Last July 12 was three years on HRT, and approx. the same amount of time full-time. It has been an interesting year, not so much from changes from hormones, or legal stuff, I'm past all that. Just life stuff.
I can't even count how many friends I've made. Almost all women. They all know I'm trans, and that is as far as it has gone. They're over the questions, and to them I'm just Paula, one of the group. I still cherish my trans friends, and that we never outgrow.
Had an 8 month relationship with a gender fluid man. A real sweetheart, who is still a dear friend. His fluidity made him just decide to stay out of relationships. Too complicated.
I'm going out with a transwoman now, who thinks I may be a lesbian, LOL, but that too is complicated. We have never called each other 'girlfriend' yet, but there's a blanket in the back of my car just for Sam, her dog, so I think that's a sign.
I passed a milestone and began wearing a bathing suit in public. I've been to the beach numerous times this summer. So far no harpoons. In fact, I don't think a single person has seen me as anything but a slightly oversize woman in a tankini. Good for the ego.
I joined a photography club, and we're a mixed group who go out on our photo safaris. I am their webmistress, and our leader is moving, so I was named Dictator for Life. Nobody has ever mentioned gender, but a few have joined my facebook page, and seen the Pride banner, and trans flag. Still nothing.
Tried my hand a camping. 18 gender variant folks in the same campground. With my distaste for- in order- sleeping on the ground, ashes in my coffee, hot dogs, mosquitos- I had to improvise. We brought a queen size mattress with frame, a coffee machine, and truly spectacular food. I forgot my blowdryer, but I'm new at this.
My guitar collection has spilled over into the guest room, to make room for camera stuff. I'm a serial collector.
By now you are dizzy, and wondering where this all is going. Bottom line- Somewhere in the depths of my mind, I will always be trans. Now, after three years, I really don't think anybody else sees me as trans. I've lost that feeling that was with me the first couple of years, that everybody was looking at me, and mumbling 'Look at the tranny'. Perhaps I have passed that biggest milestone of all- I have attained invisibility. Cool.
