Probably not uncommon, and I have posted about it before, but my biggest struggle since transition was accepting all was good and that I can just go on and live it. When things settle down, you would think it would be easy, but not for me as it is like waiting for the other shoe to drop. Well, I have had a few things that have been pushing me in a good direction, and believe it or not, Diva Las Vegas did a lot to this end. But this last weekend really did a lot.
I went to a women's retreat with my wife to Lava Hot Springs. If you haven't been to one of these places, basically a bit of a tourist trap, but they have pools that are naturally heated from the ground. So we were there with about 80 other ladies. I asked my wife how many of them know about me (it was her crowd) and she said 3-4. Well two came with us and shared a hotel room. One was a lady that divorced her crossdressing husband (yikes). So do the math on the rest. My expectations for the weekend was being figured out, some looks of various types, and some fun. Hopefully no staredowns or "what are you doing here".
Well, I was well accepted and didn't see as much as a flinch. Lots of talking and bonding. Maybe they just hid it well, but I was also in some conversations that were rather personal, so I am thinking they didn't hear it in my voice. Just to push my luck right away, on Friday night, we had karaoke. Now the crowd had died down a bit, but once my wife tried it (she is never in front of anyone), I had to take my first shot ever of singing in front of others. A little 70's love song (sang to my wife) of Always and Forever. Well, no one passed out, gave me funny looks, or ran screaming. Maybe the music was turned up nice and high.
On Saturday night, we all hit the hot pools together. I only had a one piece, stretchy suit that wasn't skirted, but I went for it. I only had to look like the old woman I was. More joking around, storytelling, and bonding. We laid around the pool for a couple of hours and I had a great time.
So a great weekend and if they had me figured out, more power to them as they hid it well. I really feel personality coming out that I probably kept under wraps before. And a bonus for the weekend is that a friend that lives almost 5 hours away ended up there also. It was great to catch up with her! I love it!
Me serenading my love. Looks like a loud note (or lack of a note depending on your hearing).