Hi jeanette, I'm only on this forum at the moment. Do you know any good dutch forums for CDing?
Hi jeanette, I'm only on this forum at the moment. Do you know any good dutch forums for CDing?
Wife is the only one who knows. I am fully confident that my parents and siblings would never understand. Just doesn't fit into their concept of reality. >.>
My wife, my 17 year old daughter and mom know about Natasha.
As well as numerous friends too. The rest of my family doesn't know...and I doubt they would accept it.
HUGS
My wife knows. I told her shortly after we started dating. Unfortunately she absolutely hates it now and it has been a huge issue for us over the years.
My parents figured it out when I was a teen I think, and they even pulled my then 'wife to be' aside and told her! Fortunately, she already knew and back then she was OK with it. Basically told them "Yes .. and ???". They never said anything to me and as far as I know newer brought it up to her again either.
Haven't told anyone else from my male life, family nor friends and have no intention to do so either. I don't see a good reason to do so as I don't think any of them would be accepting. Especially now when my wife has made it very clear that it is unacceptable.
I used to have a great group of friends in the CD community and had some very close TS friends too. I am afraid I made my self disappear some years ago and cut the connections.
I did have one very interesting friendship once. I used to travel to the UK a lot, and somehow got to know this older couple. We met somewhere at a sightseeing spot in England and got chatting. I have visited with them a number of times since and they were just the sweetest old couple with many good stories to share from a long happy life.
They only ever saw me as Suzie and I dont think they ever knew I was not exactly female! Certainly never treated me as anything but a female friend.
But, I went Under Ground and lost touch with everybody. Back in my shell now.
- Suzie
Only my wife knows. She is supportive and understands my need to dress. I really don't need anyone else to know, so don't pursue telling.
My parents and siblings know I did't ask them to keep it secret so if they tell anybody outside the family circle the word may spread like a wildfire, to be honest I really don't care since I started to change my physical appearance
Hi Alambi, I know of a few Dutch forums but not on them as they are all gay and sex orientated. That's why I felt so glad when I found this one recently, only wish I had discovered sooner. Great forum with serious topics and serious CD'ers
To everyone else, thanks very much for making me feel so welcome and all your stories and advice.
Such a poignant topic to return to again and again!
My current situation entails living alone, so I have the freedom to dress and decorate as I please. I felt like I had to "tone down" my living room and kitchen decorations, for when guests come over. My office and especially my bedroom would be considered women's rooms by any "normal" standards, so I keep those doors closed when I have company over.
So on the one hand I have never had to "hide" my behaviors, at least not from my close, inner circle. However, in regards to 'neighbors' and 'acquaintances', I keep this part of myself private. I believe that people are inherently judgemental of lifestyles they do not understand.
My wife was the first person I told and that was when I asked her to marry me.
She didn't have a problem then and she still doesn't over 24 years later.
Since then, we have told pretty much all of my family, her daughter, friends, and the neighbors know just from seeing me outside.
I have yet to hear any negative comments from anyone.
I told my brother, who was a Episcopal Priest, before he died. I am so glad I had that conversation with him. He knew who his little brother was before his boss called him home.
I have never regretted telling anyone.
Hi Jeannette,
First, no need to apologize for your English -- you're doing very well indeed! (Actually my mother's parents were born in the Netherlands, but I never learned any Dutch, sad to say...) My situation is very different from yours and probably is irrelevant, but no, I've not told any of my family. (My parents passed away years ago, and my family is spread out across the country.) I am out to numerous friends. Just reading your post, I'd agree with your girl friend -- best not to tell them, at least at this point in your life. It sounds as though your CD'ing is largely private, and for now you may want to keep it that way. [But this is obviously your decision.]
Take care (what is the Dutch for that?),
Claire
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club
Hi Claire,
Thank you for your warm and friendly reply. And of course for the compliment on my Englishhaha!!
Doe voorzichtig is Dutch for 'take care'. Good luck with trying to pronounce that one!!!
Only you knows your personal situation and only you can make this kind of decision.
Just for the record, the only person that knew was my late SO (significant other). I'm retired, there would be no negative consequences, so I have very slowly let a few others know. It's one of those things that has legs, so if you want to control the terms, once you're out, you're out.
ALWAYS plan for the worst, then you can be pleasantly surprised if something else happens!
"The important thing about the bear is not how well she dances, but that she dances at all." - Old Russian Proverb (with a gender change)
Yes and no. My wife, step son, and wife's sister all know and are supportive. My parents, brother, and sister-in-law (who all live 5000 miles away in another country) do not.
.
The River City Gems - Northern California's largest and most active crossdressing & transgender support group!
Only my online family here and a few Sales Associates at Dress Barn who know a gentleman who buys dresses and pays in cash
My family is N.I.M.B.Y. tolerant to things like this and in all honesty would likely have less of a problem if I were gay than they would if they knew I was a "dresser".
Most any thing I post is from my phone, this is why my answers are short and also why I don't post all to often.
I told my sister 35 years ago, but she's no longer living. She probably told my mom who also is no longer living. I never had the courage to tell my older brother, but he's probably heard something thru the grapevine or had suspicions. Same with my two nephews. Cousins etc., probably haven't a clue.
That said, family and ex girlfriends in the RW have no idea what level I'm at with crossdressing. DADT
"You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder
My mom and sister know. Neither accepts it. Mom pretends it's something that I can just stop whenever I want, and seems disappointed in me that I haven't 'grown out' of it. Sister has removed herself from my life gradually after learning about my crossdressing. Communication is down to my making occasional phone calls, and she gives one word or short answers to any question, doesn't initiate any contact, and has no interest in me or my life at all.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I'm also in the yes and no category. I've told two of my sisters, they were cool about it didn't freak out or anything. As it is not a part of our relationship, it never gets mentioned...
Accidental exposure...
This past Thanksgiving I was cooking my a$$ off. I woke up, donned my skirt and sandals, and got about it.
Many hours later, I was still cooking. Dripping in sweat, still in swishies and anklets.
The family arrived, with me still in a long indian skirt and a cami. Oh, HAI!
Nobody blinked. I got 100% feedback on my food. NOBODY said a word about how I was dressed while I served it.
/swish!
If I love you, I will spoil you. I will spend all kinds of crazy effort and money to provide you a unique experience... because of YOU.
Your family is your family. You don't get to pick them.
<3
- MM
- Madame Moose - on my way to Anne
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"I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And when I am for myself, what am 'I'? And if not now, when?" - Hillel the Elder
My immediate family know about Michelle. My wife, as I have reported before, tolerates having Michelle as part of life but is not especially keen - I can usually guarantee a sideways look if I suggest that Michelle would like a day out with her rather than Stephen. Both my married daughters know - one is accepting, one is not. Sadly, the one who is not lives only 20 miles away, the one who is lives several thousand miles away! The distant grandson has met his granny Michelle via Skype quite often and seems quite unfazed by this strange apparition who sounds like grandad! The much closer granddaughters have yet to meet their granny Michelle - when they Skyped a couple of weeks ago and Michelle was making marmalade they were told "grandad is busy".
My parents know but have never met Michelle - I think we are comfortable with that for the timebeing. My mother's sister (also my godmother) knows and has seen pictures. My brother, whose lives is split between Hong Kong and Singapore has met Michelle 2 or 3 times and is cool with this - but I would expect that from someone whose main job is in counselling. He was a little confused when he first met Michelle because, like me, he could see the family resemblance to our mother and aunt and he wanted to call me Audrey (my aunt and godmother).
My wife's family are generally unaware I think...sister in New Zealand knows but her sister closer to home doesn't...I was amazed last autumn when there was discussion about a handbag she had given my wife for her birthday. I was given the task of telling her that it wasn't really her style and, I added, it wasn't Michelle's style either. "Who's Michelle?", she asked. I decided just to gloss over it at that point but I shall be waiting the opportunity to enlighten her. She oughtn't to be too upset - her husband is regularly to be seen wearing a "skirt" - well, OK, a kilt - he being a Scottish Lowlander who is frequently called upon in his non-Scottish home to do such things as addressing the haggis on Burns' night.
There are quite a few cousins, most of whom are unaware of Michelle's existence. I think my wife is happier with it that way and I am content to let it ride for now...
So, it is "yes and no" for me.
Michelle
xxx
My wife and my daughter both know. Both found out by being nosy. My wife despises it, so,much so that I rent a heated storage unit without her knowledge and dress there. In an interesting take on things, my daughter considers the knowledge to be an unintended punishment for being nosy. (A nosy person's version of "be careful what you wish for because you might get it"). No one else knows. And I have an enormous family, all of them far, far away and little contact. I will not tell them. It is none of their business. They consider me to be an egghead and rather loony for other reasons, so I doubt that they would care if they found out.
My late wife knew and was supportive but when she passed away almost two years ago I moved back in the closet. I wouldn't be surprised if my adult children know or at least suspect, but I haven't had the discussion with them yet. I expect there will be some embarrassment and maybe even shock when that happens, but in the end they will either accept me or not. I believe they will.
None of my old friends are aware of this in my life and they may not ever need to know about it. I have close friends who are crossdressers or T.S. and they have all seen me dressed both as male and female and I have posted every time in the boy mode/girl mode photo thread, and no one I know in my male life has ever approached me about that. I think eventually it will make life a little less complicated and stressful if I come out to my kids, but I'm still waiting for a couple of things to happen before I take that step.
Sarah
Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.
My ex-wife made it a point to tell my mother and my two sisters at the time when we were getting a divorce. They never said anything to me about it and I haven't said anything to them about it either.
When I was growing up I did confess to one of my sister's that I enjoyed wearing women's clothes. It was the sister that I used to borrow some of her dresses to wear.
Even after both of my sister's moved out my parents would always have the older sister drop by to check on me if they went on vacation. One day I spent all day dressed as a woman when my sister came by to check on me, needless to say she wasn't pleased to see me dressed as a woman.
She never said anything to our parents but the ex sure did.
My Mother knows and has done now for 7 months, she accepts it but never wants to see me. Nobody else knows and they don't need to.
Last edited by Michelle 78; 02-09-2015 at 01:18 PM.
My family doesn't know yet, but I think a few may suspect.
My closest friends, however, do know and are accepting.
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