How I know I'm not typical

[suzanne]

I have always felt I am not a "normal" male. Not better, not worse, just operating on a different plane. But it has been coming into sharper focus since I began going out in public while dressed.

Examples: when I see a particularly beautiful woman, I am not thinking how much I would like to have sex with her, like a lot of men would. I'm thinking about how much I'd like to look like her, or have her legs, hair, bust etc.

If I am checking out how a woman is dressed, it is to examine whether what she has on would work on me.

While dressed, I have on many occasions, been in surprisingly intimate conversations with women. Like the time I mentioned having had my legs waxed, and it evolved into the SA telling me about her Brazilian wax job (yikes). TMI, perhaps, but we had fun with it, and I didn't get the sense either of us was uncomfortable about it.

Today, while having conversation with my favorite dress shop SA, a woman appeared from the fitting rooms asking for our opinions about the dress she was trying on. And she wanted MY opinion as much as the SA's. (She looked wonderful and I was a bit jealous) If I weren't dressed, she would have asked me. Other than her husband, no man's opinion matters.

I love it. No one would mistake me for a woman, but I feel like I'm accepted as One Of The Girls. A skirt really seems to announce, "I am not a typical male. I can be taken into your confidence". Maybe that sounds potentially dangerous in the context of the bathroom controversy, but I'm a firm believer that no abuser would ever go to the extreme of putting on a skirt just to get access to vulnerable females.

[Genny B]

Sounds typical to me... just saying.

Genny B

[Tracii G]

Totally typical suzanne LOLOL

[Rachael Leigh]

Suzanne I'm with you on this, I do seem different and well I know I am and ever sense I can remember I have felt like well
I'm not one of the boys. I look at women as well thinking I love her dress or top and think could I pull that off.
I don't have an allusion either that I pass completely as a women but I feel as if I belong more there than in guy mode.

[suzanne]

Typical for us, you mean?

[Jean 103]

Sounds pretty normal to me. But then I'm out, it brings tears to my eyes thinking back to when my girl friends first accepted me as one of the girls. I have found I'm treated better when I'm wearing a skirt.

[ginapoodle]

I completely relate, on all levels.

[Dana44]

Sound like atypical day out good for you Suzanne.

[Nikki A.]

It is funny how women are so different than men in that they take you into their confidence when you're dressed.

[jack-ie]

I agree, Nikki. To many women, when you put on a wig and a little makeup, you become
one of the girls. For me, that couldn't be better if I'd written the script.

[IleneD]

This may be one of the un-perceived joys of going out in public dressed up.
There may be a lot of good reasons; among them just the sheer liberty of Being You. But when the girls begin to count me in as one of the girls, I get a special tickle about it. So much fun. It really is a special kind of "acceptance" that's great for the soul.

[Alice B]

I fully understand and agree with where yu are coming from

[alwayshave]

I am at the point where I am checking out the clothing, so much so that that when my fiancee sees me looking, she'll say like that dress do you?

[Beverley Sims]

I don't think you know how typical you are.
The rest of us here experience the same feelings.........
All the time. :-)

[Joanne108]

For me knowing I'm not a typical male is always obvious in thought and my behavior. It is most obvious several days each month when I strive to portray a beautiful woman. It no longer bothers me as I come to know everyone is not typical in their own way.

Consider the other day my wife and I are at Kohl's in the bra section.She is looking for a new bra and we are both going through the racks. She told me what she wanted and I didn't ask any questions. A lady asked how I knew what to look for. My wife smiled and said "We have excellent communication". My wife knows I dress and was using me for bra type and comfort advice. She also knew I wouldn't be put out by helping her find a bra or hanging out in the women's clothing section.

[Fiona123]

Good post Suzanne. We're not typical males to be sure. I accept my inner femininity -- it's ok not to be typical.

[suzy1]

I had to read your coment again to see if you were not talking about me?

[deebra]

I relate to and agree with all of the above and I to have been befriended by SAs and other women while dressed in public and complimented on how nice the women's clothes looked on me. Also I asked them and they said they saw nothing wrong with me wearing female clothing. So if so many women take you in, want to befriend you and accept you as one of them then why are wives so turned off by a mate that shares this female mindset with them as well as performing his male marriage duties. Aren't they getting more with a CD mate than just a straight husband?? Are more women accepting of a male wearing female clothing than we think??? Do they see a CD as being on their page and liking what they like plus performing as a male. If you know the answer then let me know, this could be a whole new thread.

[Laura912]

It is interesting that, even when en homme, most women will relate to me differently. Maybe there are some vibes being transmitted that this is a non-threatening male of mixed gender.

[SaraLin]

So if so many women take you in, want to befriend you and accept you as one of them then why are wives so turned off by a mate that shares this female mindset with them as well as performing his male marriage duties. .

Deebra, I think it's that little thing called sex. Let's face it, most women out there aren't sexually attracted to other women, so a man's wife who finds out he likes to be "girly" will be less than thrilled. Conversely, women who aren't in a relationship with the T* person are likely to feel that this person is less likely to be pursuing them sexually - and can relax more around them.

That - and that we are often less "guy-ish" makes it more suitable for us to end up in the friend zone than in the husband/lover zone.

[Amelie]

The other woman probably thought you were gay. A non threat and someone with a keen sense of style and fashion.

[Stacy Darling]

I like the way you think!

Stacy!

[Nikki A.]

Those women who know I dress sometimes tell me or ask me about things that are decidedly female. I used to help my friend shop for jewelry and purses and she'd also ask me what I thought of some of the clothing (including trying things on to check for sizing) for her store. My office manager (being the only female) has me as her go to for second opinions or questions or if she needs something. I often get from her "You're the only one here that I can ask". Yes she knows and has been out with me. When there were 3 girls working here I once walked into the office while they were talking. One just looked at me and said "just keep on talking he's like one of us." Someone else, when I confided that I dressed said she wasn't surprised, she always thought I had a feminine aura. Not gay, but fem.

[Alice Torn]

I still remember some of the girls i saw in high school, their dresses, hose, legs, shoes. I dress up like one in particular who lived on a farm a mile form us. She was, is six feet two, stunning long legs, great figure, face! Only, she is long time married now, ne ver would date me. Now i "date" her as Alice, same name as her.

[Barbara Black]

Not only am I thinking, "I'd like her dress", but also, "I'd like her butt." and not necessarily for sexual purposes.