Crossdresser transitioned to transexual?

[LeaP]

The "it" being what, Rogina?

[Rogina B]

The "it" being what, Rogina?

Their life as they want.

[LeaP]

I think it better to distinguish need from want and specify both. In fact, the combination is often reversed for transitioners vs CDs. The CD often expresses a want without the need. The transitioner has the need but often resists to the max.

[Marcelle]

When I first wandered to this forum three years ago, I was confused, broken and very concerned for my own mental health. I had no idea what the difference was between a cross dresser and a transwoman. I latched onto to being a CDer early because it seemed to fit as I felt I liked to dress up and that was it. However as things progressed at a very rapid pace and I engaged in therapy with a gender identity specialist I soon discovered it was not the clothes but about being me. I could dress up and feel good but it didn't take long to realize that wasn't it. I could be happy for a brief period of time but when I went back to being guy it was like I was playing a role in effect . . . cross dressing as a man.

So as to bottle the genie quickly and not bore all with details of three years of self discovery . . . I realized quickly in meeting with local TG folk that I had nothing in common with those who cross dress as it wasn't about make-up, shoes and whatnot (no offence meant to any CD folk) it just wasn't me. However the trans women who were in the group I could identify with, the same angst, the same desire to be who I was meant to be . . . a woman . . . it all spoke to me crystal clear. Yeah I tried gender fluid but that lasted a few months at most because I realized there was no guy, never was . . . just a societal cloak I threw over myself to prove to everyone that I must be a dude. I threw the cloak out long ago and now I just exist as a woman . . . happy for the first time in 52 years. How do I know I am happy? Because when I see my smile reflected in a mirror or window . . . it is real and genuine. If I look at any of my pictures as a guy . . . the smile is fake and forced.

So CDing was not a stepping stone or some gateway condition to Translandia . . . I was always there . . . just had the wrong passport.

Cheers

Marcelle

[Starling]

I thought I was a cross dresser when I joined this website, but in a few months found my true community in this part of the forest. Time will tell if I wasn't better off not knowing who I really was. At least now I have flesh and blood friends who love me for who I really am and are there to help me if my life blows up. I credit this place--and you good people--for giving me the knowledge and courage to reach out for real, and for lifting the curse of shame that has plagued me for so many years.

Now I'm working on the guilt...

Lallie

[PaulaQ]

Many of us start out as CDs, many do not. Some of us are aware of this and can name it from an early age, some cannot. There is no one answer here. I know a very large number of trans people now, and I can tell you that while you will find commonality in many stories, they are all different from one another.

As for your own transition, here's a couple of questions to ponder:
1. Are you, at the core of your being, a man or a woman?
2. If the answer to #1 differs from your sex assigned at birth, how miserable are you?
3. Would living as your desired gender ease the suffering stated in #2?

If you answered, "woman", "really miserable", and "yes", you should probably be talking with a gender therapist.

[Nigella]

I guess the OP doesn't really need this thread, despite viewing it, they have not bothered to acknowledge any replies, thread done.