Hello all!
I have been looking around in chat rooms and whatnot for the past few hours, I have found very few, non-passable, crossdressers to chat with and relate to. I know I will find a few here. Let me explain, I have been a member of this site for quite a while, never really thought of myself as a crossdresser, just thought I liked to wear girly clothes such as girl themed t-shirts, pajamas and things like that. Recently I have found a few articles online that describe how I feel about it better, I feel that I am so attracted to women, I want to wear what they wear. I want to be sexy like them because they are so sexy. I don't know why it took me so long to find someone that could articulate the feelings better than me but I did!
Anyways, for the longest time my wife has known and been partially supportive. She seems to have moods where she is more open and moods where she is less. For years she has been ok with me wearing girly stuff that is light hearted, like, character shirts, goofy graphic tees, pajamas, things like this. It wasn't until she got a job at retail that she bought me as a present some pajama pants with just hearts and stars on them and not some kind of character. I was so thrilled. After that she would get me some shirts like that as well, still not really blouses, just t-shirts but with sparkles and they said love and other girly stuff on them I loved it! After that started happening, I would wait until she was gone somewhere and send her a text asking if I could wear something of hers (because I'm still a big chicken and can't do it face to face). She said I could just not one of her nice ones cause she doesn't want them stretched out. She has this cold shoulder red top with gold stars on it and I suggested that along with some others. It is almost the most femme thing she has but she never wears it. She said I could wear that. I was on cloud nine! I felt so excited, like butterflies in my stomach.
Last night started the same, she said I could wear that one or another one that is pink and has some sparkles and says "Sarcasm, Just another thing I'm good at." I went for that sarcasm one this time as I have always liked it when she has worn it. She came home from work at about 11PM and picked me up to go get some food, we stopped by the local Walmart and I suggested that we both treat ourselves to something. So after spending some time in the mens section we make our way to the womens. I guess I should mention we haven't gone shopping together for womens clothes in years, I was very nervous. I found a shirt I'm sure she would love for herself and offered to get it for her. It has a lace back and a cool design on the front, again, very feminine. On that same rack I saw another that was white instead of blue like hers and had a different print on the front, a floral patern. I suggested, what if I get this and we both share it. She mentioned that she wanted me to get something from the mens section but agreed. I was so very excited, this is the first time she is letting me get my own floral top! By far the girliest thing in my closet now.
After that happened last night, I was so excited I couldn't sleep. I have been euphoric ever since. It has got me thinking, I really am a crossdresser. Before I was in a sort of half denial. I knew I could be, but I thought I just liked the clothes, and yes that is still true, but now I want to do more. I guess I have been building slowly to this, the last pack of underwear I bought were some disney frozen ones. Those were my first panties. She saw me wearing them and asked, "What's next, bras?" at the time I wanted to tell her, yes, but I understand that might be too much for her. I have no interest in going out in public as a female, I'm not passable at all, but I might want to wear my shirts out sometimes. I know I do want to wear bras, camis, and skirts. She knows I have worn some of her camis before but I want my own. I guess I'm just ready to move to the next step.
Is there any other non-passable or any others that have some experience with this? How should I ease that on to her? I don't want to trick her, but I do want to take it in the least threatening way possible. I think I have calmed her fears of me wanting to be a woman with some articles I found online, and since then she has been more open but still will say, "Can you ever wear guy stuff?" and I will but I feel so comfortable in womans clothes. So liberating, and exciting. Can anyone relate?
(Sorry for the long post, I wanted to find other non-passable cds at first but then my brain wouldn't turn off)