But still, all of this has got me thinking, it sure would be easier if I just let all this foolishness go. If I just pretended to be the man that society expects me to be. Started wearing regular men's clothes, cutting my hair, attending church, driving a Buick, etc. I wouldn't have to worry so much job loss, teasing, dirty looks, snaring, family interventions, and nasty divorces.
You are really in a tight spot. Doing what you noted above obviously won't work out in the long run. You seem to realize that already. You would still have to live with being a CD. There is no escaping that. You already noted how much of your thinking it occupies and by keeping your clothes know deep down inside you'll never give up.
Still, you might be worrying a bit too much. As for passing, as so many have noted, most people simply don't notice or even care. Keep on that happy face will go along way to your being accepted, which is all that matters. Certainly you have to be careful about not being discovered by people you work with. A lot depends on how many know you and can recognize you. The odds of being discovered are slight if you live in a busy area and go where the crowds are.
Freedom really means mainly political freedom. As for anything else, there is little fredom. There is a saying in Japan which runs, "A nail that sticks out soon gets hit." Try not to stick out as much as you can.
Look carefully at your situation and create a niche that works for you. I think a lot of CDs lead double lives as you noted. It's the way things go.
You could also read the posting on "You can."
