What am I planning?

[Maria 60]

Yesterday I was straighting out my fem closets as my wife was sitting and watching and talking to me. At one point she asked when do I plan on wearing most of my stuff, I seem to be saving the better guality and name brand hoisiey and clothes.
She pointed out that I have so much stuff I never use but I'm sixty when do I plan on wearing it, she asked me if I'm waiting for something to happen, some form of break though or am I going to evolve. She just bluntly straight out asked me "what are you planning"?
I really couldn't answer her, I don't know if anyone remembers back in the day Leggs brand pantyhose were sold in a egg shape package. I still have a few of those that I'm saving and I won't wear them almost like I don't want to ruin them. But in the mean time I'm losing out on the amazing sansation they give and the enjoyment I get wearing them, almost like I wouldn't have never believe in my life time that I would have all this stuff and don't want to take it for granted.
She tells me she guesses it also goes back to a wine or cigar collectors, spends all there lives collecting and die and never get to enjoy there collection.
She is right I do have some expensive hoisiey and I don't know if it's some kind of hoarding or I don't want to lose having them or is my mind telling me maybe one day I will go out and I want my best stuff and rather save them for a special occasion that I don't know what that would be.
I really honestly don't know why I can't bring myself to opening them and wearing them, I'm just satisfied they are there. I was thinking last night why I am like this and I'm just wondering anyone else here could relate at all.

[bridget thronton]

I suspect I do a bit of the same - I buy things when I cannot dress or when something catches my eye and I keep thinking about buying it. I have some historic costumes (Renaissance fair dresses, Victorian dresses, drindl dress) and a couple of formal dresses that I am not sure I would wear outside unless I were attending events like Princess Chantel.

[Sandi Beech]

I kind of think of my nicer items in the same way someone might admire the coins in a coin collection etc. I wish I could line them up on display. I really like my Gianni Bini black sequin mini dress and yet I have only worn it a few times. I would hate to depart with it. In my case I tend to get sentimental value attached to things I have gone out in even though I may never wear them again.

I used to get a lot of those Eggs in years past. You must have kept those a good long while. Anyhow, I can see how one might hang on to such items as collectors do. After all, some of us say it is a hobby of sorts.

Sandi

[Stephanie47]

Maria, your wife has a point which has been brought up on a recent thread. There are women who have a closet stuffed with dresses, bras and panties and heels lined up on the floor, and, then there are minimalists who go into a panic when receiving an invitation that require a new outfit. I am a suppressed cross dresser in a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" marriage. My wife knows, but does not say "boo" about it. Totally ostrich, stick head in the ground. What's my release? How do I satisfy the need? I am on this site. But, I buy things that I know I will never wear which seem to fall into your wife's assessment of the cigar or wine collector. So, yesterday my order of Vanity Fair panties arrived from its on-line store; my favorite panties styles in some new colors. For instance in Vanity Fair style 13109 I have 141 different colors. I know I will never wear all of them. To me they fill a void. It's sort of like collecting stamps or coins or baseball cards. But, I do have other material things that I collect. One is within the context of the panty collection; my collection of Peanuts graphic tees.

Maria, at least if you drop dead tomorrow your wife will not be shock to find your wardrobe. It's there in plain site.

[daphne g]

I do that too
But once a year it’s Karneval here in Germany which is spread over a couple of weeks and we go away for about 4 days near the end ,I am always dressed and try to use as much of that best stuff as I can,you can’t take it with you when you die can you,or can you?

[Rhonda M.]

I really couldn't answer her, I don't know if anyone remembers back in the day Leggs brand pantyhose were sold in a egg shape package.

I remember L'eggs in the plastic egg package. My first gurl purchase at the supermarket. I was nervous as hell!

[Helen_Highwater]

Maria,

The feeling I get from reading your posts and the comments your wife makes is that she's trying to tell you you need to get out more. You have an accepting, no more than that, encouraging wife who repeatedly has prodded you into doing things. I see her comment as asking, "When are you going to start wearing this stuff out and about on a regular basis". You have the green light, go for it. If you need to dress away from home to avoid neighbours, family and friends then do so. Make a plan and do it!

Time slips by and the longer you leave it the less chance you have to experience actually using these things for what they were intended.

[JulieC]

Maria, I definitely can relate. I have a few different things which I rarely rare because I don't want to ruin them. I have no idea of some particular event that I might get to wear them for where they would be perfect. But, I keep them largely unworn anyway.

When it comes to pantyhose, I'm similar. I have a pair of blue-grey pantyhose that go perfect with an out fit that I rarely wear. I've had those pantyhose for 10+ years. I don't want to wear them because it's very hard to find pantyhose of the color they are, and I want to have them if the need arises. I also have a pair of Wolford thigh high holdups that I've worn maybe three times. I love them! I don't want to use them up. I suppose I could buy more; they are readily available. But, these are mine, and I like knowing I have them. I also have some Wolford tights in a very interesting design. Likewise, I rarely wear them.

On the L'Eggs pantyhose still in their original plastic egg packaging; those pantyhose are at least 30 years old now. I know from experience that some, if not most, pantyhose will deteriorate with time, even if left untouched for all that time. You may find the hose unusable by the time you crack those eggs!

[docrobbysherry]

Yes and no. Maria. If I haven't worn something it's because I haven't had time or the occasion to wear it!

I have a semi trailer of women's things. But, most everything was bought when I only dressed at home in private and came from thrift stores.

So, I can wear it all at home in photos.
But, most of it is ill fitting, cheesy, or in too poor condition to wear out in public!

[CDMargret]

Guilty. I so have a hoard of Danskin plus footed tights that I can't seem to find anymore. So I keep them in a box while trying to be so very careful with my current pairs that I wear. They are tough as nails yet fade after lots of washings. Along with a pair of red satin heel I keep in their box on the top shelf saving for the special occasion that never arrives. I have two dress identical to two that i wear as replacements for when their worn out.

It's funny, sad and yet I am afraid when their gone their gone. Should be living in the moment and shopping for tomorrow. Oh how I love shopping for new outfits and accessories.

[Cheryl T]

I have much more than I could wear for sure.
If I wore a different outfit every day I think I could go about 6 months without wearing the same combination.
It's just so hard to say "I'll probably never wear that so I'll donate it". I love all my clothes ! Is that such a sin?

[alwayshave]

Maria, I have more clothes than I could ever wear. My wife has asked on several occasions, "why do you have all these panties and slips?" I really don't have an answer. I plan on wearing them someday.

[rachael j.]

Maria, I tried on a pair of pantyhose that I'd had for over 12 years,still in original packaging, unopened, and as I was putting them on, I could feel the elastic in the panty breaking and running. I was so upset I ended up changing my whole outfit because of it. They did not age well. I seem to remember reading something about freezing your pantyhose before you first first wear them (defrost before wearing). Has anyone else heard this? As for collections, I have lots and lots of pantyhose that I've worn (sometimes several times), washed and in bags in me closet. When getting dressed to go out, I usually grab a new pair just because I don't have to worry about any existing runs.

[kimdl93]

Interesting. I totally understand having some possessions (of any kind) that seem just to nice or special to use on an every day basis. Even treasuring something so much that its kept as a keepsake. Perhaps your wife is looking at those treasured Leggs eggs, for example, and suggesting they have become collectible. And maybe as others have said, she is asking if your would be interested in having opportunities to wear some of the things that you have up until now been setting aside.

Sometimes the appropriate answer to a question is another question. You might ask your wife a couple questions to clarify both your understandings. She is obviously supportive. So one question might be whether she would support the idea of you finding suitable opportunities to get out fully dressed, other than the occasional drive. Also, I do not know if you are interested in taking this farther. Would you want to go out fully dressed and made if your wife was willing to accompany you?

[jjjjohanne]

I watched this TED talk recently and it has been affecting me. I want to stop saving stuff up for later and just wear lovely things now, on "undeserving" outings.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiVHSRY2I5Y