Certainly a wife has a right to go into the garage. If she was looking for something I would not call it "snooping". There are any number of things she could have been looking for when she stumbled upon the "stash". That's why I made the comment in post #8.
I didn't have to ask. We had a fight earlier in the day about some information she was supposed to get for our taxes that she hadn't. SHe was looking for a donation receipt, and when she couldn't find it she went to where I keep all our old paperwork in the garage. I'm always the one who handles these things, so I figured that was a safe area to keep stuff… and it was for a couple of years, but now the secret is out.Originally Posted by ~Joanne~
In reality, I'm relieved she found it and now knows. Easy to say since she seems nonjudgmental right now and forgiving. She was pretty distraught when she called me at work. I think my honesty put her at ease, but that's probably also due to the fact that I don't want SRS, HRT or anything else, but just like to dress occasionally.
I can tell she's not really ready to talk or ask questions. In the spirit of her not having anymore surprises, I made sure she knew that dressing for me means trying to look like a woman, in case she runs across a makeup bag or something eventually. But I'm letting it go at her pace. Eventually I'll probably try to see if we can come up with some times when she and the kids can be out and I can dress, but for at the least the next month I'm letting her take the lead.
You are lucky, now play it cool and try and do as your wife suggests without having to sacrifice it all.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
My wife found mine about 10 yrs ago. They all do soooner or later hon, remember they are smarter than us too. Its better now that she knows but still never wants to talk about it so i keep it from her. She would freak out totally if she know I liked going out too on occasion or meet with others.
She's still sorting it out. Not ready to know about when I'm dressing, not knowing how this will effect us in the future, but she's also not wanting to shut down and deny a part of me. Pretty tough on her, since she has nobody other than me to talk to about it.
You are very lucky it went over well, and I'm glad.
Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."
-Home Movies
(cartoon series)
Shoe size: 9 US women's.
Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
Height: 5' 6".
This is something that is tough for a wife to deal with, the fact that she has nobody to talk to other than you. My wife and I went through the same situation years ago. I was completely honest with her and she began to except me more as time went on. She would take the kids out for the day to give me time to dress and covered for me at other times.
Dana Ryan
The same thing happened to me as well. I was fortunate that she accepted this and has been able to have fun with the whole concept.
The important thing is not to push the issue.
Maybe surprise her with something special for her understanding!
Best of luck.
I have tried to be honest with my wife about crossdressing, and we both talked to a therapist. Unfortunately, the therapist my wife was using had no real experience with CD people, and my behavior was given a number of labels, including " an addiction". For several years , I bought into this idea, went to meetings, andmy wife and I have improved our sexual relationship. Now, over the last four months, I have accumulated clothes, shoes, makeup, and hair pieces again. I hate the word, "stash" because it sounds like a term coined by a sophomore in college. I have been crossdressing off and on for over forty years,and each time my wife finds out, I finally purge due to the pressure to stop and conform. My wife is my best friend and soulmate, and we have been married almost 39 years, but when it comes to this issue, she only sees black and white. I hate feeling like I have to conceal this part of me, but I have to preserve my fem self. Looking for a win-win solution, CarlyJ
Glad it went so well for you Shayna you have a good woman therehun. I've got one word for you "FLOWERS".
Angie
You can tell her there is a private support section here for wives and girlfriends.
Instructions on how to join the FAB (female-at-birth) forum:
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...f#faq_gg_forum
Reine
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