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  1. #1
    I LOOK like a guy... Casey Morgan's Avatar
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    FTM-MTF couples

    I know a lot of the MTFs seem to be looking for your "typical" GG, someone who enjoys being female all the time and hasn't ever really considered being a man. That's great, and I'd be happy doing a "me too" on that idea.

    But I would really like to find a FTM. Someone with whom we can both just be ourselves. Whichever we need to be at any given point, male or female, it's understood that we'll be that. Boys time, girls time, mixed time, reversed mixed time, it doesn't matter as long as that's what we need then. We'll each want both of the other's sides to be a part of our life.

    When one of us is having a hard time we'll know the other truly means it when they say they understand. We'll support and encourage each other in everything, not just CDing. No gender-based rules, no gender-based expectations. Honesty, committment, openness, those will be the cornerstones of our relationship.

    What are your thoughts on this? Is the kind of relationship I'm looking for realistic or is it more of an ideal that may not come to pass?
    Androgynes: the quantum bits of the gender binary.

  2. #2
    Shining Through Teresa Amina's Avatar
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    Quite an idea, but aren't there many, many more mtf than ftm? It's crossed my mind that it "could" be the solution to the problem of the gg not being able to handle our dual selves. You might have to wait in line! Would definitely be an interesting life. Perhaps the ftm contingent can contribute their thoughts to this.

  3. #3
    Swishy Pirate CaptLex's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shari_Ann
    Is the kind of relationship I'm looking for realistic or is it more of an ideal that may not come to pass?
    Shari Ann:

    I think this kind of relationship makes as much sense as any other kind (if not more). After discussing all different kinds of TG relationships with my support group and my therapist and realizing that each one is subject to unforeseen pitfalls and detours which need patience, communication and dedication to work through, I honestly think this could work out well since each partner would have a head start in having some idea what to expect.

    I'd be curious to hear what others - FtM, MtF, GG - might think.
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  4. #4
    oysters = kneecaps Abraxas's Avatar
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    I was in that type of relationship for awhile... I dated an MTF for 4 months. For many reasons it didn't work out, but i think it could in general. The problem was, while I saw her as female no matter what she was (or wasn't) wearing, she never saw me as male. That bothered me, because I respected her enough to always use female pronouns and call her by her female name, and she didn't show me the same respect. And this wasn't an occasional slip, either. It was about 50% of the time that she used female pronouns for me.
    Of course, respect is an essential part of any relationship, so... yeah.
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  5. #5
    Quiet Member ReginaK's Avatar
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    It's an interesting idea. Something i'd consider. But like it was said earlier, there simply aren't that many FtMs. And it seems like there aren't that many straight FtMs either.
    Hail Satin!

  6. #6
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    i am in a relationship with a MTF and i am of course FTM its been almost 6months now......going good

  7. #7
    Gender Undecided Fainne the King's Avatar
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    If I ever broke up with my current bf, that would probably be the easiest relationship to have, since there wouldn't have to be that awkward, "well...you see....I have a vagina" that might put off a lot of people. We could both accept each other better and plus I find men crossdressing very sexy. I got my bf to do it once, but he swears never again. Of course, there'll be problems to every relationship, but I think that's just with personality, not anything to do with gender identity.
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  8. #8
    Looking for friends Karen Edmonton's Avatar
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    I don't know if you want to hear from me , but I'D LOVE to find a FTM that would be willing to get together for drinks !!
    This girl just wants to have fun !!!

  9. #9
    Junior Member Terri Li's Avatar
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    i wouldnt mind

    I wouldnt mind having a relationship with either mtf or ftm
    i crossdress, i like guys i dont care whether you were fem or male i want a close relationship.

  10. #10
    I LOOK like a guy... Casey Morgan's Avatar
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    I really appreciate everyone's comments. I had been wondering if I was the only one who was interested in such a relationship. It's nice to know I'm not. I guess the key is to know yourself well enough to really know what you want, and truly respect what the other person wants.

    Abraxas: I'm sorry to hear about that relationship. Some people just can't see beyond their own nose.

    Kells: I'm glad to hear it. I hope everything continues to go well for both of you.
    Androgynes: the quantum bits of the gender binary.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shari_Ann
    Kells: I'm glad to hear it. I hope everything continues to go well for both of you.
    thanks Shari_Ann

  12. #12
    Bandit Keith sparro's Avatar
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    Personnally, I don't think the kind of support you are talking about would be there in a MTF FTM relationship. There would be what you had in common, which would feel great. But really, I think that if you were both struggling with it, and suffering through it, there would only be a greater tension in between the two of you.
    I suppose it's different for me in a way, because I'm a FTM and I'm currently dating a GG who likes men. So, it's working out for us.We can still appear "normal", whatever that is.
    I think a friendship with one would be much more useful and better for that kind of understanding because there is a different kind of bond in a friendship, and different boundries when you are dating a person. Within relationships I've found there is often a bit more competion, strangely enough In relationships I look more for support, and in friendships I look more for understanding.
    I don't know if any of what I just said makes a bit of sense.

  13. #13
    Junior Member Terri Li's Avatar
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    i can express both genders

    i can express both genders, id love to date whoever will love me.
    i wouldnt find it hard to date ftm or mtf. I want acceptance that i can be either male or female

    ive fantasized being married to a guy and also to mtf. i dont see the problem when they can accept me.

  14. #14
    The true Drama Queen Kimberly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shari_Ann
    But I would really like to find a FTM. Someone with whom we can both just be ourselves. Whichever we need to be at any given point, male or female, it's understood that we'll be that. Boys time, girls time, mixed time, reversed mixed time,
    Can you imagine the sex games?? :evil:

    hehehehe...

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