I can dress to the nines. I can pluck my eyebrows and shave my skin. I can shave my legs. I can shave my face. All of which I do. I wear women's clothing. Some of which I won't (yet) in public (skirts for example)
But no matter what I do. I have a very masculine face. That would be a give away no matter if I tried to pass or not.
So for those in this situation. What do you do?
There's a lot of good videos on YouTube that show how to feminize your face i.e. highlighting and contouring. You can also select hairstyles that will help your face appear more feminine.
You could wear a mask as others have done, but I could not go out like that myself.
Rader
The right pair of glasses can also really change the appearance of your face, larger frames can really help with a round or square facial structure and help minimize the prominence of a strong male jaw and chin. The bonus is that in male mode many unisex frames don't look out of place at all.
Most decent eyeglass retailers will have facial structure guide (like this one http://www.lenscrafters.com/findyourlook) that you can use to determine the best look for your face.
The bonus is, that if you don't require glasses to see, then the lenses will be cheap/free and you will be able to choose from women's frames as well, since you won't be required to wear them in guy mode.
I've also found that the sales associates at eyeglass retailers are super awesome and helpful. If you tell them the look you are going for they are more than willing to help you out.
Hope that helps,
Dani
Last edited by DaniT; 08-25-2016 at 01:43 AM. Reason: spelling and grammar
Many of us are in the same boat, I too have a masculine face with a typical male jaw line, the glasses are a good idea if it's your eyes that let you down, I'm the opposite and I feel the lower section lets me down
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I feel that wearing a mask is more obvious than working with what you have
I'd agree with all the advice suggested so far and the extend Leanne's point about face shape and working with what you've got - why not consider different wigs, in both length and style which complement your facial structure and colouring? If you have the time (both to practice and when dressing) artfully applied makeup can significantly alter how others perceive your face (It is true - and I'm still practicing!).
Thinking about what clothing I wear outside - I love wearing skirts out, really; it's exhilarating (and frightening) so ...
Best of luck
Tania
PS - in terms of celebrating our differences from much of the rest of the world, I went and put on a much loved skirt as I finished typing.
...so I didn't alter the spelling of "colour" too, as you can see I'm British and so I prefer to use the 'U' - hope the spelling checker police are off duty.
One thing you can do that will help a lot but takes time is to start up a good skin care regimen. It requires paying more attention to your face than most men do, but it's not "outing" or suspicious in any way -- you just look better. You might also want to start scanning photos and noticing women who have the same face shape as you and see what they do. We like to pretend that women's faces and men's faces are totally distinct, but really there's a lot of overlap and the women have solved most of the problems already.
Re: contouring -- it may just be because I spent years in the visual arts, but though I find contouring awesome for photographs and other 2D representations, I don't like it in real life where lighting is uncontrolled and people are perceiving you in 3 dimensions.
I am not a woman; I don't want to be a woman; I don't want to be mistaken for a woman.
I am not a man; I don't want to be a man; I don't want to be mistaken for a man.
I am a transgender person. And I'm still figuring out what that means.
Many thanks for your ideas. I appreciate it!
I go out anyway.
Men have "male" features. You can not hide genetics. You can minimize to some degree, but don't kid yourself, virtually no cross dresser can pass as a genetic woman. So, make yourself as presentable as you can and have fun in the real world with the normals.
OYou can apply medical tape to your face to simulate FFS
There are a ton of videos out there.
You could have a few facial prosthetics made.
Tape up your cheekbones are use a prosthetic cheekbone.
Tape up your chin,neck,eyelift,forehead lift....
To make a face feminine there are 8+ areas you need to change.
Less Space between top lip and bottom of nose
More Space under eyebrows
Higher eyebrows
Rounder smoother hairline with no widows peak
Bigger fuller lips
Less square jaw
Conical shaped smooth chin and less angular
Inner eyes slightly slanted down
Less brow ridging
Fatter plumper less angular cheekbones
plan your facial feminisation surgery/makeover. What to Do: 1. I assess your face and explain ...
http://www.virtualffs.co.uk/In_a_Nutshell.html
You are not hopeless!
Last edited by reinasblack; 08-26-2016 at 02:39 AM.
Susan,
One of the main aspects that makes a difference is the correct choice of wig in the right colour, a good one can transform the shape of a face. Next is good application of makeup, not heavily done but correctly. Choice of clothes to match your personality is the next thing to consider, don't worry what others do, see what works for you, if you start to feel good it will show because you will feel more confident, and possibly smile, it's something CDers struggle with. Many shy away and bury their head, you have to keep your head up and think I feel good , and smile, don't worry so much about voice or movement just feel good in how you look .
I've learned a lot since starting to meet other members of the TG community .
I'm an in-home cross dresser, who on occasion will venture out for evening strolls. The best time for me is when it is raining. I use an umbrella to obscure my face, and, to some extent hide my six foot height.
Hell-o Susan,
I'm going along with most of the others here.
If you want your face shape to appear differently
(assuming FFS isn't an option), some contouring,
along with a wig styled to frame your face is really
the way to go.
But then again, Jen said it, just go and have fun!
Much Love,
Kristyn
I smile because you are my friend, and
I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it!!!
I stopped looking in the mirrors.Originally Posted by susancheerleader
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
You need to know the tricks of the trade.
I see it all the time.
The hard things are hand,shoulders and feet size then mannerisms and deportment.
Never say never dear...in my opinion i would like to advise you to go at least for once to a professional make up artist...in my case she has been extremely helpful and she opened my eyes and reinforced quite a lot my feminine self esteem...
hopefully becoming the real "ME" now
Thanks everyone for your ides. I appreciate them.I don't have the extra cash but perhaps I will seek out someone that can do a "transformation make up and show me trucks and how to even use makeup! (I have no idea how.)
Two things that have already been mentioned - The right wig and glasses. I think a wig with bangs does wonders to hide male features. You want one that comes down and covers your ears and in front of the ears as well. Feminine eyeglasses send a signal to people that they are seeing a female, especially with the other things we add like boobs and a feminine butt.
And don't be too critical. Remember that you know you are a male when you look in the mirror or a photo. Strangers don't.
And the real trick - Smile. Notice how women are often smiling when in public (unless they are mad at someone of course). As men, many of us have been conditioned to walk around with a stern look on our faces. Most women have not.
Krisi, thats a very good tip about the smile...i noticed as well...and thanks for sharing it with us , much appreciated
Gilda
hopefully becoming the real "ME" now
It also depends on what your issue is. Is it your facial structure? It is your beard? If it is your facial structure (bone) you can learn to contour and highlight with makeup to help minimize it at least. A good hairstyle also really helps (there are charts out there that show ideal hairstyles for different face types.) If you have a beard shadow and/or bumpy, uneven skin on your beard area there is always electrolysis (even a small reduction of the amount of hair on your face, or great/complete removal on problem areas can make a big difference.)
The glasses idea is a great one, and one I use myself. I have a collection of vintage womens glasses and it does help feminize my face and draw attention up and away from my problem areas.
I have a terribly old man face. Here's what I do, Susan. I think I look great in pics and my mirror.
But, I don't recommend it for going out. Except around Halloween!
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U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Sherry, I wish you'd finally believe me in that you are as cute as heck in girl mode without the mask. But I respect why you wear it and think you are amazing either way.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
The key is using make up correctly.
Hey Susan,
I dream of a lot of things that I would do if I were really a woman but I am not. I like doing the cheerleader thing and I take advantage of stuff like costume runs, zombie runs, mud runs, etc... and volunteer or just show up and cheer on participants. I don't try to fool anyone but just man up and do it to what I feel is a proper degree. Most everyone gets a kick out of it and lots of people stop and ask me to pose with them for pics. I've even gained some new Facebook friends because of it.
As someone posted earlier, most of us don't really pass - not even those who are really good. I've seen some pretty convincing t-girls in public but spotted them out immediately. I guess the question is finding your purpose for crossdressing and make the best of it. I've found mine and have fun doing it.
Hope this helps!
Marcelo
PS This is NOT how you want to do it.
