Are there times when crossdressing is not really crossdressing?

[ShelbyDawn]

I have a question for you. I am curious to see what everybody has to say and before you reply, please take a minute to really think about what I am asking.

So let me lay a little background... I was shopping a few weeks ago and came across an awesome sale in Old Navy. They had their women's tank tops on sale for $3.00 a piece which is a great bargain; usually 8.50, I think. Anyway, I bought every extra large they had. I wear them as regular undershirts. They fit as well as the ones made for men I used to get from Hanes but the fabric is much softer and I think they last better, too.

And so, I got to thinking, is wearing these tank tops really crossdressing. On the one hand, the answer is absolutely 'yes.' They are women's clothes and I am a man wearing them. On the other hand, they are fairly androgynous by design and the reason I wear them is because they really are much more comfortable than the male counterpart. Is it more crossdressing if I wear a pink one than a black or grey or white? How might this apply to other articles of clothing. What if our choice to wear panties is because they are just plain more comfortable(they are) or what about the choice to wear, say, women's jeans. This could apply to pretty much anything we wear.

On a larger scale, does the reason we choose to wear women's clothes really matter. I don't have "the" answer and if you have been around this forum for any length of time, you are pretty aware that the reasons we dress are as numerous as the members of this forum. I hope I am not starting a flame war or anything. I really think this is an interesting concept and I am hoping for an intelligent discussion.

So, what do you think???

[NicoleScott]

I don't underdress. It just doesn't have any appeal for me. I bought a waist clincher for a little smoothing and shaping while CDing and discovered that it made my back feel good, so I started wearing it (and I bought two more) every day, under my guy clothes, but I don't consider it underdressing because I get no crossdressing enjoyment as I do when transforming. So it's crossdressing, but not really.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Shelby, There's another thread here started by Abigail, that suggests that this is Gender Bending.

[Tracii G]

Why worry if it is or not if you like it wear it.

[suchacutie]

From my perspective, I'm crossdressing when my intent is to present Tina to the world. When I wear a pair of jeans made for women, but I'm presenting male, those jeans are androgenous, and in no way imply that I am presenting as a girl.

The issue for me is not who the clothes we're designed for, but how I am using them to present. I'm sure there will be differing opinions, but this is my perspective on my actions.

[kimdl93]

It's all in the mind.

[lily1974]

Well for me when I get up in the morning and put on my favorite panties, I am not crossdressing. I am wearing what is comfortable. However if I put on the matching bra then I consider it cross dressing. Simply because bras are not generally seen as mans clothing.
So I guess what I am saying is it just depends on how the clothes make me feel.

[Erica Marie]

I dont consider myself crossdressing, I wake up, put on my boyshort panties, I wear womens jeans and carhart work pants, I wear womens hoodies. Who cares its just cloths. No one complains when a women wears mens flannel shirts, or anything else. Lets just call it getting dressed and leave it at that. Wear what is comfortable and be yourself.

[Diane Smith]

I always wear women's trouser socks (they cover more of my calves than regular guy socks, so no white skin showing when I cross my legs), and women's cotton microfiber panties, every single day. Since the intention isn't to appear female, I regard these as practical wardrobe decisions that are the most comfortable choices for me. I'm pretty sure, though, that I wouldn't have discovered these items, or had the nerve to buy and wear them, if I didn't already have experience shopping in the women's departments -- so in that respect, my crossdressing has influenced my presentation even if it's not really the prime motivator.

- Diane

[pamela7]

Answering the OP seriously, technically it is underdressing, a little aspect that many CD'ers do to feel femme connection when "forced" to present in guy mode. So I say it is crossdressing, just not going the whole way. I've done this a lot the last few months, as well as presenting more andro but in all-female clothing. I have been told a few times that people think I'm gay or bi by dressing andro-fem.

For me, the panties and vests are way more comfortable than manclothes. I really have no idea when or whether a situation might arise that would mean i'd ever wear mens underwear again.

This is one deep rabbit hole we inhabit!!!!

[Teresa]

Shelby,
First of all can I pose you a question ?
I've just taken a pair of male knee length navy shorts which I never wear because they're too big and carefully altered them into a very wearable skirt . If that was the first item of female clothing does that suddenly make me a CDer as they were once male shorts ?

What we choose to wear really doesn't matter the problem comes when others can't understand why we want to do it ! Sometimes we assume and overthink it all but if you happen to be in a DADT situation the thinking isn't always logical behind the objections ! Often our partners struggle far more with what other people think than we do .

Then there are the problems of why we dress, we may tell our partners that this is as far as it goes but then struggle to stay within those boundaries ! I can't honestly answer where that push keeps coming from all I know is it's very hard to stop it sometimes.

I don't know if anyone has actually tried to assess how many different reasons why we CD, we all have the one thing in common but travel on different roads with it !

I know my dressing is mostly sexual but the gender question is becoming a bigger issue . Others do treat as a hobby , I had great difficulty coming to terms with that one because of the struggles I've had with it !

[Claire Cook]

Hi Shelby,

Very interesting question! If "crossdressing" is defined as wearing clothes appropriate for the other gender, then I guess wearing any female things (eg panties) qualifies. I always wear panties and usually a bra, no matter what is on the outside. So am I crossdressing all of the time? Funny thing is that now it seems so natural for me to be completely en femme (I mean me) that I don't feel like I am crossdressing -- I'm wearing my clothes. So if we feel female on the inside, which gender is appropriate?

Watson, deep waters indeed. Mind your dive tables. Claire need another cup of coffee...

[Belle Cri]

I've thought about the thread and the original question. I suppose much of where my comfort zone falls within the "andro" zone. Pardon if my nomenclature is not current, that's always frustrating to me. I can take the exact same outfit and make it ultra femme, maybe somewhat neutral, or butch. It depends on well, style and attitude. If that's merely gender bending, ok, but for me that is an external definition. I wear the same tanks, and I can turn every head on the block or go completely anonymous.

As Pamela noted - "I have been told a few times that people think I'm gay or bi by dressing andro-fem." I get this all the time. Even when I'm openly an obviously a feminized male, my SO with me at my side, I will get hit on constantly.

So is that cross dressing, really? Well, I don't know. For me it was a substituted way of asking "am I bisexual?" When my honest answer came back that, yes I am, and with my lovely SO's full backing and support, I will dress to attract men as well as women - most particularly her. Do I love turning a head when I am even somewhat tricked out? Yes, I love it. Now I catch a lot of guff and angry stares, but that is their problem, not mine. So to turn back to the OP's first question - what other people perceive of my dress or my sexuality, rightly or wrongly, is really none of my business. And to me, my decision to accept or not to accept a pre-defined definition for myself and my own sexuality is none of their business either. Who cares - be gorgeous and fabulous, be gay straight or omnivorous, but do it for yourself.

[Charona]

The first time I tried pantyhose, it was definitely cross-dressing. Now, I use them as a base layer in winter. I also ues women's knee-highs as socks, because I hate thick socks and they are the thinnest I can find (not to mention they stay up when I wear boots).

The Army and the Air Force have distinctive dress uniforms for men and women. But the fatigue uniforms and flight suits are made for men, and women are simply issued smaller sizes as appropriate. Are the women being forced to cross-dress? Remember that forced cross-dressing was one of the reasons Jeanne d'Arc was burned at the stake.

[Krisi]

There is no set definition of "crossdressing" so it can be what you want it to be. Well, wearing breast forms and a frilly dress is definitely crossdressing but wearing jeans or T shirts from the women's department might not be unless they are overly feminine.

It's only important if you make it important.

[Pat]

I've been down this philosophical path before and my final answer was that it's crossdressing if you think it is. And it's not if you think it's not. Part of my reasoning is that when I was a teen the Hippies (and dinosaurs) were roaming the earth and I took up their dressing habits. I wore the beads, I wore the leather wristbands and sandals, wore my hair long etc. And even though I bought my hippie garb from the "men's" bin I was in a pretty constant thrill-state because internally it appealed to me as women's clothing. I was crossdressed (in my mind) while I was fully dressed in men's attire. It was the most awesome time of my life. But even before that, my first piece of crossdresser clothing I bought for myself was a Boy Scout ring -- the reason was that I came from a very strict background where men *did not* wear jewelry of any kind. But I bought that ring and wore it -- which in my mind was something only women were allowed to do -- and I got that thrill. I was crossdressing right out there in the open even though nobody else knew it.

So, yeah, you're crossdressing. Unless you think you're not.

[paulaprimo]

I wonder how joe Namath would answer this question when he was wearing pantyhose in the early 70's...

[Alice Torn]

paulaprino, Good question about BROADway Joe! The Namath the game was football.

[Charona]

I wonder how joe Namath would answer this question when he was wearing pantyhose in the early 70's...

I'm quite sure that Broadway Joe got paid well for those commercials. There were some rumors that he wasn't the only one, either. It was said that some players wore pantyhose for the little extra warmth in outdoor games. It was also said that some wore support pantyhose for the little bit of extra protection they might provide in a tackle. I can imagine the locker room even now...

[Rhian]

I only consider myself to crossdressing when I am trying to present as or feel female. I wear women's leggings, jeans and t-shirts in boy mode but don't consider it to be crossdressing.

[Sandie70]

In Walmart last week I found some tank tops in the men's section that seemed to be identical to some I saw in the women's section, except they were of larger sizes. Interestingly, there was a selection of them in pink.

I wanted to buy some of the pink ones, but sadly, all those in my size were already sold. Makes me think there are some other crossdressers shopping at my store...lol.

And now that I think of it, I seem to be seeing a fair amount of men's clothes in colors that used to be found only in the women's section. Is there a revolution going on?

[Teresa]

Sandie,
No they're just colour blind !

I count myself lucky that I can go to the women's section and pick out a size 12 (UK sizing) top or skirt and they fit !

[pamela7]

And now that I think of it, I seem to be seeing a fair amount of men's clothes in colors that used to be found only in the women's section. Is there a revolution going on?

Yes, there is, its happening here too, annoying as the colours dont come with fabric feel nor femme look, and the femme clothes are butching - bad news!

[wilt575]

It's all in the mind.

I agree with that all the way. Like the OP said its more fit and comfort. One or two things are okay depends on how your trying to present. If head to toe yes it's CDing or something like heels, hoop earrings etc again yes.

[Kate Simmons]

I personally think it's whatever we want it to be. We bought the stuff, right?