Feeling Sexy, Is This Why ???

[deebra]

If you analyze why you are drawn to crossdressing could feeling and being sexy be a big part of the reason for it? Doesn't being like this make you feel good??? Women are pretty and they are sexy and they get a lot of attention when they dress. Eye candy. Men are not pretty and men do not draw as much physical attention as women and the clothes women wear has a lot to do with it plus "certain" female clothing make the wearer feel sexy and men's clothing aren't made to do this. My survey says women far out number men when it comes to being seen in a sexual way, add to this their breasts and butt protruding where a man's doesn't but it's the female clothes that sexually enhance a woman's body more so than male clothes do on a man. Add a man's libido being six times stronger than a woman's so he is drawn to look at her in a sexual way and he also see's the sexy clothes and how they make her and her body parts so sexually attractive to him. So straying from the straight and narrow wouldn't he be curious how it would look and feel trying on these female sexy clothes??? Maybe he could feel as sexy as these women present; once dressed doesn't the mirror affirm this??? He's hooked, the mirror did it, he loves the look and feel; he's discovered something new, a feeling he's never had before and he's not giving up something that feels this good. Thus you now have a male to female crossdresser????

The above paragraph says "a big part", not all; take me for example, at four years old I tried on my little playmates girl shoes and didn't want to take them off or give them back, even at that age the feeling was electric, I was hooked (for life), thus a male to female crossdresser was born.

[2B Natasha]

WOW! Some of you try so HARD to find a justification for the why.

And no. I don't think you can make a crossdresser. Either they are or they are not. Playing. Let's put on the girlfriends panties as a lark isn't going to change anybody.

Cheers

[Teresa]

Deebra,
Clothes designers put a lot of thought into what their designs can do for women, and yes some women do love clothes that can make them feel and look sexy. Some women love that appeal and others can't find the confidence for many reasons to pull it off.

I'm sure Reine might reply that some male clothes can make them look handsome even sexy, if we're not interested in that maybe we won't see it.
To bring it down to basics if you want a man to perform then you have to find what turns him on, sometimes we do become saturated with those images even in everyday life. Almost every aspect of women's needs appear to have sexual overtones in advertising these days, nothing is off limits.
As for the sexual turn on for CDing , I admit my male / female sides are intertwined with my sexual needs. Some time ago I did ask the question of who we appeal to , I personally don't dress to attract a man, being bi-gender I dress to attract a woman. As Reine pointed out not many women are interested in the suggestion of a lesbian relationship , I must admit that's the comment my wife makes , but I'm afraid that's what is going on inside my head !
I do look in the mirror and feel good, but it's not a case of being hooked, I feel comfortable and a satisfaction that my needs are being met. I shop because I like to put outfits together, my female side enjoys that.

[Mickitv]

Although I admire your statements regarding why many of us do something. However, on the other hand I look at it differently. I say enjoy it while you can and hope for the best.

[Judith96a]

For the most part, men's clothes don't do anything for how I feel about myself - they're purely functional. The single exception is that if I'm going for a job interview or similar, a well-cut suit, shirt, tie, polished shoes etc does bolster my confidence.
Slipping on a dress, and discovering that it not only fits but is reasonably flattering, has an entirely different effect. The words that immediately spring to mind are excitement, exhilaration & delight. Do I feel sexy? I suppose so. Who am I doing it for? Not the guys - they're welcome to look and admire (if they're so inclined) but not touch. Girls? They're welcome But fundamentally, I dress up for me, to feel good about myself! Funnily enough, some time ago my wife (who doesn't know about Judith and would not approve) and I had a conversation about why women dress up and she said exactly the same thing.

[Stephanie47]

I tried decades ago trying to figure out the "Why." Why do I have a desire to wear women's clothing? I don't know. I know I was drawn to women's clothing before I knew "sex" or "sexuality" existed. I loved the feel of my mother's nylon slips which were hanged to dry in the sole bathroom of our apartment. I did not know squat about sexual urges. Six did not exist for little boys in the early 1950's. I ascribe to the notion that there is a component of DNA in each person related to the sex opposite of his or her physical birth status. It is logical if the female component of DNA is strong a man may be drawn to somehow emulating a woman. It's also logical to me men will do all things possible to repress those feelings....to deny yourself.

[DarthDaddicus]

I personally believe in reincarnation, so I think that there are those of us who are transitioning into or out of the next or previous life and we either harbor habits from the previous life or we are preparing our souls for the next one.

[Dana44]

Yes I felt sexy years ago. and I tried everything and wow is all I can say. Now I am aged and still feel good and perhaps sexy. But I love women and not too interested in men. But they do look at me as I look younger in feminine clothing. But yes we are hooked for life and things change through life experiences.. .

[Patrica Gil]

Been dressing for years now. Started to underdress at the age of 13. Then we didn't have pantyhose. We wore a pantygirdle with thigh high nylons. Shaved my legs because I don't like being hairy. Still shave and looking to get hair removed from my body because I still don't like being hairy. My hair is long, a lot of work to care for, but I happen to enjoy this way. Pretty much do girly stuff because I like it. Many days went to school or wherever underdressed because I like it. Same goes today. Met someone who loves me for me. Oddly she makes me feel sexy, not the clothes.

[Lorileah]

Guess that's one perspective. Considering that each gender has attributes the other finds attractive, I think men can dress sexily too. Otherwise all those male actors in Hollywood would not have fans during the Oscars

[NancySue]

I've been dressing long before I knew what sex(y) meant. The instant I put on my first pair of hose and panties, I was hooked. I've progressed to a full wardrobe. Now, I dress according to how I feel and yes, there are times I do dress to look as sexy as possible...black panties, nylons, bra...a little more makeup, brighter lipstick 💄,higher heels, etc. My wife usually will help adding or suggesting some enhancements. Sometimes this makes me want to go out, but, I definitely would not blend in. 💁, so I just enjoy. Maybe take a picture or two.

[Taylor186]

I have to say that I don't relate to, nor do I agree with the premise of, anything stated in the first paragraph of the OP.

[Rachael Leigh]

I'm with a lot of some of the comments here I don't know why but it's just me I love getting dressed doing my makeup and
maybe there is a sexual component to it to feel pretty but it's not my modivation it's just me

[DIANEF]

Women are 'pretty and sexy', or they're clever, smart, educated and more than eye candy for men. A mans libido is six times sronger than a womans, in a few cases maybe. A man is curious to try on sexy clothes and bang! he's a MtF crossdresser, I think the majority of CDers have had a much longer journey than that. I can see what you are trying to say but you have way too many generalisations.

[JenniferR771]

Its instinct. Women like to wear pretty clothes, and bright colors, because from a young age, they know boys like to look at them so attired. Tall heels, spectacular hair, tight skirt--not always comfortable, but women love to be noticed and hate to be ignored. As a crossdresser, I like the clothes, but the big thrill is when I see myself all dolled-up in a mirror. Then my brain says to myself, "Myself you are with a very pretty woman." Its hormones.

As a man I have never noticed women looking at me or giving me much attention because I was wearing a suit and a nice tie.

At a gay club in Saugatuck at on the TG weekend--one time when I was wearing a really nice dress, tall heels and pretty long blond wig--I noticed a lot of people glancing at me. And most of them were gay men. Go figure.

[Judy-Somthing]

I find when dressing up goes well, hair, makeup, dress fits right, etc. It just feels so right.

It would be very hard for me to stop. For me it's not the feeling of the clothes that I like, it's the feeling I get when I look in the mirror.

[Lorileah]

which refutes almost every other animal in the world where the male is more colorful or has better accessories. It also is contrary to history where men wore fancier, brighter, more poofy clothing than the women did

[Tracii G]

It never ceases to amaze me how some here have the overwhelming desire to over analyze everything.
In doing so there is a better than average chance your conclusions will be false anyway so why bother?

[Micki_Finn]

WOW! Some of you try so HARD to find a justification for the why.

Do you know why the why is so important? Because it cuts to the heart of our acceptance as human beings. Look at homosexuality. The church repressed people for hundreds of years based on why (you're gay BECAUSE you made a choice to be sinful). Think about how quickly attitudes about homosexuality did a very rapid 180 once we could ascribe they "why" to genetics and not a choice or mental illness.

[Tracii G]

Micki that is the best answer I have heard yet as to the why question. Thank you.

[Lucy23]

I'm no fashion designer, but I don't think clothes for men are designed the same way as are clothes for women, in other words to appear sexy, with intricate details... I could go on. With that said however, I really agree with what Teresa said: "If we're not interested in that, maybe we won't see it."

My exgirlfriend (and a few female friends too) told me she loved it when I rolled sleeves on a shirt, even found it sexy. However, for me it's only the prefered way to wear a shirt.

We are not used to see men's clothes the same way as women's. However, have a look at certain guys' Instagram accounts; certainly it's my opinion, but those men sure know how to dress to draw attention. I wouldn't say they look sexy in the way I would in the case of a woman, but they do look handsome.

As for the crossdressing, I must admit that I wear the clothes I would find attractive, even sexy on a woman. I guess that somehow transfers to me when I have them on, because there are a few items I would dare to say I feel sexy in. At the same time, there are more than enough items I just like to wear. I really can't describe it in other way than it just feels good. However, the same feeling arises when I have my best men's clothes a tailor made based on what I wanted. It just feels good.

As for why... Everytime I have thought that this is it, everytime I have realized there is enough evidence to either support or undermine the claims.

[docrobbysherry]

You're premise that "regular" men would want to try on women's clothes for ANY reason, I mean. I had no CD thots for 50 years. During those years I had live in GG lovers and a wife. Plenty of access to their clothes privately. The thing is, regular guys never even think about putting on women's things. They only think about getting women out of them!

My ex and I changed roles for a Halloween party about 7 years before I began. Dressing up as a woman made such an impression on me that I only recalled the event 10 years AFTER I began dressing!

As for looking and feeling sexy? Your dam rite I do! And, I go to great lengths to enphasize the fem body parts u mentioned. Unlike most dressers who seem satisfied with breast forms alone.

But, be careful, Deebra. If u mention that u feel sexy dressed often here? They'll assume u have sex when dressed and label u a fetish dresser like me!

[Acastina]

I tried decades ago trying to figure out the "Why." Why do I have a desire to wear women's clothing? I don't know. I know I was drawn to women's clothing before I knew "sex" or "sexuality" existed. I loved the feel of my mother's nylon slips which were hanged to dry in the sole bathroom of our apartment. I did not know squat about sexual urges. Six did not exist for little boys in the early 1950's. I ascribe to the notion that there is a component of DNA in each person related to the sex opposite of his or her physical birth status. It is logical if the female component of DNA is strong a man may be drawn to somehow emulating a woman. It's also logical to me men will do all things possible to repress those feelings....to deny yourself.

I'm not sure it's "a component of DNA" or anything else that fundamental. The best hypothesis I'm familiar with is prenatal hormonal anomalies that affect how our brains get wired for self-association with one sex or the other, and for the arousal characteristics of the mating urge. The first is what we call gender identity, and the second is sexual orientation.

Our brains are analogous to computers; really, really elaborate and capable computers. If there's unusual code in the firmware, mistaken neural connections hard-wired in the early weeks and months of gestation, that resulted from Mom passing you an inappropriately timed or dosed cocktail of hormones in utero, you may turn out to have a self-sense that's coded backwards from your biological sex, or respond sexually to members of your own biological sex, or both, or some combination (e.g., bisexual, straight crossdresser). The complexity of the brain and its wiring, and the number of possible mis-doses at critical times would explain a lot about the seemingly infinite variety of manifestations, try as we might to gather and collate them into discrete boxes for description and taxonomy.

It's the only hypothesis that really begins to explain why a single-digit percentage of biological males manifest identities and orientations other than cis-hetero. If we're wired this way, that's pretty much it, and we can deny or drink or drug ourselves to try to suppress it at our peril. Or we can accept that it simply is, without needing to know why. There is great peace in believing we were born this way, and that our path to a healthy and happy life is different in ways that society, unfortunately, chooses to stigmatize.

What evidence can I offer? It would take experimentation on developing fetuses to test the hypothesis, and no one's going to go there, but I can draw inferences from my own family history. I was the third son of a couple that kept trying to have a daughter, and they told me as much when I was a toddler with a sister one year younger. I'm transgender (to a degree that is still a work-in-progress), while that sister grew up profoundly tomboyish, had/has zero interest in girly things, and has lived a lonely life as an unpartnered lesbian. So, two normals, one misfired boy, followed by a misfired girl, followed by a premie who died in infancy, followed by a hysterectomy. Something was off in Mom's reproductive system.

As the Randy Newman song goes: I could be wrong now/But I don't think so.

Some things we will never know, but it's useful to ponder them just the same.

BTW, off topic, does anyone else find it strange that the spelling checker for this site flags "crossdresser"?

[Alice_2014_B]

I dress up to look as good as possible.
Suppose I do not need to analyze why.

[TinaMc]

Do you know why the why is so important? Because it cuts to the heart of our acceptance as human beings. Look at homosexuality. The church repressed people for hundreds of years based on why (you're gay BECAUSE you made a choice to be sinful). Think about how quickly attitudes about homosexuality did a very rapid 180 once we could ascribe they "why" to genetics and not a choice or mental illness.

There have been some revisions to this theory since... (see https://www.theguardian.com/science/...ality-gay-gene for example).