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Thread: Advice Ladies

  1. #1
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    Advice Ladies

    So a friend of mine on facebook that i used to work with posted this yesterday. Sweet lady that i know but i don't know her really well. I sent her a private message and thanked her for the post and that it was nice to know some people are so caring and warm. We had a good talk. I didn't bring up that i am a crossdresser but did hint that i may at some point appreciate an opportunity to get something off my chest. She would have no clue i am, we left it that we need to grab lunch and catch up on life. I plan on feeling her out and it would be nice to a have a friend but am scared to open that door and i would need awhile to do so. What do you ladies think?

    "My door is ALWAYS open, warm kettle is always ready and my sofa is always a warm place of peace and NO judgement. Any of my friends who need to chat are welcome--anytime. It's no good suffering in silence. I have wine in the cupboard, soda in the fridge, tea & coffee in the drawers, and I will always be here...you are welcome whenever!! 💗

    Blue Monday is a name given to a day in January (typically the third Monday of the month) reported to be the most depressing day of the year. And with January being the worst month for suicides, it's always good to talk - but even better to listen.......
    Feel free to copy and post this. SPREAD LOVE, ACCEPTANCE, FORGIVENESS & PEACE.

    And kids are always welcome."

  2. #2
    Member wanda66's Avatar
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    Good luck i hope it works out ,myself i believe i would jump at the chance.

  3. #3
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I think if u r interested in her as a potential partner, no, not yet.

    Even if u simply may want her as a close friend, no. Not yet.

    Unless there is a NEED to tell someone or u r coming out anyway, don't tell. Once u get to know this woman better, you'll have a feeling about not telling her or telling her and if so, when!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  4. #4
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I agree with Doc, do not tell her unless you get serious with her and before commitment.
    Part Time Girl

  5. #5
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    I should clarify I am married and she is married. This is not romantic at all. Just a potential friend to help me navigate this road

  6. #6
    Silver Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarah87 View Post
    I should clarify I am married and she is married. This is not romantic at all. Just a potential friend to help me navigate this road
    My first question then, would be, Why is this woman more suitable to confide in than your wife. I am sorry, but a share on Facebook is stretching it a bit. Maybe not. Obviously, you know this person and I do not, but I'd like to hear your thoughts on why you'd choose her to open up to.
    Then there's the question of what will happen if your wife learns of this trust that you've shared with another woman, instead of her. The relationship may be purely platonic and completely innocent, but it still may well be seen as a betrayal.
    I understand the need to share. I do. And I lack the perspective of one who's had to hide something like this from a spouse, but if there is a common thread to the story of most of members here in such a situation, it's that the secret is going to come out, sooner or later, one way or another. So consider that too as you decide what to share and with whom, please.

    Hugs,


    Kelly

  7. #7
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    My take in this is she is wi)Ling to repost /share a post in Facebook. Does that equal truly being excepting of all? I can Not speak as to how she really feels as I don't know her at all. I have had friends share the exact post who I know are not fully excepting of all but are there to lend an ear. Or be a shoulder to cry on. They may very well listen and do nothing with the information other then have an effect on their thoughts of you. Is this a person you know well enough to risk her telling others?

  8. #8
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
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    I'd proceed with caution. I know from personal experience that even the closest friendships can break down and people can become spiteful and vindictive. Not saying that's the case here but it does happen.
    Here today, gone tomorrow....

  9. #9
    Senior Member Nikkilovesdresses's Avatar
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    Could be a trap

    I don't know, call me cynical, but something doesn't feel right about this.
    I used to have a short attention spa

  10. #10
    Silver Member IleneD's Avatar
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    Sarah;
    Keep your distance.
    Don't confuse co-workers, acquaintances or close neighbors as FRIENDS.
    I know you're bursting to tell the world about You. Proceed with extreme caution with another woman not your wife.
    There resides within me a Woman, and she is powerful.
    She has been my Grace and Bearing on the stormiest seas.
    I could no more deny Her than I would my own soul.

  11. #11
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    Several of my male and female friends posted the same thing. I think it's just people who want to help on what is perceived to be a sad day.

  12. #12
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    How bout that... I got the same email message! Was her initials CA?
    However none of the comments seemed to resemble yours.
    It would be funny if we have the same FaceBook friends.

  13. #13
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    Yeah, don't do it.. that message is just a copy paste.. a few of the known "do-gooders" on my feed posted the same.

    It's not meant for you.
    It's meant for them... And their LIKES.

  14. #14
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    Sarah,
    If you chose to tell someone, so far I've found nothing drastic happens.

    Sometime ago I posted a thread about completing a painting, it was an old railway station and on the left side was a very empty platform , I decided it needed a waiting passenger sitting on a bench , I didn't have anything suitable to work from so I dressed in a skirt and blouse, put a jacket on with heels and took a photograph at the correct angle and lighting. Most of my painting group like the addition but I let it slip that it was me in the painting, I'm now working on another canvas of my town station and I'm constantly being told it needs a suitable lady in the picture.

    I'm not bothered anymore who knows about my dressing but that was a great way of coming out, the problem is I need to sell the painting.

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