Alice my heart goes out to you. I've been shopping about 8 times now and only had a minor issue. Some lady looked like a deer in the headlights when I was carrying dresses into the change room (unisex btw). I asked her "were the dresses that hideous? I thought they were nice". She stated at me for a second, said she was sorry and I laughed. Never let them get under your skin. But 99.99% of the time everything is fine.
My approach is own it. I'm gonna try and get into those sephora classes and if anyone asks ill say straight up I'm a crossdresser, lets do this. Each minute I'm not living as I choose to express myself is time wasted. Some days I want shorts, beer and football. Today, right now as I type, I'm wearing a LBD with some Sam moon accessories and a great pair of sandals. Get your chin up girl, the world isn't against you. We, the forum gurls, are always with you in spirit.