I Got Married!

[Katie7]

So, I got married to the love of my life. I told her about my CDing about a year before we got engaged. She is accepting, however, finding the whole thing hard to deal with from time to time. She’s finding the thought of me ever wanting to transition very stressful yet invites me to go to have our eye brows done before the wedding. Every now and then we get our nails done but I have to make sure they are not showing for too long.
As you might have read from my previous posts, she has never seen me dressed yet, and have asked to see me dressed. but we never got round to experience it. I don’t think we are ready for it yet. However I experienced a couple of interesting incidents:

- one day she had to go to the dentist early morning and I just tought she went to work. Since I start work later in the day I though I got some time to dress up. I was in my girly pyjamas in bed and all of of the sudden she walk in the door! she was coming back from the dentist to pick some stuff up before going to work. oooops! I went under the duvet and asked her not to look at me. I was very embarrassed. She didn’t say anything and the hole thing passed. she never mentioned anything about it.

- One other time she was complaining how men would stare at her while she is running at the park. She was trying to get my opinion about how to avoid the situation. So she started her sentence by saying: “If you were a man ….” we both looked at each other an laughed


We have our ups and downs, tough we try to manage our relationship and survive. Its a way to go and I’m making one step at the time


P.S. I haven’t tried the wedding dress yet!

[marie123]

Congrats!!!!

[RADER]

Katie;
If you do try a wedding dress, please do not try her dress.
You and your marriage will live a lot longer and happier if you
try on a different dress. Good Luck.
Rader

[Jazzy Jaz]

Unless SHE wants you to.

[Rachelakld]

Well done,
I didn't wear my wife's wedding dress until about 2 days after the wedding, finally had no relatives or kids to see me dressed on the hotel balcony.

[Marcelle]

Hi Katie,

Congrats on the nuptials. Even though your wife is supportive to a degree, always keep the communication lines open and discuss. Speaking from personal experience it is very easy for each to misinterpret body language, bad days or just silence as having to do with something about CDing.

Cheers

Isha

[alwayshave]

Katei, Congratulations on your marriage. Let us know when you get your hands on the dress.

[pamela7]

sounds wonderful, congratulations. To keep it wonderful, talk, don't hide anything, and keep respecting her needs and desires too.
xxx Pamela

[Katey888]

Congratz Katie!

Just take your time and let things develop... regular life is full of enough stresses without adding others...

Katey x

[Brooke B]

Congratulations girl!

[CourtneyBme]

Congratulations! Best wishes to you and yours

[franlee]

Well done,
I didn't wear my wife's wedding dress until about 2 days after the wedding, finally had no relatives or kids to see me dressed on the hotel balcony.

Me too except it was a little longer before I got into theirs.

[Nadya]

I recently got married too! Congratulations! I've told my wife about this before proposing when I thought I was a crossdresser and she needed some time to get used to it. I have progressed since then with therapy and realized I am transgender and would like to go on hormones which has been difficult for her but she seems to be coming around. It will take time I think for her to be comfortable with it I think and so we're taking things slowly. I'm not sure if that's where you want to go but I think no matter what the situation, it's probably best to take things slow and keep the lines of communications open with her. Good luck! <3

[Katie7]

Thank you for kind wishes. Yes, communication is the key and I'm trying to keep her in the loop as much as I can. We are also looking into getting some counseling as well.
BTW, I wont be trying the dress any time soon. As I wont be able to put it on on my own! I need her to help me with it

Katie x

[CONSUELO]

Good luck to you both. As I read your post however I wondered whether your soon-to-be spouse truly understands what she is taking on.

[Katie7]

I don't think any of us truly understand what the future holds for us and I'm not sure if she knows what she truly is taking on. However, our life/marrige is something worth giving a shot for both of us. We see too many good things in each other. I hope CDing or any future developments (which may or may not arise) don't become an issue.

Katie x

[Joe Ann Miles]

Hi Katie.

Gongrats to the 3 of you. .-) I`m sure, she loves you big time

Hugs and best luck

Joe Ann

[naomi2009]

It's the little moments like you mention there, they make the difference. Moments of acceptance, humour... there will be many more of these, and one day these little moments will turn into bigger moments which you can truly treasure forever. Congratulations on your wedding x

[Lyla]

Congrats Katie!

[lacey.manin]

Congratulations Katie,
You are very lucky to have an understanding SO.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

...she started her sentence by saying: “If you were a man ….”

I would see this as a classic Freudian slip, and take it as a very strong warning. You were honest with her from the get-go, which is good. But I think she is unprepared for the longer term repercussions of how your crossdressing will impact her. I mean that she's ok with it in principle, but isn't/wasn't equipped to really understand what that might come to mean to her. I mean no disrespect to her- we are all struggling to know ourselves better and to be the best partner we can.

Safeguard yourself by being as traditionally masculine with her as you can most of the time. Be strong and focused, decisive; be the dominant partner in sex - to whatever extent she responds to - and keep Katie out of the bedroom. Don't drool openly over a pair of pink leggings in a shop window, don't start incorporating items of female clothing into your normal daily wardrobe and putting on coloured nail varnish in the evenings. Don't start thinking of her as a sister.

While there's absolutely nothing wrong with doing any of these things, if your SO is ok with it - and some members have SOs who are - she may go beyond her true comfort level in order to try to please you, because she loves you, and she is a generous, reasonable person. Be wise- stay well back from her comfort edge, give it a lot of time- and get your jollies in private and by coming here.

If you ignore this Freudian warning, you risk her getting out of her depth and becoming anxious about where your dressing might be leading, ie, away from her.

Hugs, Nikki

[grace7777]

I hope things work out well for the both of you.

We are also looking into getting some counseling as well.

In my opinion you should have gotten counseling before you got married. Counseling could have helped you both to understand what you where getting into before you got married.

[mikayla1964]

congrats Katie I hope the 2 of you or actually the 3 of you have a life long marriage. And the u all remain in loves blissfulness..

[gailwisher]

I believe Nikki has very good solid advice that I follow. I can dress and wear panties and tights and hose but if I wear a push up bra with cleavage I upset the balance of my wife's view. She loves males and enjoy being with them but each woman has a cross-dressing feeling she permits (different for every one) and a place which upsets her view of you.

I would see this as a classic Freudian slip, and take it as a very strong warning. You were honest with her from the get-go, which is good. But I think she is unprepared for the longer term repercussions of how your crossdressing will impact her. I mean that she's ok with it in principle, but isn't/wasn't equipped to really understand what that might come to mean to her. I mean no disrespect to her- we are all struggling to know ourselves better and to be the best partner we can.

Safeguard yourself by being as traditionally masculine with her as you can most of the time. Be strong and focused, decisive; be the dominant partner in sex - to whatever extent she responds to - and keep Katie out of the bedroom. Don't drool openly over a pair of pink leggings in a shop window, don't start incorporating items of female clothing into your normal daily wardrobe and putting on coloured nail varnish in the evenings. Don't start thinking of her as a sister.

While there's absolutely nothing wrong with doing any of these things, if your SO is ok with it - and some members have SOs who are - she may go beyond her true comfort level in order to try to please you, because she loves you, and she is a generous, reasonable person. Be wise- stay well back from her comfort edge, give it a lot of time- and get your jollies in private and by coming here.

If you ignore this Freudian warning, you risk her getting out of her depth and becoming anxious about where your dressing might be leading, ie, away from her.

Hugs, Nikki

[Katie7]

Safeguard yourself by being as traditionally masculine with her as you can most of the time. Be strong and focused, decisive; be the dominant partner in sex - to whatever extent she responds to - and keep Katie out of the bedroom. Don't drool openly over a pair of pink leggings in a shop window, don't start incorporating items of female clothing into your normal daily wardrobe and putting on coloured nail varnish in the evenings. Don't start thinking of her as a sister.

Thanks Nikki, this I thing is the best advice anyone has ever given me. Though, its very hard to follow. Sometime the pink fog is too strong for me and the urge to have girly times is not easy to dismiss. All I can do is to try my best.

Katie x