I am TG in transition

[MsVal]

Compared to some, my experience is quite devoid of drama. It actually makes for a pretty boring story, so I will save you the mundane details. See my earlier posts, if you wish to know them.

As of a couple weeks ago, my dear wife is on board for a disclosure to our family that I am TG in transition. I've set aside the week of August 9 for individual disclosures. My therapist and hers are aware and ready to assist us.

Each of our several children (all adult, most married) and spouse will come at an appointed time, agree not to discuss this with anyone else until the following weekend, and receive the message directly from me. My dear wife will be by my side. We expect some of the children will be receptive, and one or two will need time to get used to the idea.

I want to have helpful reference material available for them. I will appreciate recommendations for those materials.

Best wishes
MsVal

[Rianna Humble]

Not exactly reference material, but you might find the "Coming Out Letters" sticky thread gives you some food for thought

[Janice Ashton]

Hi Val

I recently come out to the workforce and used some of the content from the 'Coming Out Letters' (as mentioned above by Rianna) to advise staff of my Gender and future intent. I did not give out letters to everyone, instead I read out my declaration to what I must say was a hushed group of employees.
I have to say some of the content of the letters was very helpful so it maybe worth you having a look and adapting as you see fit?
Good luck I hope all goes well..

[Bria]

Good luck with the reveal Ms Val.

Hugs, Bria

[Leah Lynn]

I wish you well. Relax, it'll be fine.

Hugs,

Leah

[Debb]

In addition to my own letter:

http://community.pflag.org/document.doc?id=921 (Our Trans Loved Ones)
http://community.pflag.org/document.doc?id=494 (Faith in our Families) -- for faith-based questions
https://sait.usc.edu/lgbt/files/ResourcePDFs/OTC.pdf (Our Trans Children) -- if any of your reveals are to parents

My letter was very long and seemed to confuse one or two of my relatives who were more interested in reading between the lines .. something I totally didn't want.

[Rianna Humble]

Almost forgot to mention the Useful Links sticky thread

[Eringirl]

Good luck Val. Hope it goes well. Keep us in the loop.


.....and there is nothing wrong with a mundane life !!!

Best,

Erin

[Krisi]

I hope it goes well.

[emma5410]

Good luck! Most of the people I told reacted so well I wondered if they had actually heard what I had said.

[Marcelle]

Good Val,

Take things slow, give them time to digest and don't be surprised if they need a bit of time to ponder. Coming out to others is never easy and family is probably the hardest (been there) but for the most part they were all wonderful. Good luck and let us know how it went.

Cheers

Isha

[MsVal]

I knew that I could count on the wonderful girls of CD.COM to help me find the information I need, and there is a lot of information to digest.

Thank you, too for the well wishes. I am quite aware of others' disclosure and have no expectation that mine will somehow be vastly different. The disclosure will be at least uncomfortable, at worst very painful. On paper it looks to be a lose-lose proposal with only limited benefit to me.

I had an aunt who had breast cancer. She was aware of her lump but told no one about it. She kept that knowledge to herself. As time went on, the cancer grew to a point where the cancer had come to the surface in a smelly, oozing mess. When it could no longer be denied and the pain was no longer bearable, she finally told her family. By that time it was too late. She died soon after, leaving a grieving family and a distraught husband who took his own life within the year.

I am not comparing my situation to theirs but use it as an example of the foolishness, and ultimate cruelty of non-disclosure in the mistaken effort to avoid the pain.

Best wishes
MsVal

[Suzanne F]

Val,
Many of us have been through what you are facing. Breathe and be calm and just tell the truth. Remember you cannot control anyone's reaction to your news. I suspect it will be ok. Plus we will be here to help you through it! Good luck mad I look forward to your freedom to be you!
Suzanne

[flatlander_48]

V:

You have determined your path, which by itself is no mean feat. Good for you!

I think Life is about evolution and the trick is to keep moving. Sometimes progress is swift, but at other times it is barely perceptible. But, as always, if you keep moving, you will get there; wherever your There is...

DeeAnn

[Claire Cook]

Dear Val,

A big step indeed and I wish you all of the best. Do keep us updated.

Claire