Sure

[STACY B]

Agreed Reine, An don't get me wrong on this,, I am not saying all of us or even most of us will transition, I was saying that be careful of what your sure of today. Because believe it or not no matter how sure someone is today that's not what they are so sure about the next day.

An I mean Dead sure as all Hell sure today,, An they push and push more over time and after awhile it's apparent that the line in the sand moves for some of us. And the more you get away with the more it comes out and the more you learn about Yourself that you didn't even know was there until YOU got there. Make sense?

So anyway, I am talking to the one right now that maybe first starting or maybe a little further along and are Sure of it in the moment which is right now,, Just don't discount anything as being to far fetched. What I mean is people that are new or kinda new think of the Total extreme of this instead of the real truth which is Baby steps to get where the old Trans folk are. Not from CDing strait to Transition like it was some kind of Magic trick.

You have many conversation and choices and action of real life that will have to come together before anything of this nature will happen to you and none of them will happen over night . This takes time and with the world changing and gaining more acceptance over time I hope that more people don't have to endure what us Old Lady's had to endure with all of this.

You stop and think about the past for a second,, You couldn't have gotten away with half the stuff you do now. Past 10 or 20 years have been a god send for the trans folk,, Medical support alone is worth it's weight in Gold. Where I am from 30 years ago they would have locked you up for this stuff,,lol,,,,

[Abby Kae]

As one of the new ones, who went straight from wanting to CD to full on TS in a very short time span (less than three months from saying, "I want to dress up," to, "I am a woman."), I'm feeling a bit defensive about compelled to respond to this, even though I know it comes from a good place with good intent.

For me personally, I have torn down the floodgates in a timeframe that many people think is brash and reckless, and they're not wrong. I am brash and reckless. When summer first started, I was still so deep in denial that I would have told anyone who asked that I loved being male.

But when those walls started coming down, one after the other like quick-paced dominoes, and I felt more and more RIGHT and at peace internally, I knew that I couldn't deny the truth any longer; I was born into the wrong body. I'm incredibly satisfied knowing that, because I'm finally free of the chains and depression that have been holding me back my whole adult life. In the last week, I've been happier and more productive than in the last year. Just because I finally know who I am.

I've challenged my therapist (who seems way more competent than at first glance) to help me uncover any doubts or fears that I may still be repressing, because I logically understand the scope of what I'm doing, even if I may not have fully internalized the difficulty. I hope he helps me find issues, but I don't believe he will. I'm open to it, but I'm also very confident that my stated truth is the right one for me.

I would like to find cracks in the walls, chinks in the armor, sand under the foundation, mud in the water, or whatever other analogy can be used here, if only for the sake of getting all the repairs done at once...

But I don't feel broken anymore. For the first time in my entire life, I am whole and complete in myself. It's strange, to be happy like this, knowing all the trauma that's coming, but I AM happy. And in that happiness lies a surety that I'm doing the right thing for me.

I wasn't sure before. I am now, and I don't feel like there's anything left to be unsure about. I've discovered how deep the rabbit hole goes; I don't see how it could possibly be any deeper. Is there anything left down there? Something more than changing, completely, the physical gender I was born with to match the gender I have in my brain?

[debstar]

if our society took it for granted that not everyone is born in the right body and it should be expected that some people will want to switch once they are old enough, then I think that most TSs would make the switch a lot earlier than they do. There wouldn't be as much "hoping I'm just a CDer".

At this stage I am genuinely hoping I am just a CDer! - not that I have anything against TG's at all but I feel the emotional whirlwind. While my mind may be going down the long path to TG for me at this stage I am feeling I would love to be (quote un quote ) normal, but I am not sure I am able to be 'normal' any more. and for who it's definitely not for me, I am trying to please other people.

Appreciate the sentiment from STACY B that the TG forum is open and welcoming to CD persons because I feel that CD is a gateway to discovering a TG side of Themselves.

I feel that even the stupid questions I ask on TG are a way to help me figure out who I am and it has been lovely getting some genuine responses even though I am not able to form my questions particularly well.

Love you all.

[Badtranny]

Excellent post Abby, but don't be defensive. It won't serve you well on the road you're about to travel.

and Jemstar, of course the TS forum is open to all for discussion. Just don't come in here making ridiculous statements like "GD will never go away".
You can say YOUR'S hasn't gone away, but we get a little testy when people try to advise others on things they haven't even done themselves. I think people like you deserve better than that.

[ReineD]

Appreciate the sentiment from STACY B that the TG forum is open and welcoming to CD persons because I feel that CD is a gateway to discovering a TG side of Themselves.

It would be interesting to know roughly the percentage of TSs who honestly believed themselves to be CD for a number of years. I think it's false to assume they all do, if this is what you are saying (I may be misunderstanding your 'gateway' term). Maybe we could take a poll.

[Kimberly Kael]

The past I am relatively certain about. The future? Not so much. Reine chimed in earlier today with a view I subscribe to wholeheartedly: there's enough riding on the admission that one is transsexual that virtually no one is going to come to that conclusion until they're ready to do something about it.

Don't make promises you can't keep. To yourself or your partner. Correspondingly, no one should expect a promise made under duress to mean much.

[debstar]

It would be interesting to know roughly the percentage of TSs who honestly believed themselves to be CD for a number of years. I think it's false to assume they all do, if this is what you are saying (I may be misunderstanding your 'gateway' term). Maybe we could take a poll.

Hi ReineD, no I was not implying that all CD's would be latent TG's.. I only meant that it is cool that this forum is not CD only or TG only.. it allows a fluid path for all peoples to go between. I agree that many CD's are happy not to transition but that the TG forum exists here at all is like a little welcoming gateway for those interested in exploring that side of themselves.

and Jemstar, of course the TS forum is open to all for discussion. Just don't come in here making ridiculous statements like "GD will never go away".
You can say YOUR'S hasn't gone away, but we get a little testy when people try to advise others on things they haven't even done themselves. I think people like you deserve better than that.

Hi Badtranny, I TRY to not make ridiculous statements but can not offer a guarantees as I am genuinely naive and expect to have many more posts deleted by admins before I come to understand the community and myself for that matter.

I respect you and am sorry if you feel I was saying my GD has not gone away? or that I was not respectful, that was not my intention nor my wording in any case. I was merely talking from my personal voice / feelings.

As I have mentioned we should accept the silly and seemingly hurtful things people say because often ( as am I ) people are ignorant and just genuinely wish to learn

[Badtranny]

As I have mentioned we should accept the silly and seemingly hurtful things people say because often ( as am I ) people are ignorant and just genuinely wish to learn

LOL, I wasn't talking about anything YOU said.

I was saying that people like you (curious and questioning) deserve better than to have people who haven't transitioned come into the TS forum and just make stuff up.

[Inna]

it is quite devastating that all the new born potential for truth is quickly stifled and squashed by pressures of conformity brought onto oneself by the environment of (loving?) caring parents, religion, pear pressure, etc.
we are conditioned to defend our selves from the get go instead of celebrating our perfection.
How can anyone wonder then that we are soooo SURE about the place in time we occupy at present, it is instilled in our psyche to be sure, to be strong, to be undeniable.
Only when pain within overpowers the dam built around the false pretense, only then the flood waters of truth swell and burst out in unstoppable flood.
To embrace the truth is to open one self to being in state of love, and not to defending or defining...

[kimdl93]

Crushingly real!