I am entering the most important steps of my transition. I am more ready than ever! Since this week-end, everyday has been a source of new experiences and important steps in starting my transition. I am so happy so far I wanted to share
I am now living almost full-time. I'm in guy mode only at work or in front of my parents on Skype (they are still in shock, they need time). So far I came out to 56 people, but the list is going to increase very quickly very soon (at work). So here are my last adventures:
- Friday night, I went out in a small club (25-30 people). I was enjoying the music, started to dance while imitating other girls (I realized it's all in the hips!). After a bit, one of the guys started to hit on me. He was not really sober but was able to speak clearly. He came 5 or 6 times to me, asked me out, called me pretty, he had his hand behind my back, he asked 3 times if I had a boyfriend, and he even asked for my number. I was not interested (as I am only interested in women), but to me, that was a major achievement. I was passable to a genetic male!! I did some more progress on my hair, makeup and manners, that probably helped. I also still lose weight, and I have reached standard size clothes, making me more attractive overall (such a good incentive for losing weight).
- Saturday afternoon, I went to the mall with a GG friend. My goal was to buy clothes I can wear at work (we have no dress code, it is awesome, but still, I need to be passable, not attracting attention too much). I got several types of clothes for which I was inexperienced (like jeans), with the help of my friend. For example, at Forever 21, she came with me in the dressing room, and each time we were both trying a piece of clothing, we were getting out and talking about each other's styles. That was great! And apparently, I am making girls jealous with my legs and back. That afternoon was like a dream in real life. After several stores, we went to find shoes, and I got 5 pairs at Payless, and being able to try them properly is amazing, they all fit great.
- Saturday night, I went to Hamburger Mary's for the first time. That was the first time I was showing my male ID while en femme to get a drink. They are used to it at that place, and it worked well. It was a girls night out (there was still one boyfriend), but I was so happy belonging to a girl group.
- After that, we went downtown, to a club that is not particularly LGBT friendly, just a standard one. It was completely packed (Saturday night at peak time). I presented as Karolyn, showed my ID to enter, the bouncer didn't even twitch. I was able to go in. I was really impressed.
In all those experiences, from the mall to the club, I have never seen a single person doing a double take or looking at me weirdly. As part of a crowd, I think I now blend. Such a great feeling.
- Sunday, I had 4 friends coming to my place to have some barbecue. It was the first time for them to see Karolyn in real-life. It went great too, I got good feedback.
- Today in the morning, I discovered a small patch of beard missing, that was the first positive result of my laser spot test I did 10 days ago. So I will be able to have laser done on my beard.
- Today (Tuesday), I went to my most important doctor appointment, the endocrinologist. And she is going to give me the prescription for hormones. My next visit is in 3 months. I had blood work done, and when the results will be available in about a week, I will get the prescription.
- This afternoon, I talked to the human resources at work to give them the green light for organizing meetings with executives and managers to reveal my transition. I am going to send my coming out email during next week. My planned date to start working en femme is March 16th, in a week and a half. But it might move to the 17th because we are moving our office desks to the upper floor.
- Tomorrow, I will talk to my physician about my transition, and to reevaluate my medication for high blood pressure (as spiro is an anti-hypertension in the first place).
- Thursday, I am going for my first full beard removal with laser. Goodness, I already have nightmares about this one. The pain was so bad during the spot test, I am so scared of that visit. I will be ready to reduce the pain, and I will have numbing cream to help, but it will still be very painful.
I cannot wait to start dressing at work. It is coming very soon!