You Goal as a Crossdresser

[Robin414]

Hmm, I think I'm transgender (pretty close to knowing) and my goal is really simple...I watched a documentary back in the late 70's about a trans woman. ..the interviewer asked her point blank..."but what if you're not pretty?" She just laughed, that's not the point! I just want to be recognized as a woman!

[Pump1]

I just dress for the fun of it. I don't try to emulate a woman. I just like the feeling of my dresses and hose and heels. No make up yet. Hopefully I will dabble in it soon.

Angela

[Joahnaxo]

My goal is to be able to step out en femme and be able to blend in with other woman I'm still a closet dresser but I'm dying to step out in my pumps

[Marcelle]

Hi Krisi,

I am going to have to disagree with you on this point. Women come in all shapes and sizes. I do not use padding (breast forms, hips, butt) because it just seems too laborious not to mention hot/uncomfortable to wear under clothing. Now my frame is on the small side for a man (5'6") but I have an athletic build (broader shoulders, narrow waist, guy arms/legs) but I believe I can pull off a narrow hipped/small chested woman quite well (fortunately I do have junk in the trunk which helps). If you put me side by side with my younger sister (we have compared BTW), while my build is more guy our figures are dead on 38A cup, 28 inch waist and 36 inch hips. Besides I have way too many face tells to worry about how my figure is perceived when out in public.

Cheers

Isha

[Krisi]

Well, I was trying to help but it looks like I brought out the haters instead.

If you think I'm wrong, that's fine. Some of you got it. And of course if you're not trying to pass as a woman, it's not important.

[Kelsey21]

Leave the house and blend in

[Marcelle]

Well, I was trying to help but it looks like I brought out the haters instead.

If you think I'm wrong, that's fine. Some of you got it. And of course if you're not trying to pass as a woman, it's not important.

Krisi,

I don't get where you are getting "the haters" from. You proposed that in order to truly pass as a woman you have to use padding to get an "hourglass" figure. Many here (myself included) disagreed because not every woman out there has an hourglass figure. It doesn't mean we are right and you are wrong or vice versa . . . it is an opinion based on what you posted.

Cheers

Isha

[Jenniferathome]

Well, I was trying to help but it looks like I brought out the haters instead.If you think I'm wrong, that's fine. Some of you got it. And of course if you're not trying to pass as a woman, it's not important.

Or just maybe, what you wrote was kind of lame.

[immike]

I'm thoroughly in the closet,total secrecy.I thoroughly enjoy sneaking into my mothers closet&trying on her dresses&heels

[Lorileah]

k kids...enough. Kristi just because someone disagrees with you doesn't make them a hater. We all have opinions. no one was "hating"

[stefan37]

I have what I think obvious male physiology. I have breasts from HRT that are accentuated by bras. I don't have a gut but I have a thick waist. I have no hips. I don't wear padding. I have thinning hair, but don't wear a wig. I pass well during casual encounters. Longer encounters people will usually figure something is a little off. It's not my body that gives me away. It's the subtle male tells I need to work on.
Living full time for 2 years. Visually in order, hair, facial features, beard shadow, body hair. Posture. Voice. Speaking patterns and inflections, mannerisms and a while bunch of subtle clues.
Best advice I can give is be confident in who you are. Be pleasant, smile alot. And have fun.

[ShelbyDawn]

Interesting thread.

As far as my "Goals as a Crossdresser," I don't have any. I have many personal goals and among them is finding the proper balance where crossdressing comes to play in my life.

It is my opinion but I kind of get the impression that that is what we are all looking for.
This balance will be different for each of us and harder to attain for most than it is for some.
I wish I could be Isha(My Idol) but that is not in the cards for me.

I tend to be fairly realistic and as such know I will never pass so I seek my balance in finding ways to express my need to wear women's clothing without disrupting the rest of my life.
I have tried the deep dive into passing; makeup, wig, etc., with poor results.
I have found a place where I am comfortable, get to feel a bit feminine in my daily life and nobody notices or seems to care about what I am doing.

I wear panties every day with bras that are easy to conceal with the right shirt. In fact, depending on the shirt, I can even get away with some padding in the bras(BONUS!!!).
I wear women's tank tops as undershirts and women's jeans and keep my toes painted with clear polish.

With all of this, I feel at peace with who I am. I have the balance I need.

I still want to be Isha.

[Angie G]

My goal is to enjoy the time I dress and that a bit better then about 70% of my time. I sometimes do make-up but it's just for me I don't go out. Only my wife really knows Angie.
Angie

[Lily Catherine]

My main goal, now that the burden of dressing is partially off my shoulders, is to come to terms with my identity. The act of cross-dressing in itself has fallen to secondary due to a hiatus, which leaves with me finding out my 'being' and where the balance lies. The environments I am in favour me opting for an extreme imbalance towards the masculine, but at what expense? I guess it'll be a long-term affair. Even in the wake of being outed by my family, they're increasingly skirting the topic these days, and likely don't want to know or see (any traces) of whoever-this-Lilian-person is. They've probably seen the "I'll be back soon. Love, Lilian" notes, however.

[IngeInCO]

My goal is to have fun and look pretty for me

[sometimes_miss]

Goals. Who knows. I'm certainly not a woman, but I'm not a man that women want, either. That kind of leaves me in limbo. So I guess I'm just trying to get through life with as little pain as possible, and hope for some brief moments of ecstasy along the way. In the meantime, I'll take solace in being able to dress in a way that makes me comfortable.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I agree. If one is seeking to be perceived as a woman, a certain amount of shaping is essential. The appearance of a waist and hips touches some primeval receptor in the brain. It may not totally offset other masculine features, but certainly helps set expectations.

Actually, studies have shown that the best waist to bust ratio is 0.7, but that for picking a mate for propagating the species. Fortunately, women come in all different shapes and sizes and different looks. I've seen many GGs with a very masculine face. How did I know they were GGs? I didn't actually. I took my best guess.

I think the Steff person inside of me is happier, more fun and more extroverted. I like to create the illusion of looking like a girl, but I'm only willing and able to accept minor modifications. I'm not in a position to shave my arm or body hair; I have very little natural hair left so a wig is required; I'm not in a position to pierce my ears, so I wear clip on earrings.

But, I still try to make the best girly presentation. I wouldn't go out as a man in a dress, without forms, a wig and makeup. Usually I pad butt and sometimes hips, but occasionally I go out without any hip or butt padding.

[Kevyn53]

Passing to me just happened a few days ago. If you're in a ladies room and you get "hon" from a GG, you're ok. Shape doesn't matter. I was in skinny jeans, low heels, a pink top and just minot jewelry. The way most CDs get read is they they are WAY overdressed for 2015.

[Jessica5536]

I'm just trying to figure that out myself.
From a very young age I wished that I was a beautiful woman.
Right now, just being somewhat passable would be a huge boost for my self esteem as a person.

[franlee]

I can answer this very easily, to make Me happy. Anything extra is just icing on the cake.

[OCCarly]

No goal. Just enjoying the trip.

[irene9999]

No "end game" per se, just enjoy looking pretty from time to time

[Krisi]

Some of us do, Krisi... Many of us take photos from the front and sides also... A few of the braver souls (and those looking for encouragement and advice for development) actually post them here too...

Curiously, I see that you yourself have posted........... Zero pics (other than your avatar)

Care to share your secrets with the members here...?

Couldn't sharing just help everyone understand what you're getting at? A picture being worth a thousand words and all...



Katey x

Wrong! This is what I meant by "bringing the haters out". There are "nice" ways to disagree with someone and there are "not nice" ways.

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ght=veronica+5

Why haven't I posted more pictures here? Because, having been in the IT and computer field, I realize that once you post anything on the Internet, you lose all control over it. Sure, you have to join this forum and make a certain number of posts before you can see other member's pictures, but there's no test to see if a new member is actually a crossdresser. Anyone could pretend to be one.

And even if one is truly a crossdresser, it's a simple process to copy a picture from this site to a personal computer and then publish it somewhere else. Facebook, for an example.

While I would find it uncomfortable to be "out" to family, friends and even neighbors, I keep my dressing private for my wife's sake.

[Katey888]

OK Krisi - I'm big enough to apologise for being wrong about you posting pics... you've posted at least one view from behind.

I really don't understand the 'hater' comment though... I disagree with your rather dogmatic view (as do many others here) that your way and perspective is the only way and the rather dismissive way that you treated one member's experience and presentation as part of a makeover, and the further inference that other crossdressers who present as a 'man in a dress' in public do so only - as you say - "to see how people react." If that isn't intolerant or misunderstanding I don't know what is...?

Perhaps you could be prepared to be a bit more broadminded about the mixed motivations that drive an extremely varied and diverse community - understanding why other people are motivated to do similar things has helped me be more accepting about myself and how much of individuals we are. I'm sorry if you think my way of disagreeing is "not nice" but I will use what limited free speech we have here to call out dogma and closed-mindedness... You have a right to your opinion just as everyone else here has a right to challenge it.

Now, what exactly is it that I'm supposed to be hating... Please do explain...?

Katey

[Lee Andrews]

My goal is to one day spend some time as Lee at Fantasy Fair or the like and not give two farts whether I come close to passing or not.