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Thread: Crossdresser VS Transitioning

  1. #26
    Woman first, Trans second
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    Alexa, I actually wrote that last night and apparently my mobile browser didn't submit until this morning when I reopened, which caused me to miss your post (and a few others). I've clarified my original post a bit, but...

    Define what identifying as "transgender" and "transitioning in your own little way" mean to you.
    Last edited by Zooey; 05-29-2016 at 02:08 PM.
    Coming out is like discovering that you've been drowning your whole life after actually breathing air for the first time.

  2. #27
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Oh wow. And I thought the semantics fight of CD vsTG was inflammatory.
    This thread is going to get bloody....quickly so walk carefully

    OP. You don't have a clue what TS is. But you are new so we'll let it slide. Might be a REALLY good idea though to do some background research on being a TS and why people are TS. And you really need to get over the If you are a man you have to date a woman or if you are a woman you have to date a man. You date/ marry who you love, not the gender.

    Which brings me to TSKimberly. Whose name implies she is TS. I hope it was a typo when you said it WAS a choice and we CHOOSE to transition (here we encompass all phases and transitioning isn't the GRS...it is being TS even if you don't do surgery or hormones). You scare me. You say you are TS and then say stuff like that? Maybe the TS stands for a physical location like "The South"


    Things like this are why I suggest using the search feature here so you don't jump into the shark take with an open wound then wonder why they are circling you.
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  3. #28

  4. #29
    Aspiring Member
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    Well I thoroughly enjoy dressing as a woman. When I do I become Martha and I have become very feminine and am trying to perfect my walk.

    I enjoy at that time being a woman.

    However, I would not transition. I still like my male self as well.

    If I wanted to become a woman full time I would have noting but women's clothing and accessories and dress and act as a woman full time.

  5. #30
    Member Alexa CD's Avatar
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    Oh ok, you know I'm just curious, I like to ask questions and hear, or read peoples thoughts on things.

    I'm going to try to be brief. Transgender is essentially not identifying with my assigned or physical gender, so for me I am mentally (and spiritually I guess) the opposite sex, female. This isn't something that I have decided, it's not a choice and for as long as I can remember I have always felt this way. For me, while I have always in some way known, it had taken me years until I truly figured out what was going on. I have at times been in denial and experienced confliction. I experience BDD and dysphoria related to this daily. That is more or less (less) my personal definition of what transgender has been for me so far. (I think I slightly misread your question, I in a way incorrectly don't fully identify as transgender, but slightly less, not as in undecided but as in uncommitted)

    Transitioning in my own little way. My mind is my worst enemy, I am always second guessing myself or not taking myself seriously when it comes to being transgender even though I have strong feelings about it. So rather than take action, see a gender therapist and begin what is generally referred to as an MtF transition I have continuously put it off by essentially trying to ignore myself, which has had drawn out negative consequences. So what I have been trying to do is express myself and relieve some of my feelings by giving in to my inner self to a degree. It's not HRT, and so it's not much but it's what I'm capable of right now.

    I see alot of transgender people say that transitioning is an easy decision and if you can't just make that move then you're not transgender. That to me is not true.
    Last edited by Alexa CD; 05-29-2016 at 03:07 PM. Reason: In brackets.

  6. #31
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    So there are so many things I could say about this thread. Really there are. But I thought I'd start here, with this rather dour and oft repeated sentiment:

    Quote Originally Posted by sometimes_miss View Post
    There are a number of MTF's that would transition, but know that there are basically ZERO GG's who could ever accept a MTF TS as a mate; you're basically sentencing yourself to a lifetime with no intimate partner, unless you're into men. Lesbians want real GG's, other GG's want real men. The only market for MTF TS is males, and those basically just want sex, not any kind of relationship. The number of women who will accept a MTF crossdresser is virtually nil; the number who will accept a TS is even far less than that.
    Against my better judgment, I have become one of the lead organizers for a large, long running CD / TS meetup group in Dallas. It has several hundred members, and has sort of filled in where Tri-Ess and the metroplex cross dressers club used to be - neither of them are really around anymore. I intend to do what I can to make it a better group, events have been a little sparse in the group lately.

    So we got the following request from someone who wanted to be an organizer in the group. I'll just let you read excerpts from it, and you can judge for yourself the truth of the statement I quoted above from the thread. I also want to point out that I know several trans men and trans women who have cisgender women partners. See for yourself:

    I'm a genetic girl who loves CD's and TG's. I just joined the Meetup group, but I have been organizing CD/TG activities through *******. I would be happy to organize more fun girly things to do.

    There are many female dominants who enjoy crossdressers and trans girls. It's their kink...as it is one of my biggest kinks. I have found many lovely and amazing people through ******* and I found the CD/TG groups and started getting involved. It has been some crazy, intense fun, so far.

    I've been giving makeovers and taking gurls out en femme for their very first time. We go shopping, go to Station 4..

    ...but to be honest, this is way more than a fetish to me, now. It's a community of amazing, creative and open minded individuals who I'm thrilled to have as friends!
    You be the judge.

  7. #32
    Woman first, Trans second
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alexa CD View Post
    I see alot of transgender people say that transitioning is an easy decision and if you can't just make that move then you're not transgender. That to me is not true.
    That is an unfortunate misinterpretation of what most of us say. I've never known anybody, including myself, to say that transition is an easy choice. We simply say it's not really a choice. The so-called choice is often between transition, a lifetime of unbearable misery, or death. Transition is not an easy thing - far from it - but when those are the alternatives, there really isn't much of a choice at all.

    Okay, so, I would not say that you're transitioning at all. You're in a state of trying to avoid the possibility/realities of transition. I get that. No matter what the conclusion, please see the therapist. Keeping all of this bottled up is never healthy.

    As to your identity, I will only say that I worry a bit about people who identify as transgender. Transgender is an adjective, and it applies to me, but it is not my identity. I am a woman, who happens to be transgender. I would always encourage anybody to think primarily about who and what they actually are, not the adjectives for the way in which they are it.

    People get focused on HRT and physical changes. They're visible, and for a lot of people (myself included) they're a really big deal and carry a lot of weight. That said, if you ask most people who have transitioned, the mental/emotional/etc. adjustments and changes are by far the most significant, and the most challenging. Some of them are tied to HRT, some of them are not. The most important transition is the one from living a life of shame, hiding, and lies to living a life full of openness, honesty, and genuine happiness.
    Last edited by Zooey; 05-29-2016 at 03:54 PM.
    Coming out is like discovering that you've been drowning your whole life after actually breathing air for the first time.

  8. #33
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    The original post was about cding and relationships vs TS and relationships, some have taken this to be cd vs TS and taking it off topic. Thread done.
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