Maybe he's waiting for you to make a move. Grab him by the hand, tell him to change into man mode and you will make him want to be a man tonight. Then show him a really good time.
Maybe he's waiting for you to make a move. Grab him by the hand, tell him to change into man mode and you will make him want to be a man tonight. Then show him a really good time.
Due to a work injury yesterday, all bets are off. He fell off a ladder from 12 ft up and landed on his right side on a support beam. He is out of commission for now. But as soon as he's better, things will change as far as him wanting to be in man-mode.
This could be an important piece of advice here. It's possible that he's been waiting for you to give him a signal that you're ready. It could also be that his sexuality is getting tied up with his gender so that he feels more sexual in "girl mode" and doesn't know how to deal with that. Just be patient and keep the communication flowing.Originally Posted by StephanieM
Ohh I see. The problem isn't from the dressing it's from an injury. That's tough too. Maybe you can ask him to snuggle up while you watch a movie or something. Exchange back rubs perhaps. My wife had an injury last year and we didn't get any intimate time, what I missed the most was her laying on my shoulder at night before we went to sleep. So I kind of know how you feel.
Actually the problem started days before the injury. He just hurt himself on the same day I was going to speak to him about issues. However, he is in so much pain that intimacy of any kind hurts.
Oh I see.
This phase sucks because you really can't say anything without seeming like a jerk. Maybe after he heals up he will show you more affection. You know the absence makes the heart fonder cliché.
Don't forget, it is a two way street. The more affection you show him, especially in male mode, the more he will show you back. Some times to receive what you want you may have to give a bit more. Maybe he would like a back rub too, then reciprocate and give you one back. I notice that when I pay attention to my wife she is more attentive to my needs to. Some say it is a minipulative, but I think it is what you do when you are committed and love someone.
Nikki I am so glad you were able to talk to your SO about this! In ANY relationship, communication is so vital to understanding one another. You could live with someone for a hundred years and you would still not be able to dope out the others thoughts.
Understand that there will be bumps, but patience, understanding and talking it out will be the best plan. Hoping for the best for you both.
Before you can love another, you must first like yourself
I Aim To Misbehave
Labels belong on BOXES, not PEOPLE!
Yes, you need to share your feelings with him. The place you're coming from is that you love him, you love being with him sexually and in all the other ways, and you've been missing out on some of that. You need for him to be as accepting and caring toward you as you have been to him. I think the key is to focus on your love for him, and your need for him to be a part of your life, as you are a part of his. Best of luck to you, dear.
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Oh ... sorry ... I just read your response in which you said you had brought the subject up. Sounds like you handled it pretty well. After the initial resistance from him, it also sounds like he's moving in the right direction. You are a real blessing to him. I hope he appreciates that.
I agree with this. As much as we wish to emulate women, we're still men underneath it all (something that you might sometimes forget, too, as in this case). We're men, and we're pretty clueless when it comes to other people's feelings. While your girlfriends will automatically sense when something's wrong when you're not feeling right, men simply don't see it. We're not built that way. We need direct conversational notice when you want something from us; in almost all cases, we're happy to comply! But expecting a guy to become as sensitive to other people's feelings as a woman is? Rare. I've studied body language and psychology extensively, and I still fall into the routine of not noticing women's moods unless I actively focus hard to do it. I suspect that's what your husband is like, too. As an example, I refer you to the old routine where the guy asks what's wrong, and his wife insists that if he cared, he'd just KNOW automatically what's wrong. Unfortunately, life doesn't work like that. Talk to your husband when you want something. Otherwise, he's probably not going to notice when something's wrong. He's not doing it on purpose, that's what you need to remember.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
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