sort of saw that as continuing the lie.

As for limits, I have always had a problem with this. When two people enter into a marriage or relationship, it's suppose to be like a partnership. The good, the bad, and the ugly.....together. Not one lording over the other. When that happens there is a huge lack of respect happening there that needs to be communicated.

Now the part I disagree with is the "you cannot ever escape dressing", this is a very valid statement because it is true. You can't. You may be able to put it away, purge, and everything else to bury it but it will always come back to the surface no matter how hard you try to suppress it, and suppressing it is very unhealthy. Bottling things up is never a good thing, you become an unbearable time bomb....and that is never good for any relationship.

yet you are either completely intolerant of the feelings of your SO that is staying by your side but insisting on DADT, limits or boundaries, SERIOUSLY?

For me, and I speak for myself here, I would never let my SO treat me like a child. ever. I think I find the "insisting" part of this statement disturbing. You could sit like two grown people and talk about a compromise and if you both agree with it then fine but no one should ever go through their lives being lead by anyone else or being told what they can or can not do when the thing being done harms absolutely no one. If it is harmful that's another story but CDing isn't.

How would you feel if Your husband put limits or boundaries on you? I promise you wouldn't like it. We talk about women crossdressing all the time and how no one says a word about it.What if he did? What if he said "oh hell no you can't get that shirt from the men's section, would you anyways? My SO buys shirts for herself all the time in the men's section, she never asks permission to do so, why should I?

I see the vast majority talk about how dressing makes you FEEL, yet you selfishly want to invalidate the feelings of an SO, child, friend, parent or other family?!?
Yeah a perfect world no one would care or have any feeling whatsoever about what you wear, but that ain't the world we live in, so most likely your SO or whoever else is going to have an opinion and feelings about it, so deal with it. You don't get to decide how people feel, just like they don't get to decide what you prefer to wear.

I won't lie, this statement lost me a bit. There is a double standard in there. So your saying that our feelings don't matter but we should respect what others are feeling as if their feelings are more important than ours? We can't decide how they feel but they can decide how we feel? come on now....Your opening statement was SO powerful then you get to this paragraph and it becomes a complete mess.

If you want someone to respect your choice of clothing you also have to respect their comfort level! I mean seriously, I prefer to not wear clothes at home, but my 4 teenagers feel more comfortable when I do, so I do! It isn't that they don't accept that I like being naked, it just makes them uncomfortable! I could seriously go on and on about this but I think you get my point.

Actually no, it's like comparing apples and oranges. We are still clothed regardless of the clothing we chose to wear, we aren't running around naked. Matter of fact, I wear more when I "dress" than when I am in my everyday attire.

The whole comfort level stems from a bunch of ideas from those who think they are better than us and have instilled the idea of what is right or wrong throughout our whole lives, which we should just accept and never question.

If you truly love your SO and respect her, give her the option to accept you, do not force her to live a lie, it is selfish and just wrong. If you think she wouldn't accept you or it would end the relationship, well, newsflash, it shouldn't be. What I mean is, if she doesn't love and respect you enough to accept you, why are you there?!?! I get it, you love her, but really, honestly, are either of you truly living a life of love if is full of lies? Imagine for just one minute how she would feel if tomorrow you were released from your mortal coil, what would that mean to her. Yeah yeah I hear you, but my hidden stash has a note explaining everything. She will be fine. Soooooo if you think she will be fine, TELL HER! I mean even the most accepting person in the world would have questions after finding that note but you are denying her the ability to ask ANYTHING, yet she will absolutely question EVERYTHING! If my SO hid it from me and I found a note and stash of female clothing I would wonder had I lived and loves a lie? Did he really love me? Was he gay? Why didn't he tell me? Did he think so little of me? The list of questions goes on and on

Stand up and be judged. That's how I read this.

This isn't a cakewalk for us. We have lived with this since a young age, it goes back to being fed what is right or wrong, we have been fed that this is wrong behavior. That it is abnormal behavior. If it was you, because there are FTM CD's, would you, after having held this secret for X number of years, be willing to just tell everyone you ever dated about it? no, you wouldn't. I promise you wouldn't. What make you seem to think that it should be "that easy" for us?

We see all kinds of people, from all kinds of lives, get crapped on just for being who they are, without the CDing, because we are living by other people standards our whole life, which was planted there from birth. So we should just tell everyone right away just to suffer the same fate? Sorry, we haven't been wired that way. It really is all a mind game on us and i think we may realize that but it doesn't make a lot of the choices we make in life any easier.

Now, I am assuming here that you are talking about a marriage and not just dating. Anyone who is dating and brings this forth is a fool. I am not saying that if you have been with someone say like six months, you shouldn't bring it up but not in the first month that's for sure.

If after you have been with whoever for awhile, you should have a good feel for what kind of person they are, If she is the vindictive type, then you should end the relationship. If she likes to gossip alot for no reason, you should probably do the same because the next person she is going to stab in the back is you. But if all is well, and if you are ready, then by all means you should.

I STRONGLY feel that you should never walk that aisle without having the talk the minute you want to propose to who ever. If you want to spend the rest of your days with this person, you have to go into it honestly. Going into a bond dishonestly is never a good thing but dating? I just don't see it.

In the end you talk alot about giving Her/Him a choice, I ask you this, who denied us our choice as to whether or not we wanted to carry this burden our whole life?

I am not saying your wrong juliette on a lot of the points you make but I do feel that some of this is one sided.

[Purple Puppy GG]

[QUOTE=Sierra_juliette;3683023]This is far from a marketing idea, nor am I trying to line everyone up in a row and call it all the same type of crossdresser. What I am saying is that it is frustrating as all heck to read so many people in this forum complain that their wife restricts them, has certain feelings about his dressing, is understanding etc, yet I have not seen one person 'stand up' and say 'she may be restricting me, requiring DADT, but she stays by my side'. I hear/read a whole lot of why cant the world accept us as we are, yet you (figuratively) do not accept your SO for how she is, accept that she doesn't want to see it, or has boundaries.


Sierra,I agree with you, on your statement a lot.....

[Sierra_juliette]

Joanne,

I think that you have absolutely misread or misunderstood some of what I posted.

So let me say this:

I never suggested dressing can be quit or put away, quite the opposite. I actually think someone who says they quit is fooling themselves, it (dressing) must be done or you will go crazy. Period. BUT it can be done respectfully. What I mean by this is that every relationship has boundaries or compromises. So no I would not be angry or tormented if my husband put reasonable boundaries on me for something.

If a SO asks you to not dress around her, not go out in public, not dress in intimate times etc, these are reasonable requests or boundaries. If she says you cannot ever do it again, then that isn't a boundary, that is a forbidding and when you need to rethink staying in that relationship.

You are fooling yourself if you think every relationship and every person doesn't already have boundaries placed on them.

Stand up and be judged? Yeah well if that is how you see it. Sure. How about be honest with the person you chose to share your life with, chances are you knew before marrying her, she deserves to know, for the reasons I have listed in many other posts so I won't repeat it again.

As for who gave you the choice? Well unfortunately it wasn't a choice, HOWEVER, does that mean you have the right to kick your feet and say the world isn't fair to me so I can be unfair to someone else.

As for one sided, yeah I am, but what many fail to see is that the side that I am on is YOURS, in favor of you being out in the open, without fear of being found out, without judgment.

The more hiding is condoned, expressed, encouraged, especially in a group where SO's can come and read; shows to many that it is shameful, guilt worthy desires. Yes unfortunately some will always hide it, but i think it is silly and close minded to think that 1) you can hide it forever 2) she won't be devastated if she finds out on her own especially after you pass away and 3) she doesn't have a clue already.

As for apples and oranges, well no. It isn't. What you choose to wear or not wear can be offensive to others. Period. Always the case. If you rather: I have a shirt that says 'Polite as F*#K' yet I don't wear it outside my home because it would make some other people uncomfortable. It is called having compassion and respect for other people. If the SO is uncomfortable with it or says it can never happen, well it may be time to evaluate what you can agree on or seek counseling or possibly end that relationship.

I could go on and on here; most of it has already been said and much of what I say seems to be taken or twisted wrongly by someone so I will end with this:

Yes, it is wrong to insist or demand anything of anyone, especially someone you are choosing to share your life with. HOWEVER, is it any different to hide it and lie about it to an SO? I say no, you have passively insisted or demanded that she live with your choices and that is just as bad if not worse in my opinion and the opinion of many, many people I know.

(For the record, this all comes from someone who lost the majority of her family, including my mother who was previously a dear close friend, because they can't accept the choices I have made in who I am married to, so I KNOW fear of losing, I know loss over CD lifestyle)

[Nadine Spirit]

Also, I understand the not forcing others to disclose, BUT especially for those who are married or have children with their SO, is it fair at all to passively force the SO to live a life she has not even had the option to live?

I am well aware that the urge will never go away, however new dressers and SOs also need to know that it does not always escalate to full time or transitioning. That is the major fear of a large majority of SOs. Yes, balance! Like cutting back on sweets, you cannot deny yourself the small cravings or you will eventually eat the whole damned cake. I get it.

I 'preach' balance to my husband all the time, dress regularly so that it no longer controls you, you control it.

OMG Sierra, this is so right on!

You know my wife joined this forum but she doesn't really participate. She gets so frustrated by the vast amount of absurdity on this site, from both male and female. But she doesn't want to call anyone out so she chooses instead to just say nothing. Which is her choice, which is fine, but I often say, if those of us with differing opinions never speak up, the other opinions are the only ones that will ever be heard.

Good for you for speaking up!

[justmetoo]

I think this is a good and interesting and enlightening discussion. I think I get a lot of what Sierra_juliette is saying, as well as some good points made by others. As pretty much a perpetually single (except for one long distance relationship that didn't work out due to numerous factors, including some of my own actions) CD I read these threads and hope to learn something from them if I ever have the good fortune to apply any lessons in "real life". I appreciate it!

[Hell on Heels]

Hell-o Sierra,
FYI. My So is aware of my CDing, but prior to her awareness I was really struggling with this
tell don't tell thing. I searched here through many threads, much like this one, only to find myself more
confused. I never did have to make that decision, a single selfie on my phone made me come clean.
So please let me see if I can make this sound senseible.
You hope that we as crossdressers all come clean with our SO's because death is looming over us.
How many "vanilla" world people actually plan ahaead for their own demise?
Who really wants to even think of such a thing?
Yeah it may seem selfish to leave this world with a lot of unanswered questions, but that
again comes back to accepting ourselves.
So quit beating the dead horse, and try to find another way to preach to us that our SO's all deserve to know
that we are doing this behind their backs. Again there is a comfort level that needs to be found within each of us before that reveal can be made.
Discussions like this that go back and forth don't help the person that is sitting on the fence., and can't decide which side to fall.
Death for all of us is certain, enjoying the love of our SO's while alive is a wonderful gift. Would you purposely throw such a gift away for anything?
I'd much rather think that my So would carry on living her life, and remember the love we shared together regardless of the unanswered questions I may have left behind.
You say you are on our side, all I'm saying is find a way to help us accept ourselves, rather than berating us for being uncaring, and deceitful.
Much Love,
Kristyn

[Nikkilovesdresses]

SJ- I'm reading a good cross section of responses here, and I'm only seeing you getting further entrenched, not really acknowledging or responding to what those who disagree say. You seem to be taking a black and white stance and shooting down all who don't buy your reasoning 100%.

That you feel intensely about this is crystal clear. What is less clear is why. I note that another gg, Purple Puppy, agrees with you, but she doesn't explain why either!

You started this thread, and you seem deeply indignant that others disagree, at least in part, with your view. That makes it a rant, not a debate. I'd like to see you expand on your view, and I'd like to see you respond without simply shouting louder, to what others have said. Your insights are of great value, but if you really want to help you need to explain the emotions that are driving them.

Right now I'm starting to wonder if on some level you feel disillusioned with the life you've chosen- I didn't realize till just now that your 2nd marriage has cost you the support of your mother and other family members- that's appalling and I'm sad to hear it. Perhaps they equate your first husband's violence with his crossdressing and fear you've walked into a replica marriage- I've no doubt they're telling you they only have your best interests at heart.

I realise I've burned my bridges in terms of personal response, but for the sake of the debate, I hope you can provide some further illumination.

[Finally Happy]

Right now I'm starting to wonder if on some level you feel disillusioned with the life you've chosen- I didn't realize till just now that your 2nd marriage has cost you the support of your mother and other family members- that's appalling and I'm sad to hear it. Perhaps they equate your first husband's violence with his crossdressing and fear you've walked into a replica marriage- I've no doubt they're telling you they only have your best interests at heart.

Thank you for the diagnoses doctor. Thanks for implying that I would harm my wife, Sierra Juliette. And that's why I don't post on these forums and just affirms why it's time to stop reading them again.

[Sierra_juliette]

Okay, let me be perfectly clear here.

I have very clearly explained my reasoning for my opinions, so much so that other responses have suggested I quit explaining them. So to accuse me of not doing so only tells me that you have either only skimmed what has been written or have no desire to actually absorb what I have written. I hear the opposition loud and clear. I get it, I honestly get it.

I was an addict, I understand having to tell loved ones a deep dark secret. I know how terrifying it is, however, as I have very clearly explained several times, however if you would like me to explain my reasons, please feel free to reread my many previous responses.

If after truly reading what I have said and explained you have a specific question feel free to ask me.

I will say that as for your last comments, well this, this is exactly the kind of diagnostic, harmful BS that I have spoken about. You have decided in your head that I am doubting my life, couldn't be further from the truth so let me explain a little something about that...

My first husband beat and almost killed me, yes, my family knew. When I met my husband (current) and found the strength to escape my abusive marriage, MY FAMILY SUPPORTED THE MAN THAT TRIED TO KILL ME, because he, they thought, was a 'normal man'. So you could not be further from the truth. Let me be extremely clear here: I have not for one moment doubted, been disillusioned or worried about my choice of husband or any other choices in my life accept perhaps the choice I made to try to post, explain and expand on how I and MANY other people feel (GG and CD) but are afraid to say.

One of my main issues is that people like to jump in and diagnose things they know nothing about, that this is supposed to be a safe place yet my husband has gotten nothing but irritated because, what I am told is the minority here, like to spout off and imply that everyone who is CDer wants to be a woman or are something more than just a man in a dress. People throw around terms like gender dysphoroa or other things that tend to blanket diagnose others.

So I sit here knowing that your insists be to do exactly what I complained about, diagnosing others, has made this couple absolutely appalled and realizing that this is forum may not be what we thought.

[Sierra_juliette]

I would/should also add, this type of attack on my motives is exactly why so few GGs post or respond. There are many GG members who have questions and insight yet are afraid to ask or post.

[NicoleScott]

But alas, I see that no matter how I explain it, I am preaching/ranting to an audience that doesn't want an opinion from an 'outsider'.

SJ, if you want your opinions respected, try presenting them without the condescension and judgement.

[Tina_gm]

SJ this forum is I believe still a good place overall. And you have several of us cders who are ok with your thread and even primarily agreeing with it.

But I almost find it amusing that there are some who feel your opinion is to inflexible because you won't agree with them, even though they won't change their own view one bit either. So, just roll with that I don't think you need to be in a battle with anyone to change anyone's view, yours or theirs.

It is so very important to get a view from someone who does accept this lifestyle. It's not just about the clothes we wear. There so much else that goes along with it. Lies, narcissistic behavior.... pity parties.... all or nothing mindsets. we can all improve more Than merely our feminine image.

[Sarasometimes]

SJ
Firstly, hats off to you for having "not for one moment doubted, been disillusioned or worried about my choice of husband or any other choices in my life accept perhaps the choice I made to try to post"! This is an amazing accomplishment for anyone I would say over the age of 30 to be able to say. To hear it from someone who has lived the life you have is extraordinary. To have chosen a first husband who nearly killed you and for you to be able to still feel that way is terrific! I wish to apologize for mine and other posts who have potentially caused you to do that as a result of what was written here.
I being just a mere crossdressing mortal who has doubted choices i have made, will look up to you after you truthfully answer these two questions and explain why you feel that way and satisfy my need to know.

Do you know more about my situation than I do? Do I know more information about your situation than you do?

Thank you and really in the scheme of things this is just a discussion.

[Tina_gm]

I don't believe it is relevant that she knows more about your situation. She has merely stated an opinion on certain aspects which are mainly about lying and deception and the destructive consequences they wield. I believe many of us should not broaden the scope of her opinion farther than what it entails. She is not putting down cding, just lies and deception mostly. cding shouldn't get a special exemption for this behavior.

[NicoleScott]

It has been discussed here many times, and without resolution, whether or not withholding information (crossdressing) is lying and deceitful. People are going to have their opinions. It seems to me that SJ has exercised her right to express her opinion but has not respected the right of others to express differing opinions as evidenced by rebutting nearly every one.
Good for SJ for surviving a tragic past, but that doesn't qualify her as an expert on the relationship between other CDers and their wives.

[MichelleDevon]

Come on, girls...why do we have to get so antagonistic towards someone who is "on our side"?

Seems to me that Sierra was voicing an opinion from her perspective as a GG. Whatever any of us may believe about who we are we are none of us GGs...unless we have some FtM members here. That essentially means Sierra comes at this whole issue from a different standpoint and therefore it looks different to her than it does to us. I believe she is trying hard to help us and encourage us to be more open in the interests of our own mental state and, hopefully, in the interests of promoting trusting relationships with our SOs in respect of our cross-dressing.

Indeed, on a different thread she has also been exploring the possibility of providing facilities to support CDs in aspects of their lives. And yet there are those here who choose to take issue with her. Most of us have more than enough angst and argument with GGs in the shape of our SOs to last a lifetime - why then pick an argument with someone who, as a GG herself, is trying positively to help us in our dealings with our SOs. Sierra levelled a number of generalised criticisms at us as a group which was perhaps unjustified but who amongst us has not done that sort of thing in the past?

So come on, those of you who are still arguing, take a step back, look at the bigger picture - here is a GG who has significant experience of cross-dressers, has embraced it fully and is trying to help us make it less of an issue in our personal lives and in a wider societal context. Sierra is a valuable helping hand for us not a saboteur trying to undermine us.

Keep up the good work Sierra, I for one both appreciate and enjoy your input.

Michelle
xxx

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Thanks for implying that I would harm my wife, Sierra Juliette.

Good grief- how on earth do you interpret my words as implying that! Here's what SJ said: "For the record, this all comes from someone who lost the majority of her family, including my mother who was previously a dear close friend, because they can't accept the choices I have made in who I am married to..."

I think if you read my words, which you quoted, more calmly you'll see I offered sympathy for JS's family situation, and only speculated about their reasons for rejecting her. As to your mutual stance re this thread, plainly any further discussion is pointless.

[Sierra_juliette]

Seriously??

I have NEVER claimed to be a professional or expert on the matter!!

If you read my original post I said I had to get it off my chest, I never said 'listen here, I am an expert, do as I say'

No! I have given you my opinions and been in turn accused of being close minded, condescending, judgmental and a dozen other things at least.

Yes, I rebut, that is what a debate is!!! Am I supposed to just roll over and say, 'oh you are right, I don't understand how someone in my shoes would feel, you absolutey deserve to lie and hide your CD habit! How silly of me to suggest otherwise!'

Just as all of you have your own opinions, and express them, I have mine and thought I could express my PERSPECTIVE (note that is the title of my post, perspective).

I have gotten many many private messages from both sides who were afraid to agree with me in this public forum for fear of getting the same accusations thrown at them.

[Amy Fakley]

Attachment 240043

Seriously though, I do appreciate your viewpoint on this stuff Sierra, you just touched a collective nerve. Someone should start another "whats the deal with pantyhose??!" thread to cool the reactor. Lol :-)

[Sierra_juliette]

You know what is evil!?! Acrylic nails and pantyhose together! It is a lose lose situation!! Talk about runs and holes!

[Tina_gm]

I wish it wouldn't even turn into such a debate. I don't think this needs to be turned into such a debate. For those who choose deception and dishonesty, accept the fate it brings you. For those who choose honesty accept the fate that brings you. No, it won't all be sunshine and roses. But at least it will be freedom. At least it will lead to a greater understanding. We should accept that there will be a different view from a different pair of eyes. It's more than just I m right and they are Wrong. We can disagree perhaps, and we can do so with respect. I hope we can maintain our hard fought integrity here.

[Sierra_juliette]

I agree that I know there will always be some who choose to hide it, but in my opinion it is very unfair to those who are not given the choice to live that lie.

If nothing else, I say at least take the time to think of as many questions as possible, ask for help in coming up with them and leave your SO a video in your stash (or a letter, video seems better to me) and answer all of the questions she may have if she finds it, especially if she finds it because she has lost you.

I don't claim to have all of the answers, life would be boring if I did. What I do have is my perspective.

When it comes down to it, whether you agree with me, disagree, think I am judging or not, I love all of you, I think some are batty as hell but I love that you have embraced something within yourself that society does not YET accept. SO at the end of the day, you may get mad at me for my opinion but just like with my friends and family, we don't have to agree for me to love and respect you.

If you take nothing else from what I post please, please, please hear this:

Consider telling your SO, even if it has to be hidden with your stash to be found later. Please stop diagnosing others in the forum, please. When you use terms like gender identity, dysphoria, or generalize the entire CD world, it alienates those who are desperately trying to find support and a safe place.

[mykell]

Seriously??

I have NEVER claimed to be a professional or expert on the matter!!

If you read my original post I said I had to get it off my chest, I never said 'listen here, I am an expert, do as I say'

No! I have given you my opinions and been in turn accused of being close minded, condescending, judgmental and a dozen other things at least.

Yes, I rebut, that is what a debate is!!! Am I supposed to just roll over and say, 'oh you are right, I don't understand how someone in my shoes would feel, you absolutey deserve to lie and hide your CD habit! How silly of me to suggest otherwise!'

Just as all of you have your own opinions, and express them, I have mine and thought I could express my PERSPECTIVE (note that is the title of my post, perspective).

I have gotten many many private messages from both sides who were afraid to agree with me in this public forum for fear of getting the same accusations thrown at them.

I would/should also add, this type of attack on my motives is exactly why so few GGs post or respond. There are many GG members who have questions and insight yet are afraid to ask or post.

hi sierra, me again,
please dont take this so personal, these are just opinions, some more passionate then others. if this was politics this scenario would be our political football.....(tell or dont tell, always turns into a springer episode) so should we punt..... give the ball back to the other team or go for it on fourth down and jam the ball up theyre ______, and so on, nobody wins really even when you score some points because this game is in perpetual overtime.

there are worse places than here on the web, (just scroll down to the bottom of the page and check the state forums and such)none better that i found.....

did we drift away from the fact that you presented that we should stand up for our beliefs and stand our ground and present ourselves in a public light, free of fear and condemnation for being who we really are and our right to be that.....ourselves......we did......sorry that happened......its was a important part of what you proposed and it got lost in all the different attributes of the group, personal feelings.....opinions, (post #21).....

you had a lot of support here too so dont loose focus.....so i hope you will share more with us.....and like i said im not the poster girl of transgender support...i hope one day we overcome the stigma's we deal with.......and with any cause this is worth the good fight.....lets concentrate on that part......im trying to get into the sunlight....

as far as the PMs its to bad they didnt share.....

[Hell on Heels]

Batty as Hell !!! What? Why single me out! Ha Ha !
Just kidding Sierre,
Really though I do agree that it's much easier to live a CD life without
the guilt of the hiding. Again risk and reward is different for all.
I think leaving a parting note and or video is not a bad idea, but there would
more than likely still be some unanswered questions.
I also agree that there are some members here that do diagnose others as
being in the fast track lane, and they shouldn't fight it, just accept your going to transition.
IMO those people are batty (not as Hell). My hope is that people are smart enough to
find that type of diagnosis from others as BS, and will find answers elsewhere.
Thanks for sharing your perspective with us. Things do lose there meaning when put into written words.
Someone's mood while reading can affect the way they hear the words in their head.
Much Love,
Kristyn

[Nikkilovesdresses]

SJ's latest, post 72 seems a sensible, workable compromise- I agree totally that a personal video is one hell of a lot better than nothing, better than just a letter. As we've seen, the written word is too easily misunderstood.

And I dislike pantyhose.