What did you think when you were younger?

[Alice_2014_B]

What did you think of cross-dressing and cross-dressers whenyou were younger and dressing up?
I'm talking about grade-school ages.
I searched the forum for such a thread/question. (Forgive me if it is already out there.)

I thought I was the only straight boy who would try on high heels, pantyhose, and bras whenever I got the chance AND liked girls at the same time.
I saw cross-dressing as something for strictly entertainment purposes, especially as I was introduced to Monty Python at a young age (poor me, LOL).

[Yoshisaur]

Back then I didn't even know what crossdressing and crossdressers are. All I knew was that I liked wearing women's clothing and it wasn't right for boys to do that for some reason.

[Kate Simmons]

When I was younger I thought it was impossible to be a "woman" but now I know it can definitely be done if we want to do it.

[kimdl93]

I had no context...all I knew as a preschooler was that I was 'different' in the eyes of my parents and siblings. I took different as synonymous with bad or defective.

[Barbara Dugan]

What did I think when I was a kid...''This is way to dangerous, I feel I am different but I am going to hide it the best I can'' the place where I lived at that time was really bad for a Transgender person of any age, you were usually trow out of your house, beat and harassed on the streets or sometimes even worst than that.
I personally saw this happened to a few people and made scared to be myself.

[Rachael Leigh]

I'm not sure what I thought when I was younger but about middle school I tried to research it.
I remember seeing an article on Rene Richards and wondered if that was what I was.
I never really said anything about this to my parents so I went on trying to understand on my own

[karinels]

As a child, even before i was 5 years old, I had been telling my parents that i wanted to be a girl. I was always trying to sneak into my sisters clothes and wanted long hair, wear dresses, everything that a girl did and was. My parents, being early and mid '70's parents kept insisting I was going through a phase and one day I will forget about these things. Well, at 45, I have lived pretty much my entire life lying to myself and others, I have let people down because I did not want to leave the house as that meant i had to change clothes. There is so much waste in my life all because I have never been happy with who I am. Maybe if they would have listened and sought help, things would have been different, maybe not. I have had good times in my life, and I have friends, 1 especially that I would never want to have lived without the experiences we have gone through together. But I sure wish I had been a girl through it all, rather than an awkward, love stricken, not manly, little confidence, too passive, really unhappy silly example of a human being. I have had moments, I have not had a life.

[Confucius]

Well, I was interested in cross-dressing from a very early age (as long as I can remember). It seemed normal to me. When I played "dress-up" my older brother and friends would tease me mercilessly. I didn't believe I was different. I thought that all boys really wanted to dress-up like girls, but that we were required to keep it secret or face endless harassment. So I decided I had to keep it a secret too. Boys were supposed to pretend to hate girly things, just to support our gender.

Then when I was around 12-13 years old, I read a Dear Abby column where it said that if a male enjoyed dressing as a girl then he has a mental illness. That was the first time I realized I was really different. After that I believed I was an oddity, and my self esteem fell. I felt worthless.

[Tracii G]

Never gave it much thought back then but when I hit my junior year in high school I knew there was something different about me.
My best girl friends down the street thought it would be cool to dress me up and go to the senior prom.
I was all up for it because I loved girls clothes.
I had really long hair so they did my hair in a formal up doo and their Mom drove us to the prom.
Had a blast at the prom BTW.
Most people thought I must have gone to another school because they didn't recognize me.

[karinels]

Never gave it much thought back then but when I hit my junior year in high school I knew there was something different about me.
My best girl friends down the street thought it would be cool to dress me up and go to the senior prom.
I was all up for it because I loved girls clothes.
I had really long hair so they did my hair in a formal up doo and their Mom drove us to the prom.
Had a blast at the prom BTW.
Most people thought I must have gone to another school because they didn't recognize me.

You are a very lucky gurl to have been able to go to prom enfemme, Tracii. I for one am extremely jealous of you for that.

[TerriM]

I was born in 1948. I remember reading about Christine Jorgensen in the paper. She was a WWII US paratrooper who had gotten a sex change. My earliest memory of dressing was trying on my mothers slip. I also remember reading about aversive therapy and worrying that I would be put in a mental hospital. My girlfriend would put makeup on me at my urging. She really didn't know how much I loved it. At 18 I went into the army . When I came home I got married. My feelings were still there and always will be.

[cheryl reeves]

i guess i was kinda lucky being born in 65.when i was born my mom was disappointed that i wasnt a girl,for all she had was girl clothes,so for the first two yrs i wore girl clothes,til my dad said enough and made a boy out of me.growing up i preferred playing with girls then boys,never felt comfortable around other males.by 1978 information was coming forth positivly on transgenderism,i learned alot from reading stories of those who went before. after my dad died when i was 16 i found i had the house too myself alot,my middle sis and younger sis and mom were out doing their own thing,so while they were away i indulged in crossdressing as much as possible,at that time me and my middle sis were the same size in bra and panties and my moms dressess felt wonderful.i knew growing up where i did you learned to be careful.at the age of 22 i told my now so about me,so for 11 yrs it was nities every once in a while,it was at the age of 35 and almost destroying our marriage i came clean,since then we have had our share of adventures.

[Pat]

In grade school we're just kids. At that point I didn't know there was such a thing as cross-dressing. There was just this thing I enjoyed doing on occasion. To me each event was spontaneous and not connected to any previous event. At various times I heard of transvestites but never connected it to me or my pattern of behavior.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Alice, About 68years ago when I was around 4years old all I knew was that it sure was
fun playing with mom's Hi-Heels and the rest is history.

[Khora]

In my early teens, before I discovered the internet I thought I was the only boy on the planet that wanted to wear girls' clothes. I always thought I was alone and there was no way there were others like me. Once I got onto the internet I discovered how wrong I was.

[Alanea]

I was probablly 4 or 5 when i can recall first starting cd ing, i would wrap a blanket around me and pretend it was a dress, I can tell you exactly what I was thinking....I thought I was a girl or should be since i have a vivid memory of asking my mother one day out of the blue, MOM, AM I A BOY OR A GIRL? Her responce was you are a boy! I was about 5or6 at the time!!
Alanea

[irene9999]

I always saw crossdressing as something taboo in society from watching daytime talk shows in the 90s. Somehow, anytime I saw a TS or CD person on tv I would find them appealing and was always intrigued by them. As I grew older and started looking around the internet I saw that there's quite a few of us and here we are!

[KC Samanatha]

Wow, great question. I can recall being 10 or 11 and wanting wear what my sister was wearing and wanting to put on pantyhose. I just thought at the time it was not "normal", but I enjoyed the feeling so much I wouldn't stop. I can remember watching Wonder Woman with Lynda Carter and wanting to be her.

[Dana44]

Alice, oh yeah, In high school in the plays I always wanted to be the woman LOL, Entertainment yep. Still though even though I had feminine thoughts running through my head, I was a male in a male dominated society and found that I had to measure up. I fond that I became very stable in my own thoughts and always beat to my own drum. I became successful in business and engineering. One time I had a girlfriend and bought her lots of lingerie, one time she brought a bunch of them to me and said, why do you do this. I said that I want to see you in them. Well, she replied, "If you like them so much, why don't you wear them?" LOL I said, perhaps I'll try it. LOL it all came flooding back into me at that time. I did and well you all know what happens next.

[TxCassie]

As a child, I never thought anything about it. I played with my sis' clothes and just thought it was fun. Of course, that was before mom caught me, "Don't want to be a sissy boy, do you?" I remember those words, even today. So, I knew my "playing girly" had to be kept to myself, which I did until I was about 11yrs - 12yrs. Then, that horrible, horrible, horrible puberty started to wield it's nasty testosterone and a husky boy started to turn into this stocky, broad shoulders, thick thighed, teenager. So, physically, I was forced to stop because anything I tried on would tear so easily. But then, it was for the best because, at the same time, I began to discover my attraction to the other stocky, broad shoulders, thick thighed boys UGHHHH!
Hold the Presses, Do not pass Go, and you better not Collect $200.00. One of the many fears of a teenage gay boy is the fear that everyone will think he's wants to be a girl, that he is weak emotional, a sissy... NO WAY!.

So, anything remotely attached me to anything feminine was shunned. I was Mr. Macho, a gentleman on the outside and with the girls, but with the other guys, it was "Man Up, Cowboy Up, Don't be a *****" That lasted till I was 40 years old, on a decreasing scale.

Things started to change once I hit my forties. I began to feel that I lived a good life, and lived a life for others, was a good son, brother, uncle, employee, even attended Mass every Sunday. But here I was all alone. It was a chance meeting with a police officer in the gym, (ok, I was on the hunt, believe me, if you saw him....). In our conversation, he let it be known that he wore pantyhose to keep warm on cold nights. When we got back to his place, he modeled them for me, and then he let me try on a pair.. and BINGO!... almost thirty years of pent up desire, wishes, dreams... all came home.

So, I now think of things a bit differently.

Cassie

[justmetoo]

That was a long time ago for me! lol
I know I had a strong desire to dress as far back as I can remember. Certainly as early as early elementary school (5 or 6 years old?). I also know I knew it was something that I "shouldn't" be doing. My macho father would've blown his stack, that's for sure. So I kept it a secret. To the best of my knowledge no one had a clue and I was never caught. When I came out to various family members in recent years none of them gave me any indication that they had any idea.

[julia ann]

when I was a youngster I knew I was the only male in the history of the world that had ever even thought about wearing close and looking like a pretty girl. Might have been just a little bit off on that I do have to admit now! :-)

[LookingGlass]

I was conflicted about it. The first few times I saw crossdressing in media it was always in comedic roles making it apparent that it would be bad to be caught. I was already fantasizing clothes and shoes I'd see in catalogs and on women and girls. Couple that with taking pajamas I had and turning them into bikinis and slave girl Leia from Return of the Jedi outfits, this was all rather disheartening. Fast forward a few decades and I've just now started coming to grips with things and moving in a more positive direction. I think it was breaking down and finally buying my first pair of black stiletto heels started the healing hahaha

[cheryl reeves]

it was the macho male i had a problem with for they thought stupid thoughts about me which lead to them getting a attitude adjustment. see until i got married and slowed down i always weighed 120-130,heavist i got was 3 mo in the military where i went to 140,problem was and is im very strong,just never showed it. this is why i never ever undressed in front of a male,for i was different and got tired of beating a macho males behind. even dressed i carry myself in way that says messing with me is a bad idea...

[CountessVF]

I also grew up with a healthy dose of Monty Python. Fancy that. The earliest memory involving CD was some movie where a couple women get back at their boss with roofies, bondage and crossdressing. I'm not sure I knew what "turned on" was, but I definitely was. Even tho I tried stuff on I was able to mentally back flip and think that all Crossdressers were probably gay. To clarify, I am hetero. Anyhoo.... I like beer.