Anyone seeing a therapist ever have them ask you to come in dressed?
Anyone seeing a therapist ever have them ask you to come in dressed?
Hi Stephanie,
I'm sure you'll have many affirmative's here. Being one myself, I'd see a lot of sense in meeting "both sides" of the CD/TG/TS, and dressing is a primary way a persom can express an aspect. Another powerful way to get an aspect to speak is to use a hand puppet for it. Anyway, i'd call this good practice to ask to see both presentations.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.
thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er
Hi Stephanie,
Yes, it is not an uncommon request.
I broached the subject to my therapist and she was ecstatic over the idea. I did go as Linda that time and I'm planning on doing it again later this month.
I also had a close friend who was asked to come enfemme to the next appointment by her therapist. From then on she was in female mode much more than boy mode.
I haven't had one ask me first but that might be because I asked first if it was OK. All of the ones that knew how to work with gender spectrum were more than fine with it. The only reason I now don't go dressed is due to logistics on my end (appointment times are not perfect). I have gone dressed to sessions with 5 different therapists (a large practice some left to raise children, others moved to a different location...) and all of them felt it helped them to see my demeanor while dressed. ALL NOTICED A LOWER LEVEL OF STRESS, more eye contact and a deeper sharing of FEELINGS, interesting?
I think this request is only going to come from a therapist skilled in gender. I also think that when you go dressed if you feel very comfortable with them that is an excellent sign. Good luck, now what do you wear??
It is probably a useful way for them to see how your comfort level may vary. Perhaps dressed, it would be easier to talk about sensitive subjects. And even if it ends up being the opposite, it shows a therapist the level of self acceptance. Dressing isn't "wrong", but I am pretty certain there are cders who are doing it for tge wrong reasons and are not getting the proper feelings, even though desire is still present. Expectations may need to be worked through.
Stephanie,
I have attended two different counselling sessions neither asked me to attend dressed but they had no objections if I did, if it was to help me.
Both counsellors knew what I looked like because I showed them photos, at the last session of my gender counselling I did slip on a pair of heels mainly for the fun of it and sat through the session, she knew I was wearing matching cami, panties and suspender belt with stockings under my drab clothes because I told her, she was intrigued to know if I was comfortable !
Yes,only it was my primary care Dr. She already knew about me years ago and wanted to see me dressed to the hilt. If I didn't mind,which I didn't. I guess curiosity got the better of her.everything went fine.
I haven't spoken with a gender therapist, but I did speak with a counselor. She said I was welcome to come in dressed and asked me if I'd like to, which I accepted. In many of our subsequent meetings, I came in and did my nails while we talked, in various states of dress depending on the flavor of the day.
My therapist saw Heidi only after my diagnosis that I was transgendered. She didn't ask me to show up that way and I didn't want it interfering with an outcome. When I did show up dressed, my situation was similar to Sarah's: she found me to be more open, more at ease and comfortable with myself.
Be yourself. Everyone else is taken!
Stephanie,
be sure you read through your therapist's website and qualifications very carefully. He must have lots of experience and expertise in transgender patients.
The first one I saw wanted to talk me out of cding.
Have any ever gone to a MALE therapist dressed up as a woman? For me, that would be much more challenging. I have a female therapist, and have shown her pictures of me as Alice. No biggie. Not sure i would do it with a male therapist.
what if the male therapist were also CD/TG?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.
thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er
Pamela, That would make it a little less challenging, for sure.
She hasn't ask me to come in a dress or skirt.
But I most generally wear ladies pants and a blouse anyway.
Usually wear large sunglasses while in the waiting room.
Wouldn't want to scare away the clients.
Mine is a little different.
Had to see a Psychiatrist multiple times for letters for surgeons. By that point only dressed as male for work, but he wanted to meet multiple times as both male and female. Felt very awkward dressed as male.
I did it about the 5th visit and it was great!
No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.
I dressed for 4 of my therapists (all women), but I asked if it was OK first. The man didn't quite say no, but he discouraged me; so I didn't.
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
When I was in therapy it was primarily about my cross dressing desires and how far I wanted to go along the journey. A major portion of her practice involved gender issues so I was comfortable when I went to see her enfemme and the waiting room was a mix of folks with similar attitudes. If you are exploring how far you want to go and if your therapist isn't comfortable with you presenting that way you may need to find another therapist. My two cents.
Jennifer put it well about being sure you are working with someone who in trained in gender issues, but if she asked you to dress she likely has some experience. The first 6 or so did nothing for me but cash my payment checks on time!
Alice, I have only been to female therapists with one exception (a highly trained male) and I just didn't feel comfortable sharing with him. That taught me how important it is to only work with ones you feel very comfortable revealing yourself to. With my current one nothing is off the table or overly difficult beyond just the subject matter. Obviously deeper feeling are harder but still discuss-able.
OP please let us know how it goes.
About 30 years ago, when I didn't realize that it was the people around me that needed therapy, I was seeing a sly-kya-trickster that announced right off the bat that he did not want to see me dressed. He was trying to convince me that my gender expression was unnecessary baggage to carry through life. And, that I needed to be on psychotropic pharmaceuticals for the rest of my pathetic life.
Fast forward to now. My wife sees a professional and occasionally, I'm asked to attend. She is truley a gender therapist and was even married to a CD. I've seen some very nice and, well, not so nice transformed ladies in the waiting room. I'm rarely asked to attend but, if she would like to meet Carla, I would oblige. Of course, that would be after a makeover from Amy.
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
I have not yet been to my therapist while dressed. She has mentioned that she would like to meet Rebecca in the future, but will not push me to do that. In her words, "it will happen when it happens". I really want to introduce her to Rebecca, but logistics on my end are hard to account for, as I usually leave from work to attend my sessions.
My therapist wanted me to emphasize my male side but that hasn't exactly worked, and last time I saw her suggested I needed to find a way to be balanced through discreet dressing and fantasy. I did ask her if she had other CD clients and she does. I asked if some of them come in dressed, and they do. So I may try to put together the courage to do so some time in the near future.
It seems as if going to a female therapist dressed up is far easier for those who are responding. Why should that be? Think about it. I suspect exploring the reasons in a really honest way could reveal some interesting psychological insights as regards what crossdressing means - at least for those who have feelings around this issue. Just saying.
My first time at my therapist I dressed completely male. Dress slacks, polo, dress shoes. She asked me if I was comfortable that way. I told her no and she said it was obvious that I wasn't. She told me to dress as comfortable as I wanted to. After that I wore yoga pants or leggings and a girl T-shirt and bra. She told me the only thing holding me back from appearing in public was myself. That was over a year ago and to this day, I dress however I want to in public except for when I'm with my wife as she prefers I don't.
She kept me from being afraid of being myself.
I started with a gender therapist a few years ago mid summer, I came in dressed on Halloween since I figured it was a safe day - her comment was that she was fairly happy for me. Oddly enough the next year my appointment was also on Halloween, I added cat ears to normal street wear