out and about as man-dressed-as-woman

[pamela7]

Today I have been out twice - to a business meeting and then a social meet in the local pub. Both times I went out in knee-length boots, jeggings, t-top and a light fleece made by welshgirl (nice flare at the hips to simulate "hips").

At the meeting - in a cafe - I had a nice look from the waitress, and my colleagues were as usual fine, the new business person we met looked, noticed, said nothing, but kept admiring, she liked my dressing (bear in mind this is no wig, no make-up, just man in women's clothing), and invited me to go shopping with her after, which we did, even a shop where we had to take our boots off, and it was really evident - the assistant appeared to notice nothing/no reaction/no nothing, nor at the next shop. On the High St, again, lots of people, no-one really noticing.

In the pub also, the landlord appeared to notice nothing, a rowdy group of guys also nothing. it all seemed easy and uneventful, but for me, well it's settled any nerves about the man-in-a-dress issue, and I'm ready to roll-out the lifestyle. This is me. :-)

[Alice_2014_B]

That is something I would never be able to do.

[JayeLefaye]

Hi Pamela,

Well done!!!

I have reached a point in my life where I'm comfortable mixing and matching. Keeping age-appropriate in mind, sometimes I go full en femme, and sometimes, as a dude-in dress...Or jeggings:-). Both styles have their advantages, and it just depends on what kind of mood I'm in.

I've gone round and round with myself as to the various "social consciousness" of each presentation. I hope your thread doesn't turn into a debate about that, so I'll just stick with a couple of quick, from my perspective only, observations from going out as a mix & match.

1. I find it to be a lot easier/freer/less nerve-wracking, to not be all out en femme. I don't have to worry about being "outed" or "made", or whatever, because I'm not trying to pass. I'm simply dressing as I feel and wearing it like I mean it.

2. I've had 100% positive interactions with whoever I interact with...Granted, there may be a look or two behind my back, but fortunately, I don't have eyes in the back of my head:-)

3. My one "social consciousness" 2 cents, is a concept that goes something like this: If I pass 100%, then I'm not moving the social awareness bar at all. I'm not some bearded dude prancing down Main Street in a negligee. I'm just a guy going about his business, being friendly, grocery shopping etc. and spending money.

And I'll just leave it off here, because this thread ain't about me. It's about YOU!!!

Well done!!!

Jaye

[Beverley Sims]

My past time when touring the UK was to dress similarly to yourself, I found no confrontation or anything to intimidate me.

I did find a couple of times when I was looking at lingerie I was offered a bra fitting.

I took these up as there was a breast cancer promo on at the time, have a bra fitting and the store got points for it.

[Teresa]

Pamela,
All my outing moments have been as a guy in a dress ! OK only walking the dog , I was caught by a full commuter train when wearing a skirt and T-shirt .
I bumped into a horse rider wearing a bra and cami! ! Finally had a jokey moment with a railway repair gang when wearing a skirt and T-shirt !

The World doesn't end and handled in the right way can be a bit of fun ! Thanks for sharing your good experience !

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Yay Pamela! I'm proud of you.

[jjjjohanne]

I am not attracted to being a woman. I just want to wear the clothes. At some point I discovered that I could wear the clothes and not present female. That was my day of freedom. I never tried to present female again (not that I had done it all that often). I have gone out in public as a man in a skirt or dress at least a dozen times, and perhaps two dozen. About half of those times, I was out on an all day trip. Apparently, I am worth looking at, but no one is rude. I have seen some snickers and two open laughs. I have seen people intentionally walk past me so they could get a better look. Most people will respond if I greet them. Some people have greeted me without me starting the conversation. On a couple occasions, an older woman would want to spend some time talking to me to learn about crossdressing. Sometimes I use a lanyard with my ID and money in it because I don't carry a purse. On two occasions, someone approached me for help thinking I was an employee in the store I was in. Once I went ballroom dancing in a skirt and found that women would dance with a man in a skirt. Most would never mention my clothes. I was even asked by a woman for a dance once or twice. I think that if I chose to live my life full-time like this, it would not be a big event.

[pamela7]

yay, thanking everyone here,
today another meeting in town, walked down, en-femme (apart from my man-boots, and no wig/make-up), no-one really noticed me, same in the pub, same with the new business person met, on the way home some nice smiles from the ladies - definitely a club going on there. Afternoon tea in a cafe, not even a "look" there. It's all good!

[docrobbysherry]

Aha! U don't live in the US, Pam. NOW, I get it!

[pamela7]

go on DocRobbySherry, explain why the USA is different to here ... ;-)

I kid you not, people treat me nicer when I'm en-femme, with or without wigs and make-up

[celeste26]

I have been working en femme, yep H&R Block. My license is still in my male name but I have yet to go in drab. Spent 80+ hours in classes too. I dress office casual and dont make a fuss and all is A OK.

[Ms.Kenadie]

I will echo JayeLefaye on this one.

Congrats Pamela!

[charlenesomeone]

Congrats Pamela, just a question, do you wear forms or shapewear?
I know here in the south USA, most women don't wear makeup and
dress is shorts and tshirt.

[pamela7]

Hi Charlene,
The answer to forms is "sometimes, and to varying degrees of padding", and to shapewear "no, but welshgirl has styled fleeces and skirts to flare for me, giving the illusion of hip shaping". I am looking forward to summer and the lighter-looser clothing. I'm also pacing welshgirl on how I'm dressing away from home, which is step by step, as she lets go of how I am dressed - she used to have her opinions even when it was drab clothing.

My secondary answer to the forms/shapes, is that I don't need to wear them, but feel its right to do if I'm attending a CD event, because then it's all about dressing to the full. It's the clothing that does it for me (i might still be in unconscious denial about anything further, but consciously it feels right).

[Marcelle]

Hi Pamela,

I am glad to read you had such a positive experience . . . onwards and upwards!

Hugs

Isha

[Sarah M]

I'm not out to everyone yet an when go out I do wear a girls tank top an a guys western shirt an Girl jeans with a thong underneath an I wear the girls no show ankle socks an girls athletic shoes. No one has never said anything about.

[Brenn]

This is the way I dress most weekends, although I am usually mixing men's and women's clothing. Today I have been out wearing women's jeans, ballet flats and a turtleneck. Never had a negative reaction.

[joan47]

I have taken to always wearing yoga pants, tight girls jeans either skinny or flasir or leggings in male mode. Pierced ears, thin arched eyebrows, arylic nails, perfume, lip gloss

[mechamoose]

That 'mix and match' thing is kind of how I do things most days. It can work quite well. Many males won't pick up on it, but many women will...and won't care.

Skirts are a bigger step when going out, it WILL get noticed.

Step at a time, sweetie. Do what works for you and what makes you feel comfortable (and safe!)

- MM

[CountessVF]

That is something I would never be able to do.

I agree with Alice here. You're a rockstar for being able to do that. I draw my curtains and wouldn't answer my door on a bet. I'm fact only one friend knows I like this.

[pamela7]

got to wear pink nail polish to the gym today (and a fem lyrca top) ... not sure anyone even noticed - apart from welshgirl - progress!!!