It is what I am.
It is what I am.
For me it's not a hobby, I actually hate it when my (ex)wife calls it that.
And although I regularly feel the compulsion to dress it isn't that either. And one could call it an addiction because I can't stop doing it, but it really isn't.
I dress because it is a part of me, it's in my nature, it's hard wired into my brain, it's a part of who or what I am.
The best way I currently know to explain it so that everyone understand, I used this sentence when trying to explain my feelings to my mom. Wearing girls clothes is kind of like having intercourse, I never missed it until I had it and now I can't live without it.
do not label me for i am unique
I'm in the choice camp as dressing for me is by and large a conscious decision rather than something I subject myself to. Not exactly a hobby either as it's not on the surface and hasn't been something I have been willing to forsake completely, only delay. It's a decision for me to put on a dress, wig and make-up. A privilege, even.
During my life I have probably considered myself all of the above, but the reality is that as I grew older I came to realize that those definitions were in my head, based on cultural definition of what society considers deviance from the norm. There is guilt associated with 'addiction' and 'compulsion', and 'hobby' reeks of a rationale for our unconventional behavior, intimating that it is just a mere distraction/aberration from 'correct' gender expression.
Now for me it is none of the above. I am left of center on the gender identity scale, expressing myself as male most of the time, since that is how I grew up, and is how most of my public world views me. Then at the same time I express myself (almost daily, in my home) as female. My SO is aware and accepts my feminine expression at home...
It's hard enough to be who I am without trying to squeeze myself into three categories, so I just don't.
Vala, I think you hit the nail on the head with one blow.Originally Posted by Vala
That is just the way I feel about dressing, it may have started off as a curiosity at first but I was hooked with those first feeling that I did't want to give up, even though I passed it over for nearly 30 yrs before coming out of the closet.
Martina
The girl my Mother longed for trapped inside a boys body If she had only known I was there.
Yes, Vala, you've said it for me as well.
Tammy, I've been there too and I'm sure others have as well. All I can say is that at some point I just accepted it and whatever fear or angst I had just went out the window. And I still keep my male self.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club
This one of the best, respectful responses so far.
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
not a pastime.
Very not.
A neurological predilection of the most feminine appreciation.
Silly goose.
I would also add "need" to the list
COMPULSION it controls my life wish it didn't but it does
Hi Sally, I don't know what you call it all I know is that I totally enjoy it. ~~...
...
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~...
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
Like MissDanielle above it is a necessity for me, for my overall well being. It is definitely not a hobby. And while I am innately driven to crossdress, my crossdressing does not meet the definition of compulsion or addiction, as I understand them.
Hobby - sounds to simple
Addiction - that would deny any self-control
Compulsion - at times there are urges, but I can go either way
.....
Expression - most definitely, another side can be fully exposed
Art-form - love the transformation, the presentation
Need - its another outlet to find balance in life
It is always a hobby, and something I try to improve on nowdays.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
For me my dressing is part of my lifestyle , it's part of my everyday routine .
none of those terms describe it for me....lifestyle choice fits me better...it is an everyday part of life....i also used to go with the artistic expression thingy....cause it can def be that too...but after a while...its just life.
It's pretty much a hobby with me and I got many different hobbies to be involved with, but sometimes I just wanna put one of my dresses on and feel like a princess!
Don't we all want to be a princess? I'm still looking for that perfect gown that speaks to me.
I'm a nice Jewish girl.
I'm not a girl, Not yet a woman.
A necessity, as it been said before.
If I need to choose. A compulsion.
It's all of the above and it's my true self.
I enjoy being a boy, being a GIRL like me!!!
I find that my crossdressing is often in response to my stress level. When I am more stressed, I find that the ability to crossdress brings comfort and a peace that I can't find through any other means. So, in that case, I'd say that it is more a compulsion. But I also enjoy just dressing up and feeling attractive. My wife describes it similarly to how women go through moments of just wanting to feel like a princess for a night. So, they doll themselves up. I think all men have that same need to feel attractive. Maintaining the chiseled body that media tells us to strive for is much harder to upkeep than giving yourself curves and a pretty face. I think I also just enjoy female fashion better. They have a lot more variety and color choice than men's clothing.
I am just now starting to be more open about this part of me. So, it hasn't become an addiction yet, but shopping is a lot more fun now that I am indulging a bit! So, I hope that I can spot the signs of it becoming that way if necessary. Thanks for asking this question. It's really interesting to see how different crossdressing is for all of us.
It's primarily a hobby, because its something I do for fun a couple of times a week. But there's a few times every couple of months where it feels like an obsession: those times when the pink fog takes hold, and you just spend spend spend on anything that suits your other persona.
I think for some people, especially if they're TG or transitioning, calling it a hobby is offensive because this is a huge part of who they are. And I understand that, but for a straight guy like me that has no interest in going the Caitlyn Jenner route, this is just a fun thing that I enjoy doing that releases me from the stresses and ills of my life.
It's part of my life, I couldn't live healthy without crossdressing, really not a hobby, it's necessary.
100% correct Suzy. I was born this way and had no choice in the matter.
Its also the icing on the cake of life.
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