Poor Me

[evadan]

Poor me. I just have to vent because the only other person I can vent to besides my Forum friends is my wife.

Here's the set-up: My wife and high school age son are heading out next week on a four day school trip. This is an annual event, so we have known about it since last year. It is the one time these days that I have the house to myself for more than a few hours. To say that I am looking forward to that time is an understatement. My wife is supporting and knows Eva would make good use of her time.

Here's the upshot: I got a call yesterday from a friend. His wife's mother has been in the hospital for a month in another town. They are moving her to a rehab facility in our area. He and his wife will be coming down for the next month or so from Thursday evening until Sunday to be with the Mother starting NEXT WEEK. They are dear friends and we have told them (maybe foolishly) that our home is always open to them. So one or both will be staying in our guest room when they are in town. I can't possibly tell them they can't - especially because of the tough circumstances with the Mother. My four day pink fog is going up in smoke. Timing is everything! Part of me wants to cry and the other part just has to laugh. It seems like something always comes up to interfere with my Eva time.

Okay. I'm done venting. Maybe they won't show up until Friday so I get one evening to myself...

Brooding,

Eva D.

[JustWendy]

Eva, you have your priorities straight. Sometimes you just have to laugh when fate plays a joke on you. Enjoy what time you can spend with your friend and his wife and feel good about helping them during a difficult time. I hope you won't have to wait too long for other opportunities.

Wendy

[Tracii G]

This might sound hoaky to some but I truly believe it.
When you give of yourself in others time of need the reward far outweighs the slight inconvenience at the time because you did the right thing by having your heart in the right place.
The reward will come in times when you need it trust me on that.
I have experienced this several times and I am glad I took the time to help a friend in need.

[~Joanne~]

Know why your pink fog is going up in smoke? because you planned it! i swear every time I have planned on a dressing session or going out dressed, it got messed up by this, that, or the other. don't plan them.....just do it when the need hits and you have the time. planning ahead is always doomed.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Eva , That's what REAL friends do for each other, I whole heartedly agree with Tracii.

We have a special couple that also knows that our home is always open to them.

[Robin414]

Way to go Eva, a friend in need is a friend in...sorry, that sounds a little too cliché

I feel your pain but I agree with Tracii, what comes around goes around (damn, another cliché ) anyway, it's all about Karma ☺

[Pat]

So sorry. That totally stinks and there's no denying that. But there's also no denying that you're doing the right thing. You get points on a board somewhere.

[Diversity]

I so totally understand your frustration and disappointment in the timing of it all. I have experienced such things as well.
Anyways, you have made the right decision and I hope all improves for your friends and their mother. This is the most important thing.
I hope you get rewarded with an even longer opportunity to be Eva next time. Perhaps your wife will help you find the time, since she sounds so understanding.
Di

[Krisi]

You can't turn your friend away, that would be wrong. There will be other time and perhaps you can make them. Send your son to camp or on a trip, go away for a few days yourself (rent a motel room), etc. As long as your wife knows the situation, you should be able to make it happen.

[larry]

The GOOD person in you will get rewarded somehow someway ..

[Nikkilovesdresses]

I think you should do the whole Cage Aux Folles/Mrs Doubtfire thing- just totally go for it. "Hi, I'm Eva! - Dan (?) asked me to welcome you as he's had to go out of town on an urgent business meeting, but he told me to make you guys welcome and I'm going to cook you vegan pasta for dinner and I've already opened a darling little chardonnay OH MY GOD I just love your earrings" that sort of thing. Who cares if they recognise you, just say you're having a midwife crisis...

Good luck!

[ReineD]

Gosh, that's terrible. I don't blame you if you feel frustrated.

You say your wife is understanding. Would it be OK, if the friends do show up the entire time your family is gone, for you to have a weekend away by yourself in the foreseeable future? Your wife must understand that this is one of the only times you get to dress?

[Kate Simmons]

Just because you are the willing host, doesn't mean you have to be constantly entertaining company. Just a thought.

[Alice Torn]

Building character never comes easy.

[LelaK]

Can't you dress in your room or somewhere?

[evadan]

I think you should do the whole Cage Aux Folles/Mrs Doubtfire thing- just totally go for it. "Hi, I'm Eva! - Dan (?) asked me to welcome you as he's had to go out of town on an urgent business meeting, but he told me to make you guys welcome and I'm going to cook you vegan pasta for dinner and I've already opened a darling little chardonnay OH MY GOD I just love your earrings" that sort of thing. Who cares if they recognise you, just say you're having a midwife crisis...

Good luck!

It s funny because I think I could introduce Eva to him but not to her. He's a photographer ant I have thought (not seriously) of asking him to do a special photo shoot for me.

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Yes, Reine, my wife understands and would help me to find another weekend. But I was looking forward to being at home. I'm so tired of hotel rooms. I just wanted to relax with all the comforts of home. I shouldn't be complaining. I know many are in far more limiting situations than me.

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Can't you dress in your room or somewhere?

Maybe when I turn in for the night. I won't be able to work on my make-up though.

[Claire Cook]

Bummer indeed, but Wendy and Tracii have said it for me. This is a time for friends to help one another, and (tough as this is...) down the road you'll have your chance to be you. I'm sure many of us have had to put some scheduled girl time on hold because something came up -- I know I have.

[JaytoJillian]

You are entitled to feel frustrated. I know that I would. Think of the things you have going for you--an awesome spouse who understands and supports, friends who know they can count on you and a ginormous deposit in the bank of karma!

You are a sweetie for doing the right thing!

Cheers,

Jill