GG Has a Question.. Why the word Sissy??

[sometimes_miss]

I think that the use of the word sissy tends to reflect the guilt we feel about being girl-like. We're brought up to believe that it's the worst thing we can be, and indeed, so bad that some may need to imagine that a woman take the responsibility for our desires (forced feminization fantasies) or castigate us for wanting to be feminine, by referring to us in a demeaning term such as 'sissy'. I went through this stage when I was in adolescence, wishing my older sister and/or her friends, or a girl at school, would somehow discover that I was crossdressing and punish me by having me dress up and do what she told me, or challenge me to dress up as a girl and then hide my male clothing so that I couldn't change back, then tease me about secretly wanting to be a girl and referring to me as a sissy. All because we feel guilty about something that we shouldn't have to. 100 years ago, women were made to feel guilty about wearing pants. We've progressed past that. Maybe someday we'll be able to dress pretty without being made fun of. But I probably won't live long enough to see it.

[MissTee]

There are a whole lot of folk in the groups Iknow that would call a man dressing like a woman a sissy. Nothing really to do with little girls. I don't refer to myself as sissy, and find the term a bit demeaning.

[Valery L]

Such a beautiful word!, I do not see why it is a turn off for you.

[LexiNexi]

I like it because it's kind of degrading, but then again I am a masochist. I dress because it feels to be against the norm, I think.

[Sandie70]

The word "sissy" takes me back to the 1950's when kids would use the word as a dare... "go ahead and jump, don't be such a sissy." Kids back then usually used the word as a substitute for "scaredy pants" or "chicken" - equating timid behavior to be girly-like (sissy). This was so, even though I had a number of girl cousins who could whip my butt any day.

And then, as we got older it was a derogatory term for a boy who was effeminate - suggesting he was homosexual. And, of course, many gays also define extremely effeminate fellow gays as sissies.

Personally, I look at the word as offensive, and also misleading as far as crossdressers are concerned. If you inhabit an alter-ego as a woman, you are aiming to be effeminate, but could no more be called a "sissy" than a beautiful GG would. And if you called a GG a sissy, you can bet your bottom dollar she would be offended by the use of the word. When I dress, I feel like a woman - and would never venture that I, in any way, am a "sissy."

But when all is said and done... it's just a word. The only way it can hurt you is if you let it.

[Piora]

I hate the term with a passion. I agree with everyone else who are saying it's demeaning, because it is. Some clothing sites that cater specifically to crossdressers reference certain articles as "sissy". I just can't get past it.

[TrishaTX]

I have to be honest, i doesn't bother me. If that is what someone thinks of me fine...I don't see it as a bad or good word.

[Jazzy Jaz]

Although i have some fetish/submissive interests i dont care for the word, definately also turns me off, but to each their own and everyone has the right to identify themselves how they choose.

[Teresa]

Stacie,
First of all welcome, I hope you stick around for a while as we appear to be losing GG members, and I find it a bit of a leveler to get a GGs opinion when I question my wife's attitude to my CDing.

As many have said if the word is used in an abusive way then most of us will dislike it but that can apply to many words especially in our community !
Having your father call you a sissy was probably the biggest insult most young boys had to live with, you could always get back at school friends but not at your father !

Some actually enjoy being sissified and lets face when you visit those sites most are run by women who make good money out of it, I guess some enjoy it to satisfy their own kinks !
I'm guilty of a liking some of the frilly stuff as you'd find if you dig back in the picture section, I have fond memories of my sister's full petticoats and the feeling of all that froth around the knees !
I may ruffle a few feathers but when you look back women looked like women I don't mean that in a demeaning way, but after the austerity of the war women really jumped on the femininity band wagon which carried right through the sixties . It is slightly saddening to see how much fashion has changed, perhaps it will go full circle and women will tire of wearing trousers and jeans .
As I said in a thread a while ago the person you pass in the street must be a CDer because he's the only one wearing a skirt !

[NickyLycra]

I can see your point Stacie, and looking at it from your eyes, how could you not be repulsed.
Sadly much of society also attach those beliefs to very images you describe with all crossdressing.
I'm curious, when your SO came out to you were they the first images that came to mind for you?

Minorities have all had their fair share of twisted descriptions, if you choose to look hard enough it's possible to fill your head with all sorts of disasters.

However, on the other hand hopefully here in your search you can also find acceptance that the only difference between a guy wanting to be pretty and a woman wanting to be macho is your state of mind and your own personal beliefs. Both of which you have the choice to change if you're open to it.

[AnnieMac]

I agree that sisy is not an endearing term and I'm not into it at all. I have posted often about the lack of an endearing term for a male who has and wants the world to know he has feminine qualities and interests. Whether it is a andro/fem taste in clothes or if he is the male version of a tomboy.

That's because the general public does not find it endearing. I actually prefer the term sissy to transvestite. I find it a little cuter, and in no way offensive.

[JamieG]

Yes, there are definitely people who like the term and like to dress in over-the-top little girl fashions. However, I think it's a bit hypocritical for this community, to point at them and go, "Eww. Now those people are messed up." To each their own.

Personally, I dislike the term "sissy" with a passion. I'd rather be called "tranny" than "sissy," and that's saying something: unless it is used by good friends in a jocular manner, "tranny" is an extremely insulting word. This might be due to my personal history. I was often called a sissy as a kid, and I hated it so much, that I tried to bury all my feminine mannerisms for a long time.

[Robbin_Sinclair]

Sissy is one of those words that is very derrogatory. When said in the context of sexual arrousal, people find that it can be a turn on. Like "*****", "****", etc. It is part of role playing. Eventually, some may form this as an identity.

robbin

in edit,
p.s. I see two words did not print. They were the derrogatory terms for prostitute (beginning with a "w" and a four letter word for vile GG beginning with "s".
Always happy with this site. Very professional.

[Krisi]

It's a term used for a sexual fetish. I don't like or or use it. For me, dressing as a woman is not a sexual fetish. And I have no clothing that would not be worn by an adult woman under normal circumstances.

[Giselle(Oshawa)]

i too am offended by the term "sissy" many girls both ts's and cd's have served in combat missions in the military
and are anything but "sissy's"
i don't dress to "demasculate" myself but rather to match my feelings on the inside of me.

[Trishpdxcd2]

Hi Stacie,

I think it's been alluded to already here, 'sissy' is commonly used in a fetish or BDSM connotation as a particular style of dressing and activity...

We don't see it much around here but it will crop up a lot more on other sites that cater for that side of life... We tend to be more in the 'femulator' category here although we do support all sorts of crossdressers on the site... I think the BDSM lifestyle folk tend to be more into doing stuff than talking about what we chat about here... if you catch my drift... And yeah - does nix for me either, but to each their own...

Katey x

I think Katey summed it up really well. I associate it with a particular kind of fetish and to each their own. Many people associate dressing with a fetish and I understand that as well. Now if someone generally uses that term in reference to cd's then that is offensive and they need to be educated.

[Jaylyn]

I really don't like the term sissy because of my upbringing . A sissy was always the kid who couldn't or was too scared to to take the dare. We grew up thinks a person that was a scaredy cat. I now know that as has been said its a term also for a fetish type of CD. I think from searching other sites the dressing is more elaborate. Some even look child like. Really doesn't appeal to my tastes but I know my tastes in dressing doesn't appeal to others also. To each his own but remember we all are CD to an extent.

[Gwinnie]

I think it's similar to a racial slur in some context. But also a clothing style. I'll admit that if given the opportunity to wear one of those dresses in a safe environment I would jump at the chance. Absurd amount of ruffles, lace, puffy sleeves? Yes please!!!

Gwendolyn

[BillieJoEllen]

These days the term 'sissy' doesn't bother me. When I was growing up the term was applied to me probably thousands of times by relatives (some very close). I didn't know what to do. Inside I felt like a girl but my outward appearance said boy. I had no idea how to fix the problem. I believe my mother would tell certain people that I had to wear my sister's undies because my boy undies were dirty. I was baptized at three and a half years old wearing the prettiest most dainty gown one could imagine and it seemed like everyone knew that my mother would use me as a dress model for a girl cousin from time to time. There are numerous other instances that occurred also. I always strove to be as 'macho' as possible.

About 11 or twelve years ago or whenever the JCPenney company stopped selling wedding dresses and bridesmaids gowns I was down in their resale shop and noticed they had petticoats for sale for I think it was $6.00. Since I didn't have one I decided to buy one. I've always wanted to do and wear what girls wore when I was younger and petticoats were all the rage back when I was a young boy. After trying it on and wearing a full dress with it I was hooked on 'revisiting' my childhood. I came to realize that this was what they are now calling a sissy. So in that respect I don't really mind the term and don't\find it offensive at all. The term 'transvestite' I find to be the most offensive term in the English language.

[Cheryl T]

Stacie,
You are most certainly not alone. I totally dislike that term as it not only refers to those you mentioned that like the "little girl" look, but also in a derogatory way to all of us.
I dislike all labels in general, but this one in particular. Those that enjoy that style of clothing may or may not like the term, I don't know. If they enjoy dressing that way, good for them. We all have our specific tastes, but for the public to apply that term to all of us I find distasteful at the least.

[pamela7]

I don't think we should accept normal society's labels, especially old 1960's labelling of feminine males (sissy). The term these days means a particular form of dress and behaviour/sexual interaction, called sissy or cissy; we even have several maybe hundreds of members putting sissy into the name/id here.

So, while I don't like the term as used in school in the 70's, now its re-specified, its not a problem for me at all, and I don't feel we should judge anyone else here for using the word to describe their orientation. Same with other sub-genres, we accept and welcome all.

xxx Pamela

[linda booth]

I've bought a number of vintage clothing items from ebay. If the seller uses the term sissy, I don't go there. I find the term demeaning.

[Erika Lyne]

So, while I don't like the term as used in school in the 70's, now its re-specified, its not a problem for me at all, and I don't feel we should judge anyone else here for using the word to describe their orientation. Same with other sub-genres, we accept and welcome all.

I think this line from Pam says it best. The term of the 60s and 70s is a derogatory term for males who didn't fit into a stereotypical male mold or did not perform as brave. However, ther term has been "repurposed" and is now a welcomed title to those who like to dress in very frilly clothing, almost doll-like. I was on occation insulted as a child by being called a "sissy" and I would immediately retaliate in a very over-the-top aggressive manner.

Didn't get to do things like that when I WAS 12

Now, I also think that it may be true that at the time on our entering into awareness that boys and girls are dressed different that we, as CDers, never had the chance to live in that style of clothing. Judith96 has skimmed this thought by saying she "didn't get to wear these things when she WAS 12." I myself, have such a fixation but not to "Sissy" attire. (Although, I do wish I had the chance to "outgrow" the style.)

So, I think the term used in a derogatory manner is very much an insult. However, when used by someone to describe something about themself it is less insulting. It should not be used by someone outside of thier own labeling. Those on the other sites and even those here who say they are into the "Sissy" genre, we know what they are aiming for but THEY said it, THEY called themselves that, THEY are happy in the persona and it can be assumed that THEY are ok with the label.

I'm guessing that a comparison is the way that in certain circles of African Americans it is ok for them to call themselves a certain very derogatory word but NOT suitable for people outside their own circles to do so. I do not, will not and refuse to use the word specifically because I do not believe the current "purpose" of the word has any use in normal lexicon. "Sissy" too can be very derogatory word and is viewed as such by the general public, as it is to many on the forum here but if someone is referring themselves as such or referring to their clothing preferences as such then, who am I to judge? After all, I don't exactly subscribe to societal norms either.

I hope this helps and welcome to the site. It is very informative, sometimes opinionated but always supportive. Just remeber, you are not alone and we welcome a supportive GG SO. So, feel free to ask away. Just be ready to filter through many of the responses to find what fits your needs. Everyone's story is a little different and many have lots in common but it is your life as well as your SOs. You two need to live up to your needs.

-Erika

PS: another "repurposed" word: "ap" used to mean "appetizer" not a handy cell phone gadget-program! Language is always moving.

[LilSissyStevie]

A "sissy" is merely a male that engages in what is perceived as feminine behavior. Dressing up in women's clothing qualifies. The thugs on the playground in grade school didn't call me a sissy because I came to school dressed up like Little Bo Peep. It was because I cried when they punched me in the face. Real boys don't cry, only sissies and girls do. It's always fun to read the attempts to "other" sissies by defining them using the form: A sissy is [whatever I don't do.] There is no qualitative difference between a man that gets aroused dressing up like Bo Peep or a French maid and a man that gets a similar reaction from dressing up as a MILF (or GILF on this forum.) It's just a difference in style but not a difference of type.

Some of the responses in this thread inspired me to make my first caption:

addtext_com_MTEwMzU1MTA5NDYx (600x397).jpg

[Stacie_Kimmi'sGG]

I wanted to Thank Everyone for their response's to my question. Its been enlightening, and very interesting. I understand more , So many Tentacles to this...and diversity.
Huggs!!