Would you press the button?

[Tracii G]

No way sister I love being me.

[Lily Catherine]

Short answer: no way.

I would make a visible distinction between possessing a desire to dress and acting on said desire. The latter being both simpler and easier to control.

From how I read it, it sounds like only the impulse to dress and memories of dressing are removed. However, even when I as an individual cross-dress or admit to dressing, those affected and/or involved are also impacted. The proverbial bell has already been rung anyway.

On my part I have sustained going without dressing for a couple of months so far, restraining the external behaviour as much as I could. But the thoughts recur regardless, something I have been willing myself to control in the face of loved ones' disapproval. It was definitely my fault I didn't come to terms with it swifter; part of me must have depended on the clothes too much.

Of course the hours and energy I have spent as Lilian could well have been replaced by something else and I could well have turned out someone else otherwise. But life has dealt me this hand, and I'm not sure what the Lilian-shaped hole would be otherwise filled with. I have chosen to deal with this to the best of my abilities; I wouldn't press the button.

[AltairaMorbius]

If I could, "You can completely wipe off of your life all the male impulses and all the memories that you have been a male. All that you have to do it to push this button."

Cheers,
Amy

[Jennifer B]

I love the replies by 'Kaze_' & 'Valery L.'

For me I would not press the button. I've spent years doubting myself, being confused and strained by my proclivities. It's caused difficulties in relationships. I've had related depression and have been through self loathing and gender issues that have strained my psyche for years. But...

...I wouldn't change it because who I am is who I am. And I'm glad to be who I am with all that such a statement entails.

There is an old saying, "Nothing that is truly worthy, has ever been easy to come by." Now obviously that's not true because of Bacon Sandwiches. BUT. It still works for me. Because I would never be the person I am, if it wasn't for everything that I've been through. I am different (because of my cross dressing) from the person I would have been without it, and that is a positive thing and I embrace it.

I've learnt so much, understood so much more and experienced so much that I would never want to change it. And I'm only at the foot of the mountain of discovery still. So No I don't want to go back, I'm all for strapping on the crampons and starting to climb higher. There is a tower of learning above and an intrigued pupil on the rope.