Lack of CDing- how does it affect you?

[Debra Russell]

Life's a Bi!ch when I don't get to dress ...............................Debra

[charlenemichaels]

After a failed marriage, for which discovery of my CDing was the precipitating factor, I went pretty deeply into the pink fog for a while. It was huge fun, with no worries about getting caught, because "getting caught" had already happened, and done its damage. But then I asked myself, is this all I really want in my life--getting my sexual satisfaction alone, and having no partner in life? I didn't think it likely that I would find a woman who would be comfortable with my dressing up for sexual pleasure, so I decided to try making a choice: no CDing, in order to foster a good relationship. For me, it worked. CDing remained a big part of my fantasy life, but I was able to resist the urge to act upon those urges, and I had a great relationship--sexually and otherwise--with my second wife, until her death several years ago. Now I'm free to make choices again. I'm not looking for a new relationship; I have plenty of friends and activities. I'm too old to be able to dress up again as the intensely sexy young and middle-aged woman that I enjoyed becoming back when I was actively dressing. I do some online cybersex, and I sometimes get some vicarious pleasure from the experiences of the women on this site. And for me, this site helps me to come to terms with, and accept, some of the non-standard ways in which I have enjoyed my sexuality since I was a child playing around with my mother's and my aunt's underthings. But as for active crossdressing, those days are gone for me. My fantasy life is still active and gives me some powerful excitement, which I am okay with satisfying on my own, alone. While I have some regrets about some things in my life, as I think any self-aware and honest person my age does, I feel good about most of what my life has been and what it will be in my remaining years.

Hi Lori- i have had some of those concerns as i am in middle age but to stop all together, wow. Not sure i can do that!
My CD life has spanned 40 years and has evolved with the struggles that all long trips encounter.
The rough spots when i need to dress even half dress keep me sane and on the road comfortably.

Charlene is me and I her. My therapist a GG, gave me some of the most comforting advice that has worked for me.
She said dont stop because you can't stop. You will never stop even with guilt, purges etc. She summed her advice to me by telling me "Give yourself permission never to stop and just get it done. Its in your DNA so accept it and love your life".

Thats what i did over 5 years ago and never looked back. Years from now if i look 'matronly' or 'miss doubtfire-ish' that is ok with me. I've accept that reality already.

Thankfully i have a lot of living to do before that time and gotta live the dream in this moment and share it with others!

My 2 cents.
~Charlene

Life's a Bi!ch when I don't get to dress ...............................Debra

Debra cant agree more. Ya get real cranky too !

~Char

[Marie-Claude, France]

In general, crossdressing helps me to be in good mood and to smile much often.
When I do not crossdress... I am not happy, and I feel very stressed. This can be read in my face and in my (bad) humour.

[Brandy]

I am generally okay for awhile if I'm not dressing, but after a certain point I get really antsy to dress again.

[Michelle 78]

Basically it gets me down when I can't dress, I want to do it so much it's unhealthy sometimes. I get withdrawn from everything and peed off very easily.

[Piora]

I once went 7 years without dressing. I had purged everything when my wife and I split. I never once even thought about dressing during that time. I always felt that something was missing, but was caught up in day to day life. I started up again after moving to the city I am now in, and immediately started to feel better about life in general. But 7 months ago, I quit the job I had and was unemployed for a while. I didn't spend anything on clothes, and just wore what I already had. Now that summer is here, I've stopped again. I certainly agree with the other girls saying that it affects them when they can't dress. To this day, I can't explain how I went for all those years and never even thought about buying anything girlie.

[DaphneMiller]

I haven't been able to dress for over three months now. I'm going insane. I can't stop thinking about it, I get depresssed, angry, grumpy, easily upset and burst into tears (never expected that one).
I'm looking forward to when I can let Daphne out again, and haven't been able to resist some retail therapy. Which just makes it worse, 'cos now I've got two gorgeous dresses I can't wear yet... Some mornings, I even get up, and instead of getting dressed for work, I briefly slip on a dress or skirt, in the wish that I could just keep it on.

sigh.

[WandaRae2009]

When my daughter was away at school I was able to dress every couple of weeks. Now with her graduated and home with her's and my son's schedules I go months without an opportunity to dress. I am getting quite stressed and irritable lately. I take every opportunity to dress even if only for an hour. I need to plan a femm get away to regain my sanity. or send the kids out of town.

[Samantha2015]

Maybe I'm lucky but I've never been depressed about not being dressed. I can be happy in dull old boring guy mode. I don't hate the male side of me. He's just a doofus. Until late last year I went many years without fully dressing, mostly because I had some form of facial hair going on. The bearded lady look is not a turn on for me.
I could get by in those years just by putting on heels & hose for a while until my feet hurt or just putting on fake nails. Get my femme fix and go about my day.
Sometimes I would just look at the girl stuff in the closet and that would make me happy, just knowing it was there.
Maybe getting older and testosterone levels dropping?? had something to do with my really getting back into dressing late last year? I've purchased more female stuff in the last 10 months than I have in the last 10 years. And you all have seen the brunt of it in my posts.
I'll ride the girl waves as long as they last. I'd say if you are getting depressed about not dressing try doing little things to remind you of it. If that doesn't do it maybe a
therapist could help. The true TG & TS issues are way over my head and I'm certainly not one to give advice on those topics.
Hoping you all have peace in your life.

[S. Lisa Smith]

Well... My experience is very different that most of the other girls. Every spring and summer I give up crossdressing. I'm at the beach, I go surfing and I am fine. In the late fall, I start dressing again and I am very happy to do so. I guess I am lucky not to suffer any adverse effects. I feel that I am dual natured anyway and my male side just comes out more in the summer.

[dominique]

I used to dress 5 days a week which was wonderful. Even a small break then would make me hyper sensetive. Now with my daughter in the house full time I found it got easier to repress the urge. But when she's out for a long period of time I take the chance to dress which is wonderful.

[jigna]

I never leave any chance to crossdress, when I am alone at home.

[Amanda_P]

I start having withdraws. I couldn't go into a store without browsing the womens section after a month. I don't even want to think about going longer

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi GM, I can't imagine not dressing for a few hours everyday.

[MissTee]

I have my ups and downs, my guy and girl. Currently, I am heading into week 4 of no dressings by choice. Just taking a break and really haven't missed dressing. I suppose it's knowing I can dress when I want to that allows me to simply relax and dress as the calling manifests itself.

[Cassandra*]

It drives me nuts. I actually have a skirt and blouse in the counsel of my ride and slip into it for the ride home from work. Unfortunately I'm a very hands on person and find myself assisting others( guys on they're hot rods) normally wearing jeans and t-shirts.

[Lily Catherine]

My longest ever hiatus –*in between pauses of a week on average – was one month for a work-related trip. I kept open the possibility of returning to it eventually at the time. The CDing fantasies got bad (and sometimes more stereotypical ) during that time, but there was no consequential mood change due to the anticipation of finally getting back to it.

With the recent spate of events after being outed by my family, however, the game must have changed. These few days I've become rather lethargic and melancholic, what with the talk from my family of how 'unbecoming' and 'shameless' I must have been to do such things. Which is especially odd considering I still wear a few pairs of women's jeans and jacket on occasion despite presenting male. I'm sure it's more than the clothes. It has to be more than the clothes. As of now, I'm still letting nature run its course (less the female presentation, make-up and wig).

[Tina_gm]

Thank you again for your replies and thoughts. I can say to some extent I sympathize with my own. However, what I have experienced also is a shift toward "feeling " overall more feminine. And on that note, I am off to start a thread on what feeling feminine means...