Married CD-ers: How much does your Spouse know?

[Dutchess]

If Im only going to be around other ladies only I dont care at all . I'm just super super straight . I have my own bohemian/Carnaby street style I've kept 45 years. My parts are covered , showing stuff/too short/too tight at my age sends a pathetic message. I dont want men thinking of me that way .

My ex husband oh boy , could not tell the truth even if the truth was better . He learned to do this from years of hiding and lying about who he really was and even though I asked him before we married he still lied about it completely . I caught him a few years later . He was another one who insisted and STILL insists he is totally straight yet really gets into advertising himself all social media in lingerie to other males / transfolk and had a VERY active online sex life with chasers and other trans/cd folk , so much so that I finally was left out completely . I just simply didnt have the right parts .
If I asked him about this he would blame me for not wanting sex ,, which I see here alot too so I really wonder..I finally got tired of it and we had separate rooms. He would not disuss it any further .

The thing was is that he was ok with all this behavior and really enjoyed his hidden/second life but when I would pose the prospect of an open marriage ( I was trying to remain together for my youngest child ) he would explode ...
so .. I was to put up with all the chasers and his extra activity with cd'ers ad transfolk but literally stay alone in my room or by myself through the rest of my life . I finally declined and he was still very shocked and very angry . My counselor helped me see that I was a cover for him to his family and friends back in the Netherlands . When I left home and went with Kat I was still accused of cheating .. so it was going to be really bad for me no matter what . He can do whatever with who ever ..but I had to stay a nun ...

I know I m not alone ,, there are some here who know exactly what I am talking about too .
I hope my words help someone do better.