Good evening!
So, I'm hanging on day to day here until my HRT appointment next month. Presenting female provides me with some temporary relief, but due to some employment/community restrictions, I'm forced to either hide out at Home or present male to do anything.
Additionally, work requires me to fill a pretty macho role, for days/weeks at a time with no privacy or relief.
So far, I've been going day to day... Some being better than others, but each time I'm faced with another stretch of presenting male I'm finding my GD/anxiety is escalating pretty fast. Body dysphoria is becoming much more acute... And thoughts about "other" solutions have become a bit more common.
My concern is that if this continues, and I can't hold things together, then I'm looking at one hell of a spectacular "loss pileup" which I may or may not survive.
Ok, back to the question- ALL my hopes and plans here are kind of revolving around HRT calming me down and allowing me to function until I can execute a controlled transition. Is that a good plan? Or is it possible not to get any or limited relief from hormone replacement?
If it's common to not get relief with HRT alone vice full transition, I Need to build a strategy to deal with that, but if I make preps to eject from the plane here it's going to strain my marriage to the breaking point.
*edit* to clarify, an accelerated transition timeline would require outing myself at work and in community, which would be a very public/(maybe even publicized?) and extremely disruptive process, and almost certainly would lead me to be reassigned/transferred someplace else. My SO just started a small business here and is integrating into the community... So obviously this would significantly impact her directly. Getting transferred would prompt immediate explanations from all family members and friends... Y'all get the picture. My plan for this would be... I don't know? Not good- maybe keeping a couple hundred bucks in the glove compartment or something? Like planning for thermonuclear attack by selecting a good sunscreen...
Thanks everyone in advance!!
Jane