Do you ever feel silly about all this?

[karentvca]

For those of us who are very part-time dressers, who do it for some escape and erotic fun, do you ever feel silly about it?

I mean here I am, a grown man in his 50s with no intention of transitioning or living fulll-time, or coming out to everyone in my family and circle of friends, getting positively woozy from the sight/touch/mention of lingerie, stockings, high heels and the like. Sometimes I sit back and think about this "little" obsession of mine and wonder, "Am I wasting my time here? Couldn't I be doing something more constructive? is this all just a little bit silly?"

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE crossdressing and try to do the best job I can in impersonating a woman. I just wonder sometimes if it's all just a bit much.

What do you think?

[Aileen]

Well, I went by my male name here and put off using a female name for a long time, because I did feel silly about it. For me it's just a fun hobby, not a way of life, and I don't want to insist that everyone use the "she" pronoun when referring to me.

But it is just fun. Hey, even GGs are not deadly serious about putting on a dress. Are there any GGs out there who have dresses that would cause them to get suicidal if they were ruined? Me neither.

[karentvca]

Thanks Aileen... You know, I once asked that question in person to the leader of a support group here in Canada and she looked at me like I was positively wacky (which may have been true at the time). She had no idea what I was talking about. Further prooof that we all dress up for very individual reasons which is what makes CDs so fascinating.

[Alex R]

For those of us who are very part-time dressers, who do it for some escape and erotic fun, do you ever feel silly about it?

I know what you mean - I'm late forties and really just started crossdressing seriously after absolute years of asking "will I, won't I" - and yes sometimes I do ask "what's this all about then?"

For me it's a great buzz and not the start of a total transformation - I'm more than happy with the male me and the typical male things I do - go for a beer, talk about football (soccer to the US) and all that stuff - other guys have their golf at weekends, I just have a bit of secret dressing - everyone to their own

[Snookums]

I feel silly about everythang I do

[Alexandria]

Mmm, I do feel a bit silly and even weirded out sometimes. Other days I feel fantastic, turned on even.

It depends on how I'm feeling at the moment.

[Julie York]

I know exactly what you mean. It's like suddenly standing back from a situation and thinking......."This is just absurd! What AM I doing!"

The interesting thing though, is that when you do it and it feels good, it has a sort of logic to it, then you know that it is right somehow and of no harm to anyone.

But when you get that sensation of stepping back and seeing the absurdity it....I mean you're a bloke (and not that young in my case) and you're preening and flouncing about like someone in a Woody Alan comedy. It makes me understand the horror and repulsion someone else might feel, seeing it from the outside and having no clue at all of what is going on in my head.

[trannie T]

It is silly. It is also what I am.

[Kimberley]

I think that for the most part I have never really felt that way although there have been a few times......result? Purge then regret, then depression... and so the cycle went.

Today I dont feel that at all. Today I feel....... just me. It is something that I cant really describe. How do you describe a feeling or emotion?

Kimberley.

[karentvca]

I know exactly what you mean. It's like suddenly standing back from a situation and thinking......."This is just absurd! What AM I doing!"

I mean you're a bloke (and not that young in my case) and you're preening and flouncing about like someone in a Woody Alan comedy.

You know, the absurdity of how we sometimes feel may be a result of how crossdressing has been protrayed as something weird, dangerous or just plain funny. There has never been enough portrayals that show us as regular people (though not necesarily regular guys) doing something that, in the end, is healthy for everyone.

What CDs and the CDing movement need is a good PR company! Think about what ideas and products have been sold and unsold as a result of great PR. Drunk driving and smoking cigarettes have been greatly diminished through years of good (and constant) PR. Next on the list: fast foods and trans fats. Exercise is now more popular because of PR. These things and ideas now enjoy a DIFFERENT place in culture's psyche because the PR has worked.

Crossdressing could use the same treatment. Yes, it would take years, but with the right messages, we could actually be widely accepted as a good thing rather than a comical thing.

I'm getting off my soapbox now, because I am sure you are all trying to look up my skirt.

[KathrynW]

Do you ever feel silly about all this?
Absolutely! Guys aren't supposed to want to wear girl's clothes!
Didn't you KNOW THAT?

I'm getting off my soapbox now, because I am sure you are all trying to look up my skirt.

Actually, I think Julie York was trying to do exactly that...but not me...

[Julie York]

I know what colour they are and I'm not telling.

But back on topic.....

[Alexis Ann]

I really dress only about every other weekend, or on long holidays. I do have my moments...

"This is soooooooo heavenly "

or

"What the frack am i doin?" And then i dont dress for awhile.

It doesn't rule my life but it is an interesting and fun diversion. If i am not in the mood, i simply don't do it. Odd that on the long weekends i DO do it more.

Silly or not, in the mood or not...it's as much a piece of me as say....my......



foot.

Alexis

[Julie Avery]

I suppose you might imagine yourself feeding the starving or performing some other useful service if you weren't dressing, but if you're like me, more likely the time would be spent fishing and watching football on TV. Both of those are pretty silly if you look at them in a certain way. My daughter nearly ruined fishing for me when she offhandedly remarked that she didn't understand what I found so satisfying about outsmarting fish

[uknowhoo]

**holds nose and chokes out the words:** Julie York's words pretty much sum up how I feel about it. :sick:

Yeah, on occasion I take a step back to appreciate the absurdity of the situation... and smile. Comedy and absurdity are two things I value in my life.

Hugs,

Tammi

[Sophia Rearen]

My daughter nearly ruined fishing for me when she offhandedly remarked that she didn't understand what I found so satisfying about outsmarting fish

Thanks for that Julie! Wait, that may be a good way to look at it. Now, less fishing and more dressing.

[Clementine]

This is a wonderful thread, I've heard so much from all of you that goes through my head as well - as fun, relaxing, thrilling, etc. etc. as dressing up can be, I do have those moments where I say "you know, there IS a reason people make fun of this ..." - don't know how much is the guilt talking ...

I've gone through the "binge, purge" cycle with my attire a few times, too...

Thanks for sharing, galz - great end of the workday reading!

- Clementine xx

[randi_789]

And here I thought I was the only one who felt this way. After I have been dressed for hours and spend a lot of that time online, much of it in this forum, I stop and think that perhaps I could have spent the time doing something else, something a little more constructive and not have wasted all that time. But then the next opportunity arises and I wouldn't want to do anything else. So much to come to terms with in this "hobby".

[pammiecd]

I don't feel silly about it. I feel I was born with it as I can trace it back to about 4 yrs. old. It's a big part of my life, and in my 50's it's only getting stronger.

[ashlee chiffon]

i've got a black evening dress with chiffon overlay that i want to be buried in when i go!
but...guess that's not the same as committing suicide over a ruined dress *though i would be verrrry sad if anything happened to it!*

[Teresa Amina]

Best sort of silly I've ever experienced! Absurd, sure, but isn't it a thrill most of the time?

[Adrienne Heels]

It's just harmless fun....and besides, I look so good as a woman!!

[Joy Carter]

Can't help but love what I do just don't do it often enough to get the silly notion into my head that it's wrong any more.

[TGMarla]

Yes, absolutely, Karen. It's very absurd. Like Julie said, I'm a guy, and not all that young, and I spend a goodly amount of time prancing around in high heels and dresses. I feel like it's a part of me, but I also feel like it's a bit silly, too. What would anyone really think if they saw me? I feel pretty and serene when I'm dressed, and I really like feeling that way. But like Julie said:

It makes me understand the horror and repulsion someone else might feel, seeing it from the outside and having no clue at all of what is going on in my head.

I understand that; I feel very much the same way.

[Angela Burke]

Yes sometimes extremely silly.
Silly to the point of laughing out loud and thinking "What the f***k do you look like?"
But always enjoyable.