I never should have spent so much money in crossplaying....

[Kimonogirl]

I am not saying crossplay is bad at all.

Nevertheless being a crossplayer in Korea was.....loss......

Among very arrogant, exclusive and proud Korean gg cosplayers I was just ugly crossdresser

While they do not denounce people like me directly, they always denounce people like us via Korean message board like Threadic.

Did not know what to do to make me more feminine. Since I had to study in univ and I had to be conscripted.

Could not really get along with male cosplayers since not all of them liked crossplaying. And they were extremely rare and gg's didn't like

Mongol-looking guys with awkward skin tones and awkward eyes for cosplayer.

My mental illness was bothering me as well.

And those feelings of anguish just made me buy and buy female characters' costumes.

And it took too long time to realize this was a waste and my body was too inadequate to fit in such clothes.....

I could have bought steel corsets, giant tourniquet pressurizes bulged parts of body, or i5 cpu and mobo for my pleasure.....unless I spent so much money without discretion

How could I have been so careless? Did my past twelve year under totalitarian, brainwashing education system make me do this?

[Jenny Elwood]

Why do you get a strange sense of relief when you read of someone with bigger problems than yourself?

[Kimonogirl]

Do I?
Even if I do, because I have practically lost almost all hope...
I feel like I really wasted my youth by "studying" for "university" under strange education system....

[tammie]

HI Kimonogirl: Don't be so hard on yourself , we have all done the same thing to a more or less degree . Crossdressing is very impractical for most men , I couldn't pass at midnite in a coal mine, but I still love buying lingerie I cant wear , and wearing the thigns I can only at home . So forgive yourself and do better going forward honey, and you are in good company

[Beverley Sims]

Like others are saying, keep doing what you are doing and play the game within the rules of your situation.
Later in life things will change and you will have more freedom.

Looking Mongol can be hard but look at how Mongol women present themselves.

You may want to look Westernised but try and go with the limitations.

You can probably model yourself on a Mongol model much better.

Not many of us really look as good as we would like to be.

[Kimonogirl]

People's bigotry and Asian ggs' arrogance will never change, will they?
And you should have added word "dude" so it can be like "Looking Mongol DUDE can be hard......"
Yes it IS hard and generally they look as ugly as average Japanese dudes (both have awkward eyes, awkward skin tones and awkward voice tones)!
(I am Korean but most people are mixed race composed of Manchurian, Mongols, Vietnamese, Ancient Koreans, alike, not good looking races)
Not sure if I am too biased but Korean models look somewhat cheap.

[CarlaWestin]

Maybe this white american dude can offer some positive insight. At 23, you have already conquered the fear of gender exploration and achieved a level of education reserved for an elite few. It appears as though you already have a level of financial security that few of your age even possess the concept of. Please, enjoy and celebrate your youth. And don't even acknowledge those who make comments. You have many wonderful years ahead without the baggage of haters.

[Kimonogirl]

Really? Are you not joking?
As for education, I still need to polish English grammars and rely on online dictionary a lot.
As for financial security, it is real shame but I rely on my parents' support still.
Since my graduation of high, I have been wondering "Overall price keeps skyrocketing in Korea and employers only barely offer very low minimum wage.
I don't think doing some part time jobs is not worth it."
I was born in circa '91 I am 24-25. Still I am not too old? heh