Hi all.
I did try to post this before but managed to drop it into the introductions, totally not what I wanted to do but still did, apologies to nigella for this, it won't happen again 😳
Anyway, I seem to have painted myself into a corner in that I've not long told my SO that I cross dress or at least that I used to. Before we got together I was regularly dressing but as I always have done in the past I shut it down when we got together, kind of a security thing till I was sure it'd go somewhere.
I had always done this with dressing and relationships never overlapping the two apart from one time when I found it to be too weird and embarrassing.
A therapist once told me that to have this either or approach was a bad idea and that I should gradually phase it in till the penny dropped and this method did work, I started by buying her a pair of boots for bedroom use which bless her she happily wore. At that time though she did say 'if you wanted to wear them then there'd be a problem' - hmmm.
So now I really want to dress again, it's been said quite rightly that it never goes away and I guess like so many I thought I could bury it but as many will know it ain't that simple! When I told her she kind of parked it seemingly hoping it would be swept under the carpet and life would carry on, I did explain that I wanted to keep it totally out of sight of us only indulging when she was out of town and well and truly out of the bedroom as she really wouldn't have that. Seems she feels threatened by it sexually, or just weirded out I guess, ironically when I dress It's only ever boosted my sex drive with my previous SO's!
So I guess what I'm asking is what do I say now? I really want to keep this years old relationship going as she's a great girl and perfect in every sense, she's just a bit roast beef and Yorkshire pudding when it comes to these things, indeed before I told her she came home from work saying she'd had a conversation with the girls at work about what they'd all do if their men came out as crossdressers, so frustrating that all of the others said they'd be supportive when my girl simply said 'im with a man full stop' great.
Any thoughts?