A first for me

[Amanda Katharine]

Recently, my GF has taken to calling me by my femme name(in the process of being changed to Amanda) when I'm dressed and when we're intimate if I'm wearing lingerie and hose, she'll actually say that name instead of my real name while in the act. She did ask me beforehand when this started if I was ok with it and when this occurs, she largely talks to me like a woman.

I was initially thrilled at the idea of being addressed as Amanda but honestly after hearing it, the main thing that crossed my mind was wondering who she was talking about because it kinda felt odd hearing someone else's name even though I know she's referring to me. Is there something wrong with me or is this normal? Should I just be happy she's doing it?

[reb.femme]

I wouldn't be happy with it. Ecstatic would be a better description.

Happy things are this good for you.

Becky

[Lori Kurtz]

If you don't want to be happy with it, maybe you should trade places with one of the rest of us. There are plenty who would be thrilled to have what you have. Seriously. Enjoy what you're blessed with, Amanda.

[NicoleScott]

To answer your question directly, yes. there's something wrong with you. Insecurity. Intimate while dressed with your GF. Holy cow, just enjoy it. You didn't say this, but are you wondering if she is having fantasies of being with a woman, even one named Amanda? Insecurity.
You want to be called Amanda, but not during intimacy when you are dressed as Amanda, when you prefer to be called by your real guy name. How can this NOT be confusing for her, not to mention confusing for you?

[Elizabeth G]

I would love to be in that position. One of the things I enjoy on this forum is when I am referred to by my femme name.

Elizabeth

[Teresa]

MissElizabeth/Amanda,

It's easier if your femme name is based on your male name, as in my case, if my wife wished to call me by it then it wouldn't sound too out of the ordinary, the fact is she doesn't but I won't repeat the names she does call me sometimes !

[Krisi]

I would just love for my wife to call me by a feminine name when I am dressed as a female. I wouldn't mind even if I was naked or dressed as a man, just not in public. Heck, I might put up with it in public if that's what it takes.

Is there something in your drinking water that started her doing that? Would you share some with the rest of us, please?

BTW: There are three different feminine names running through my head. One is a female name based on my male name and that is probably the one she would use. Another is the name my mother planned to give me if I had been born a girl and the third is the one I use here.

[Alice_2014_B]

Sounds like something I personally would care for; but many here would for sure.

[Joni T]

Why do you need to be in lingerie and hose to get intimate???
Jon

[Lana Mae]

Your GF is being intimate with Amanda and Amanda wants to be called George or whatever??? I do not plan to be intimate with anyone else since my wife passed away but if I was and she called me Lana Mae or even just Lana she would have my undivided attention!! LOL Best wishes Hugs Lana Mae

[CONSUELO]

Yes, be happy, be very happy and make her happy too.

[Mark/Rebecca]

If this is something that she finds enjoyable, why would you take that from her given the compromise she has made letting Amanda into her life? It is possible she is doing it because she feels that you will respond to it positively. Even if this is the case, what a wonderful gift of acceptance she has given you. I wouldn't risk hurting her feelings.

[JocelynJames]

Elizabeth,
I have been in the same position( no pun intended). In my case, I figured if she's going to be in , she's going to be all in. Eventually I've just let it be she can call me whatever she wants. I'm hers and she's mine. If you are actually uncomfortable with it you two should talk. To me it was just a bit weird after going by J**** for 40 some odd years then hearing someone call me Jocelyn. Pleasant but weird. Like everything else, we're all different.

[Maria 60]

My wife usally only uses my female name more out in public like "do you think Maria would like this, or does Maria want this, or when is Maria going to clean up her things. More like that, don't remember her saying during sex or calling me in the house, but I would be Ok with it, as long as she doesn't start making mistakes and calling me Maria by accident.

[Kim_Bitzflick]

If I read your post correctly, you are changing your name legally to Amanda. Why wouldn't she start calling you Amanda?

[ellbee]

My wife usally only uses my female name more out in public like ... when is Maria going to clean up her things.

Why do I find this so funny??


Maybe because Laura's room looks a teenage girl's right now with all these clothes everywhere, as if they had been through a tornado or something?

[reb.femme]

My wife often states that I can leave a room looking like a teenage daughter would .

I do clear up, but the whole process of dressing for me can be akin to the aftermath of a storm.

Becky

[BayBeeBlue]

In an argument (recently) about my CDing my wife called me a lot of things but she also called me Mariah/Kaitlyn/Bitch... etc etc.
We are on a different page now together and enjoyng each other and now jokingly she calls me her bitch and Mariah if I'm being a bit of a Diva.
The thing about it for me is that every time she does this in an argument or in a joke I got very turned on by it.
Enjoy and embrace what you have.

[Amanda Katharine]

No, not legally. I just meant on this site. I have no desire to transition or present full time as a woman.

[Sheila11]

When I first started going out it and I had the opportunity to introduce myself to someone it was odd to hear me say it let alone hear it from someone else. It just takes a while to get used to. Imagine you changed your guy name. There would be times you would wonder who someone was calling to when they were trying to get your attention.

[phili]

I'm in the minority but I don't use a femme name- the whole idea for me is that I am a man who likes to be feminine at times. I don't want to split myself into two.

[Krisi]

I am also a man who likes to be feminine at times but when I am presenting as a female, I can't imagine me calling myself "Homer". Hence "Krisi".

It's no more than the wig, the boobs and the butt. We need all the help we can get, even mentally.

[KimberlyJean]

So, I finally went out to a social setting and actually interacted with other people besides SA's. After a wonderful young lady asked me to sit with them I introduced myself as Kimberly, for the rest of the evening I answered to Kimberly/Kim and it felt very right. It is the name my mother was going to give me when I was supposed to be born a girl. But she kinda named me after the fact by telling me later. For me though I have never really liked my male names. Maybe the name Amanda isn't your right name?

[PeggyNell]

Have You thought of other names? Does the name Amanda have meaning to you? I have just in the past 6 months or so have been able to start expressing my feminine side. I chose Peggy as my name for now. I have only heard it out loud saying it to the mirror. I haven't heard anyone say it to me yet. I believe in changing and growing is a part of self discovery in CD. So I may change my name later. I have also consider having different names for how I feel when I am dressed a certain way. That's my thoughts. If Amanda sounds odd to you play around with other names.

[AlyssaJ]

As you're finding out from the responses, what you have got there is merely a dream for many of the members here. Most of us, myself included, would absolutely LOVE to have our partners call us by our chosen female name at anytime, let alone when we're getting intimate. Honestly, this is a terrific sign of her progressing acceptance. She's accepted you as a female when you're dressed, is that the problem? You want to dress but not actually be looked at as female? For me as a non-binary gender identity, that's hard for me to understand as when I'm in female mode, I want to be treated as a female.

Ultimately, I'm thinking you gotta find the answer to why it bothers you and then have a very straight-forward (but gentle) talk with her about it.